Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old
fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: "Free
to good home. You want it, you take it." For three days the fridge sat
there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually decided
that people were too un-trusting of this deal. It looked to good to be
true, so he changed the sign to read: "Fridge for sale $50." The next
day someone stole it.

Caution... They Walk Among Us!


One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someone
shouted...."Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked up at the sky and
said..."where???"

They Walk among us!!


While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which
direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking
him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the north?" When
my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has for
sometime, she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with that
stuff."

They Walk Among Us!!


I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I
got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was
open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days
a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end
the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific" . .

They Walk Among Us!!!


My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we
overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn
she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a
convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was
moving".

They Walk Among Us!!!!


I told the girl at the steakhouse register that I wanted the half pound
sirloin. She informed me they only had an 8 ounce sirloin. Not wanting
to make a scene, I told her I would take the 8 ounce steak instead of
the half-pounder.

They walk among us!


My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car it's designed to cut through
a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk...

They Walk Among Us!!!!!


My friends and I were on a Pepsi run and noticed that the cases were
discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier
multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount....

They Walk Among Us!!!!!!


I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring
attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, "Wouldn't the chain
rip out every time she turned her head?" I had to explain that a
person's nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way
the head is turned...

They Walk Among Us!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to the
lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed
up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained
professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, "Has your
plane arrived yet?"...

They Walk Among Us!!!!!!!!


While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza
to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like
it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before
responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough
to eat 6 pieces.

Yep, They Walk Among Us, too.!!!!!!!!


And yes ... sadly...not only do they walk among us, they also reproduce

lmao that was some funny stuff man

Those were good Amerk
Some of them sound like things my daughter says

Great stories, Amerken!

I had a car I brought over from Europe. I was stopped for speeding in
Virginia.

The cop was very nice about it. He explained to me that I was probably
speeding because my speedometer was in kilometers, rather than miles per
hour.... He sent me on my way without a ticket.



Oceans

I was driving through a severe thunder storm, just about to cross county
line road, when the downpour stopped very abruptly, the sun was sudenly
out,the road was dry. I exclaimed to my (now) ex-wife, "man, what a
change". She replied, "must be because were in a different county now".
she was seriouse.

Great Amerken, but just think, you might have to depend
on one of them in an emergency.