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Topic: Women
ujGearhead's photo
Wed 12/16/09 11:57 AM






It's only a second date. The idea is to get to know each other better. Right? GUYS CAN'T READ MINDS! Maybe he has no clue what you'd want to do/where to go without redoing the first date? Chances are that he doesn't want to take you somewhere you'd hate and kill the idea of a third date. Have you given him any ideas/clues as to what you'd like to do? Do you expect him to make ALL decisions? I was under the impression that a relationship is supposed to be 50/50. You planning on it being 100/0 if it works out? Communication is one of the major factors to a good relationship. If you don't have it now, do you think you'll have it later???????


Yes, just a second date. I decided what we did on the first date and specifically asked him what he wanted to do when he asked me out again. He has given it no thought at all and won't even give me an idea of what he wants to do. I can't read minds either. Why should one person make all the decisions? I'm obviously not looking for someone to make all the decisions, but, I do not want to date a guy who is completely indecisive.

When did I say I expected it to be 100/0, rather than 50/50? It would be the other way around if I decided what to do on this date as well.

As for not having it now or later, that's exactly why I want him to even give me an idea of what he'd like to do. Chances are, if I keep deciding what we're doing on dates, that's the way it will always be. He's given no input whatsoever.


Ok, I wasn't aware of what the arrangements and whatnot were on the first date. Kinda curious why HE had to ask YOU out for the second? I definatly know what you mean though about one person making all the decisions. Her excuse always was "I don't know what's around here!". Granted she wasn't from ANYWHERE near my area, but C'MON! I live a 1/2 hour or less from practicly ANYTHING! So, usually ended up just hanging out at home(or aimless cruising on the bike).


He emailed me the next day and told me he wanted to go out again, so I asked what he had in mind. He didn't have to ask, he just happened to do so.

Anyway, my point is I'm not interested in someone who is very indecisive. If he's like this in the beginning, he's not going to change.


How long did you know him? How long have you talked? To what extent? Going by minimal info, who knows what he's thinking.

no photo
Wed 12/16/09 11:59 AM
Not long. A week or so before going on the first date. However, there were several emails. Even if he wasn't sure what I'd want to do, he could have thrown out an idea or two about what he might enjoy. It doesn't matter, really. We're just not a good match, that's all. Perhaps there's a lady out there who is fine with a guy like that. We're not all the same, though :wink:.

ujGearhead's photo
Wed 12/16/09 12:05 PM

Not long. A week or so before going on the first date. However, there were several emails. Even if he wasn't sure what I'd want to do, he could have thrown out an idea or two about what he might enjoy. It doesn't matter, really. We're just not a good match, that's all. Perhaps there's a lady out there who is fine with a guy like that. We're not all the same, though :wink:.


In that time period and some emails, you don't really 'get somebody'. You're right though. He should have thrown a few ideas out there. All you can do is go with what you 'feel'.

Dragoness's photo
Wed 12/16/09 12:09 PM
The differences make it difficult but ya gotta love the fact there are differences. All the same thing would be sooooo very boring.

no photo
Wed 12/16/09 12:10 PM
Edited by singmesweet on Wed 12/16/09 12:11 PM
In that time period and some emails, you don't really 'get somebody'. You're right though. He should have thrown a few ideas out there. All you can do is go with what you 'feel'.


Right. How do you find out much about someone when they reply with "I dunno" to all questions? hah. I know men complain about women assuming they can read our minds, but it's the same for us, too. We can't be expected to figure out what a guy wants if he doesn't tell us.

motowndowntown's photo
Wed 12/16/09 12:12 PM

Why do they hide stuff you need to know about them until you really start liking them?:banana: :banana: :banana:


Maybe she just wasn't that into you.

Hoss1's photo
Wed 12/16/09 12:13 PM
all a guy is usually ever thinkin is id like sumthin to eat,sumthin cold to drink,and i wanna see sumthin nekkid...thas it in a nutshell..:wink:

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