My friend is going through a horrible divorce. They have one child together. He is the best father as they come. He picks her up from daycare, works forty hours a week, gives his ex-wife child support, and gives Claire all the love in the world. His wife, yesterday, was very nice and complient to letting him get to see her on his birthday (Halloween) and Christmas.

Today, she sent a letter to the GAL, stating reasons as to why he is not a suitable parent. One of the reasons being there was some poop on the babie's leg that he missed when changing her diaper.

This really upsets me. There are fathers out there denying there babies or beating the **** out of there kids.

Where as the good dads, get everything taken away from them...

Hopefully he is keeping good records and has a very good atty. Hopefully Karma happens to everyone!

Way to many women use their kids as pawns...it's despicable.

They need to pull their heads out of the azz's and realize not everything is about them, that there are other things more important...
like their children!

I hope it works out for this guy.

Divorce is usually tough and when the kids are involved it is tougher . Of course it is hard on the kids . Some parents use the children as a way to get even or punish the other parent which is a heart breaking issue nowadays . Some even invent stories of abuse....etc to try and get what they want . Can we just say " shame on them " ?.

If she writes the judge a really "over the top letter' nit picking that he didn't do a good job change the diaper the jusge is probably going to ask her why didn't you show him how to do it right or do it yourself. They see through all that "stuff".

If he really is a great dad like you say he is, then perhaps she's writing that letter out of anger for maybe something he did or did not to for her in the past, even in this current time...She might be getting revenge, which is totally wrong, especially since she has let him pick up his daughter, be with her and spend time with her....

A judge and the courts aren't just going to take his rights away. It will be a very long process . And as long as he is drug free, doesn't drink in front of his daughter, spends him with her and pays the child support then he'll still be allowed the visitation and she might end up feeling stupid.

Women who think it is still the woman who the court always favors need to wake up and smell the coffee of what those who spend time in the system everyday see and how many of them have also been ground up in a divorce by custodial Mom's who could not cope. Eventually the pendelum is swinging to a more neutral ground but young women need to be prepared to be non-custodial child support paying parents if they can not compeat with Dad.

Judge's aren't stupid. Without something more to go in, the most that will happen is the judge will order a child services investigation. If your friend is all that, he has nothing to worry about. But even more likely, the judge will see it for what it is. He may tell him to be more careful in the future, but I really don't think he's got anything to be concerned about.

Excuse me, it's not just women. I've known enough men using their kids as pawns during a divorce and after, just to harass and manipulate the ex-wife.

Anyone who does this, in my opinion, needs to have their visitation/custody revoked until they serious counseling to help them address this. I lived through it, it damages kids for a lifetime.

I agree that it's both sexes that use the children. I was never married to my daughter's father, we lived together for eight years. One day he decides he doesn't want to live with us. For four months he didn't say or do anything...then in March he filed with the courts false allegations..that I beat my daughter and drink every night. There are no records of any abuse. The GAL talked to him and he claims I'm sneaky and devious. First lawyer was a jerk and it cost me $1,500. Second lawyer is more but he's not putting up with the stuff from the other attorney. My daughter is caught in the middle of it and is forced to spend time with her dad every other weekend and she calls me crying. How can a person put their child through this? It tears at my heart.

I guess for one reason or another they are trying to get even or settle old wounds..... .

Double Post....... .

my ex was a diffcult person toget along with and i thought he would be a crappy dad but i have to say i have never seen a man a devoted to his child as he is to our daughter. we have even discussed them going to europe for vacation and i know she would love it. some parents are bad this is moms and dads but others give their life to their children.

The op is referring to a woman..my response is to that.