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| Topic: What to do? | |
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I had finally met a man that I felt compatible with. We've been on 5 awesome dates was feeling like I had finally met my match. He lives about an hour away and today I went to visit him at his home for the first time. I was totally disgusted by his living conditions. I couldn't wait to get out of there. There is no way I could live like that. I left pretending everything was okay but it is not. He is a super guy but I am so turned off I can't hardly stand it. I don't want to hurt his feelings but I don't want to just blow him off without an explanation either.....What's a girl to do in this situation?
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wow.....and he probably cleaned up before your arrival...
If he had a house cleaner would it be a "GO"????? |
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be honest and tell him to frikin clean up or break up
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What was so bad about it?
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I had finally met a man that I felt compatible with. We've been on 5 awesome dates was feeling like I had finally met my match. He lives about an hour away and today I went to visit him at his home for the first time. I was totally disgusted by his living conditions. I couldn't wait to get out of there. There is no way I could live like that. I left pretending everything was okay but it is not. He is a super guy but I am so turned off I can't hardly stand it. I don't want to hurt his feelings but I don't want to just blow him off without an explanation either.....What's a girl to do in this situation? knock him over the head dump him a river,or just burn his house down lol.just because hes hot doesnt mean hes clean. |
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If you are really thinking he is your match except for his housekeeping skills. Then you have a choice you can make up a lie and break it off or you can bite the bullet with as much tact as you can muster, telling him. Dude I am crazy about you, you know that... we have a problem with your housekeeping skills. Are you willing ot work on that. If he says no then it is later days.
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next date at his house, arrive in a french maid costume?
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The sad thing is that he did clean up before I arrived. I warned him I was kind of a neat freak. His kids showed up before I left and they expressed amazement about how clean the house was and it still was disgusting to me. Should I tell him how I feel or spare his feelings and make up another excuse? I'm so torn!
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honesty is always the best policy
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There was so much clutter...everywhere! The toilet was growing hair. The fruit flies were so abundant that I thought they might carry me away....even in the bathroom all over their tooth brushes. He had 2 cages in his bedroom full of rats and the mess that comes with them surrounding the cages. You couldn't pay me enough to clean the place. It was totally disgusting!
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Edited by
Cmyserenity
on
Wed 09/02/09 09:56 PM
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If you are really thinking he is your match except for his housekeeping skills. Then you have a choice you can make up a lie and break it off or you can bite the bullet with as much tact as you can muster, telling him. Dude I am crazy about you, you know that... we have a problem with your housekeeping skills. Are you willing ot work on that. If he says no then it is later days. You are so right....I have to tell him how I feel. |
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The sad thing is that he did clean up before I arrived. I warned him I was kind of a neat freak. His kids showed up before I left and they expressed amazement about how clean the house was and it still was disgusting to me. Should I tell him how I feel or spare his feelings and make up another excuse? I'm so torn! How bad a clean freak are you?? maybe his place isn't that bad??? I got some belly button lint on a womans floor once and she beat the sh-t out of me!!! I dirtied up her house--- 
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Honesty along with tact is the best policy.
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The sad thing is that he did clean up before I arrived. I warned him I was kind of a neat freak. His kids showed up before I left and they expressed amazement about how clean the house was and it still was disgusting to me. Should I tell him how I feel or spare his feelings and make up another excuse? I'm so torn! How bad a clean freak are you?? maybe his place isn't that bad??? I got some belly button lint on a womans floor once and she beat the sh-t out of me!!! I dirtied up her house--- My home is clean enough to be healthy but dirty enough to be happy...mostly because I can't afford housekeeper!....lol I feel like people can only be as healthy as their environment and that was not healthy! |
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WOW!!! Those conditions do sound disgusting! I'm no neat freak, but toilets dirty?? No way!! Bugs!!! Nooooooooooo!!! It makes me wonder if he's only put his best foot forward on those 5 dates. If he is that oblivious to sanitation, it probably explains why he is single and it is indicative of his perspective in other areas of his life.
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The way a person lives, takes care of themselves, personal hygiene- it's all part of the equation.
I say he isn't ever going to change - move it along. |
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There was so much clutter...everywhere! The toilet was growing hair. The fruit flies were so abundant that I thought they might carry me away....even in the bathroom all over their tooth brushes. He had 2 cages in his bedroom full of rats and the mess that comes with them surrounding the cages. You couldn't pay me enough to clean the place. It was totally disgusting! that's nasty. i'd run. now. |
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The way a person lives, takes care of themselves, personal hygiene- it's all part of the equation. I say he isn't ever going to change - move it along. I totally agree with you...but I really liked this guy and would have never imagined he'd lived the way he does. I know I have to move on but do I tell him how I really feel or do I spare him the imbarrassement? |
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Edited by
Calleigh12
on
Wed 09/02/09 10:54 PM
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The way a person lives, takes care of themselves, personal hygiene- it's all part of the equation. I say he isn't ever going to change - move it along. I totally agree with you...but I really liked this guy and would have never imagined he'd lived the way he does. I know I have to move on but do I tell him how I really feel or do I spare him the imbarrassement? If you're planning on moving on, I guess it's up to you if you want to tell him why. It might help him in the future, if he's willing to change. At least he'll know other people have a problem with his lifestyle. |
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The sad thing is that he did clean up before I arrived. I warned him I was kind of a neat freak. His kids showed up before I left and they expressed amazement about how clean the house was and it still was disgusting to me. Should I tell him how I feel or spare his feelings and make up another excuse? I'm so torn! How bad a clean freak are you?? maybe his place isn't that bad??? I got some belly button lint on a womans floor once and she beat the sh-t out of me!!! I dirtied up her house--- My home is clean enough to be healthy but dirty enough to be happy...mostly because I can't afford housekeeper!....lol I feel like people can only be as healthy as their environment and that was not healthy! Had a friend way back i couldn't go in his place---things were living in his carpet and he never let the cat out. Understand what you might be saying. Dump him---your young. Got lots of time for men  clean ones at that!!
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