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Topic: Shallow Be Thy Name
no photo
Thu 10/01/09 09:18 AM


Looks really don't matter to me, though I understand why they do...like I said in another post, no one cares what's on the inside if the outside looks like it was left on the side of the road in a rainstorm right next to a mud puddle.

Nothing anyone can do about it, regardless of us thinking we can. Deal with it, Lex has his stipulations, as we all do to some degree...like me, I can't date stupid...


There are people in the world who are so self-absorbed that they take everything personally, even when it has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with them.

Like I said earlier, not my problem.

But you don't see me attacking people just because their standards are different from mine. I'll say I can't understand those standards, or I'll say I would never share them -- but I'll never attack anyone for them. Because we're all different people, with different lives and histories and rationales -- who am I to say "Your standards are wrong"?

I'm not that self-absorbed.





Another reason to master the smiting so you can get rid of them....:wink:

no photo
Thu 10/01/09 03:53 PM


The more stipulations you put on what you are/ what you are not looking for makes it that much more difficult to ever be happy with something else. It amazes me when someone has this huge list of criteria that someone must fall into before you will even chat with them let alone date them! When I see this type of thing I often ask "and what are you offering?".


Except that I never said there was a huge list of criteria that that someone must fall into before I would even chat with them. Most of my friends here (maybe all of them) don't fall into that list.

And, just so we're straight on the meaning of that word "huge" -- I have THREE absolute deal-breakers. Now, that doesn't strike me as a "huge" list. Your mileage may vary.


Example of this, your profile states you have an "average" build and are 5'6".


Oh, here's the problem. You were looking at the wrong profile. Mine clearly states I'm 5'10".


Then we get to your photo. You are not exactly attractive. Now, being the superficial person I am, why would I even give you the time of day if you have nothing to offer, even in appearance, and you are on the short side for a man?


I think 5'10" is about average, actually. I can't address your comments about the rest because you're obviously looking at the wrong profile.


It doesn't not matter that you could have a great personality, a fantastic lover, etc..if no one can get past the description to even know the rest. So the level of your shallowness is actually a detriment to you ever finding a suitable mate.


That's one way to look at it. Another is to see it as me being open and honest about what I want, and what I don't want.

It's funny how some people get so rankled by someone just trying to cut through all the "red tape." I wonder if these people ever bother to stop and ask themselves "Why am I getting so bent out of shape because someone has a differing opinion?"


Ah, then we get to your forum posts. They are one sided, you are closed minded to any new input, and you are condescending.


Nobody is forcing you to read them.


So, I have to ask myself, "What the hell is this person thinking?" You should just take whomever would be willing to chat with you and marry that person immediately because, in reality, that is the best you will ever get.


I'm not planning on getting married again.



I honestly was not directing that toward you. I co-mingled a lot of different thoughts & experiences and mashed them together. It was a generalized rant, and a loose depiction of my recent experience meeting someone for the first time. Sorry if it sounded like I was directing the rant at you.

s1owhand's photo
Thu 10/01/09 04:14 PM
Edited by s1owhand on Thu 10/01/09 04:38 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uGjh6duUPXc

LewisW123's photo
Thu 10/01/09 09:06 PM
I don't think it is shallow to be attracted to someone for their physical appearance, or to use physical attarictiveness in your criteria for finding someone.

If you find someone and you are with that person and you realize after a time, that they are mean, insensitive, bigoted, etc. and you would have left them if they weren't so good looking, rich, etc....or you don't leave them after realizing this...

...then yes, you are shallow.

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