Well gang my ex finally had enough kicked our son out last...Friday.Now because he is 16 there is nothing that can be done..He will not come live with me and hes running around staying with who ever will take him. I,am scare3d for him ,but i can not live his life..... He has my number and knows where i lve....Hes now into eating magic mushrooms along with his booze and smoking dope. hes not ready and god is the only one who knows when and if he ever will be..I,am scared,frustarted worried and what ever else you can think of

16? i thought they were considered adults when they are 18? am I wrong? I should think you would still have control over him- well as much as the all knowing teenager will let you but he's still just 16-go get his azz!!! bring him home!!!

am I wrong? is 16 considered an adult now?

Best of luck to you!!!! I know you are scared for him but isn't there anything ANYONE can do??????

As a parent you should do everything you can to put some sense in his head . 16 is still young and knows little about this world . If I were you I would spend time, energy and money to try to find him and to counsel him . At 16 alone in a world full of crimes, pedophiles, frauds, drugs....etc is just plain scary and worrisome .
I wish you and the rst of the family good luck and all my best wishes .

Hopefully he'll straighten his life out soon. It sounds like there's a lot more to the story.

Ultimately it is up to him to deceide when or if he will turn his life around.

I would try to talk him into staying with you. Try to talk to him. It sounds like he has some issues he is struggling with. If you can talk to him, try to talk him into seeing a counselor or other professonal that can help him deal with his issues properly.


I hope things work out for the best for your son and yourself.

unless he is legally emancipated....I believe you and your ex are still responsible for him

There IS something you can do!!!!

You can kick your kids out all you want to. (You being plural here)
However, if they refuse to go, you cannot make them and if you force them to leave, then you are still reliable for them.

Trust me, I learned all of the laws of adolescents! I have a 18 year old who was horrible for 5 years, then he out grew it!

You are his father! You have every right to get him and take him with you!

at 16 there's still a chance to get him on the right road....conseling, scared straight, or kick his a$$....good luck and stay strong

16 is very young..and yes you are still legally responsible for him if something should happen to him. My 25 year old son was very challenging at that age and was using...so I understand. He is in pain, he needs help... not a lesson in "can you survive on the streets". It is a very dangerous gamble...and I do understand the frustration.
My very best to you...

Some People just wont listen and will never learn untill THEY really decide to..When i was 16 there was no reasoning with me and i was my own person.. My parents did what they could (once even physically restrained me)But no amount of love Discipline and advice from a real grown up about life would convince me i wasnt my own man yet..

So i ran the streets staying where i could and doing basically whatever was around that was being done.. i spent a good chunk of my life so far runnin around like i didnt have a family..I met alot of really neat weird fun and good people.. but also was put into quite a few comprimising situations with some real bad guys... in the end over a period of 7 years i had lived in like 5 states.. and wandered into so many towns for up to a month at a time i lost count of places and faces ..Been without shelter a couple of times... (once me an a buddy slept in an igloo in colorado)

Over the years i wondered what i was looking for in this endless trip to the next camping music festival i could sneak into... I felt lonely as hell was often tired hungry and stole to eat on occasion .. The road is VERY long and VERY hard and some terrible things WILL happen if he choses that path.. its basically A life of discomfort for brief moments of bliss and freedom..I thought i Tried to stop living like that a few times .. but untill i was TRULY done there was no stopping me...

What did it for me was having a child w and old friend on a trip to my home city... Shes five now and After all that searching and RUNNING from my family.. when i felt lost and alone and couldnt understnd what i needed... it was family the very thing i was running from.. So i Basically put myself through some of the toughest times of my life, lost friends and watched friends get locked up because of our shitty decisions.. to learn EXACTLY what my dad was trying to tell me all along...

Sorry this is so long But i Pray for you that your son doesnt Take as long as i did to "do it for myself".. i put my family through alot of pain wondering when they would get "the call"..But in the end if he refuses to be swayed , just let him know he is loved missed worried about.. and ALLWAYS welcome home...You cant live or change his life He HAS to do that..

As a young man my enemy was my father.. as a man hes my best friend.. cant wait to see what i know when im a old man..

Good luck .. B patient

Never lose hope .. one day i realized the obvious and my whole life turned around ..

I can certainly understand the road you choose, for I have experienced it first hand. I'll add that you are very fortunate to have survived those years. However you also know that road is very dangerous and I'm sure you saw some die...I know of many who have. Overdose, alcohol poisoning, and beatings..I let my son run a muck for some time waiting for him to work it out on his own, I felt it was time to intervene and I believe as he does that it saved his life. Some jail time to get clean was not a bad thing for him.
The boy this man is referring to is 16....just last summer I watched a 16 year old boy die from an overdose that his "friends" administered. You had a child..this boy has only his self destructive pain.
My advise to this father is get your child off the street, use all the resources you can, and then seek out more.
If something terrible (more terrible than this) should happen to him you will never be able to forgive yourself.

God's Speed

Obviously I don't know the whole story here, but just from what you state about him taking mushrooms, he is definitely in a bad way right now. Have you gone looking for him? He needs to know that the support of his family is there, to help him, with whatever he is going through. And, what do you suppose caused him to become the way he currently is? And again, this just being my opinion and not knowing really what is going on...wouldn't an option be for you to let the police know about him, and have them take him in. Maybe that will help him see the reality of his life..and how much worse it may become. Or maybe send him into rehab? He is just to young for you to give up on him yet. This is so sad.

16??? I couldn't give up on my child at 16 and I didn't! No one said fatherhood or motherhood was easy, and it's not. You don't get to quit, get him some help.

My daughter now thanks me everyday for not giving up on her.

May you have the strength to see this hard time through!!

Have him enlisted into the ARMY!

He's 16!

When my son was having tough times at that age,I would have a pick up and hold on him every time he was out on the streets.
Do all you can to find this young man.He is your son,Do all you can to help him.

He is only 16 years old..how could he be kicked out? I think the law states that the parents are legally responsible for their child until they turn 18. I can only imagine how that boy feels, if he is having a problem with drugs...now is not the time to turn your back on him.
Have you ever thought about going out and finding him and putting him in a rehab facility? Maybe this is what he needs...you just can't turn your back on this young boy, he needs you now more then ever.
Good luck and I hope everything works out for your son.

Are rehabs free? I dont know the circumstances either but some 16 year old boys are stronger than their mom and drugs can cause some to be violent or aggressive which isnt safe for anyone else in the home. I dont know what recourse there are for parents if there is danger to them from their kids and I dont know if this is the situation. I feel for you and his mother and hope it somehow works out. There has to be a reason that even though he has an open home with his father he chooses the street, definitely seems like help is needed beyond what the parents can do,,but I dont know what that help would be.

this very thing happened to me, except my daughter moved out...trust me you are responsible for everything they do til they are 18!!!!! and kicking him out, not a good idea...could land you both in jail for neglect...i recommend the chins program...child in need of supervision. go to your local police department and ask about it. and if he won't come home, report him as a runaway. having the law involved in your life can be trying, but sometimes its your only option. just remember your ex wife needs protection from him, and he from himself

Well

Here in NY. They were legaly allowed to live where they wanted at 16!! But I was sued for child support and was still responsible for all medical fees!

They now changed that to 18

We are still now responsible though till they are 21!

Been through it with a daughter

It was tough lots of fighting and crying!!

She's now 24 and thanks me for hanging in there and she's always saying she's sorry!!

16 is a tough age for them!!

Good luck to you

whateve you do I certainly don't recommend calling the police.. H e may end up losing his freedom to the law at some time or another I did for a couple of short runs.. Yes I've seen jail be the trigger that sparked a real positive change in some peoples lives.. But losing your Freedom is a big deal all alone add a feeling of deep betrayal by your own blood for snitching...talk about a breeding ground for deep seeded distrust and anger.. I'm sure someone will say they're kids forgave and understand and that's what worked for them .... You risk driving him away forever.... The biggest issue w the penal system I've seen is almost EVERY one I know that did time as a juvie or adult jail and prison.. Made new friends ideas and thought patterns that they allowed to destroy them in one way or another....

hopefully he finds his way soon.. There has to be somebody he thinks understands maybe they could talk w him like a counselor.. But not some drug school certified ex junkie those guys are usually dbags.. It'd have to be someone he could respect more than that.. If he has a wild or "crazy" uncle that may work....maybeyou could find someone like that and encourage him to talk about why he feels the need to destroy himelf w bad choices.. He can't feel forced but a little "encouragement" may be necesarry... Its usually that he's in pain or doesn't like himself for one reason or another that we torture ourselves...

my thoughts are with you