Three men die on Christmas Eve and go to heaven, where they're met by Saint Peter. "In order to get in," he tells them, "you must each produce something representative of the holidays."

The first man digs into his pockets and pulls out a match and lights it. "This represents a candle of hope." Impressed, Peter let's him in.

The second man pulls out a tangle of keys and shakes them. "These are bells." He's allowed in too.

"So," Peter says to the third man, "what do you have?"

The third man proudly shows him a pair of red panties.

"What do those have to do with Christmas?" asks Peter.

"They're Carol's"

I am gonna share this one with my family. They will love it.

I'm glad you liked it. My grandmother actually told this to me last night. I couldn't believe it! She is one SWWWWWWWEET A$$ granny!

Sounds like it... Give her these for me...

will do! Thanks, I'm sure she'll love them.

lol that was a good one :P

HAH!!! That one is good enough to steal for the team site...lmao

As a very young child my Hell & Brimstone Peacher /Guardian has delivered a long grinding presentation on the things we should NOT want for Christmas and how we should be greatful for recieving the Christchild. Thinking he has throughly prepared my child's brain to say Baby Jesus he storms from the pulpit and demands to know what I want for Christmas and I promptly stand up in front of the entire congregation lift my skirt and state I want "Ruffled panties like these Daddy". lol It is a miracle he didn't throttle me right there.

LOL SOULBREEZE. ILL DO YOU ONE BETTER?? LOL LMFAO " A WOMEN DIES AND GOES TO THE GATES OF HEAVEN. ITS A BEAUTIFUL PLACE. WHEN ST PETER CAME BY, SHE SAID HOW DO YOU GET INTO HEAVEN ?? ST PETER SAYS, YOU HAVE TO SPELL A WORD?? THE WOMEN ASK'S, WHAT WORD ?? ST PETER SAID " LOVE ". THE WOMEN SPELLS LOVE, AND SHE GETS INTO HEAVEN. A YEAR LATER ST PETER CAME TO HER, AND ASK'ED HER TO WATCH THE GATES THAT DAY. ALL OF A SUDDEN, HER HUSBAND ARRIVES. IM SURPRISED TO SEE YOU, THE WIFE SAYS , HOW HAVE YOU BEEN?? THE HUSBAND SAY'S . IM DOING PRETTY WELL SINCE YOU DIED. I MARRIED THE BEAUTIFUL YOUNG NURSE WHO TOOK CARE OF YOU WHEN YOU WERE ILL. AND THEN I WON THE MULTI STATELOTTO. I SOLD OUR LITTLE HOUSE AND BOUGHT A HUGE MANSION. AND MY WIFE AND I, TRAVELED ALL AROUND THE WORLD. WE WERE ON A VACATION, IN CANCUN. I WENT WATERSKIING TODAY , I FELL AND HIT MY HEAD, AND HERE I AM. WHAT A BUMMER. HOW DO I GET IN?? THE WIFE SAYS? YOU HAVE TO SPELL A WORD?? " WHICH WORD? " HER HUSBAND ASK'ED?? THE WIFE SAYS " CZECHOSLOVAKIA "

OMG...that is classic.

Good one honey