YES



I got my phone blown up last night from a guy who I had a great date with and then he totally blew me off. This was late spring, and I heard nothing from him until last night. Hemmed and hawed then finally said he was scared and wants to make it up to me. My BS meter is screaming and I think thre was just someone else he wanted to meet or thought he could do better and now he wants me to give him another chance.

YES



I got my phone blown up last night from a guy who I had a great date with and then he totally blew me off. This was late spring, and I heard nothing from him until last night. Hemmed and hawed then finally said he was scared and wants to make it up to me. My BS meter is screaming and I think thre was just someone else he wanted to meet or thought he could do better and now he wants me to give him another chance.

I get this a lot... I'm tired of people thinking it is okay to treat other people like crap and they are supposed to like it.

What happened to the Golden Rule??

I know. Dating just sucks, in general, doesn't it?

Why do they hide stuff you need to know about them until you really start liking them?

Retort:

Why do men always lie about their motives for everything and then you never find out until later?

Men are easy. If he's the least bit attracted to ya', he's gonna' wanna' see how it fits.

hah. I had someone ask me out on a second date and I asked him what he had in mind for the date. He said "I dunno." So, I told him to think about it. A couple days later, he asked me what I wanted to do. I told him to think about it and let me know. Haven't heard anything and we were supposed to go out tomorrow night. Probably not now, since he's too indecisive.

It's only a second date. The idea is to get to know each other better. Right? GUYS CAN'T READ MINDS! Maybe he has no clue what you'd want to do/where to go without redoing the first date? Chances are that he doesn't want to take you somewhere you'd hate and kill the idea of a third date. Have you given him any ideas/clues as to what you'd like to do? Do you expect him to make ALL decisions? I was under the impression that a relationship is supposed to be 50/50. You planning on it being 100/0 if it works out? Communication is one of the major factors to a good relationship. If you don't have it now, do you think you'll have it later???????

So, um, he didn't even give it any thought... He was asked to make one decision. Here is my thinking: If a guy can't just pick somewhere and go there then I am supposed to believe it's because he really can't stop stressing it might not be the "right place" and will blow all chances of a third date? Yep.

And relationships are 100/100. 50/50 means each party does a half assed job=failure. You either give it your all and so do they, or it doesn't work.

It's only a second date. The idea is to get to know each other better. Right? GUYS CAN'T READ MINDS! Maybe he has no clue what you'd want to do/where to go without redoing the first date? Chances are that he doesn't want to take you somewhere you'd hate and kill the idea of a third date. Have you given him any ideas/clues as to what you'd like to do? Do you expect him to make ALL decisions? I was under the impression that a relationship is supposed to be 50/50. You planning on it being 100/0 if it works out? Communication is one of the major factors to a good relationship. If you don't have it now, do you think you'll have it later???????

And relationships are 100/100. 50/50 means each party does a half assed job=failure. You either give it your all and so do they, or it doesn't work.

To his defense, I think he was making a reference to cooperation, sharing, etc.

BUT, I get what you mean. Personally, if I'm interested in a woman, after a 2nd date, I have a dozen different 2nd or 3rd dates in mind. Not that they are absolutes. I'm always open to her opinion, but from "singmesweet's" description, she made it pretty clear, she wanted the guy to make the decision.

The reason I did it that way was because he was giving me absolutely no idea about anything. I have no problem with throwing out ideas and seeing what works well. His responses to everything were "I dunno" and "whatever you want is fine." That gets old very quickly.

Yes, just a second date. I decided what we did on the first date and specifically asked him what he wanted to do when he asked me out again. He has given it no thought at all and won't even give me an idea of what he wants to do. I can't read minds either. Why should one person make all the decisions? I'm obviously not looking for someone to make all the decisions, but, I do not want to date a guy who is completely indecisive.

When did I say I expected it to be 100/0, rather than 50/50? It would be the other way around if I decided what to do on this date as well.

As for not having it now or later, that's exactly why I want him to even give me an idea of what he'd like to do. Chances are, if I keep deciding what we're doing on dates, that's the way it will always be. He's given no input whatsoever.

Oh I agree, but they lie about it. Then they call women psycho biotches who need medication.

Ok, I wasn't aware of what the arrangements and whatnot were on the first date. Kinda curious why HE had to ask YOU out for the second? I definatly know what you mean though about one person making all the decisions. Her excuse always was "I don't know what's around here!". Granted she wasn't from ANYWHERE near my area, but C'MON! I live a 1/2 hour or less from practicly ANYTHING! So, usually ended up just hanging out at home(or aimless cruising on the bike).