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| Topic: Is it ok to be separated and date other people? | |
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I am legally separated....my divorce papers were filed years ago....... my ex and I live in separates states for years now.. file separate tax returns...... share nothing but our children and a piece of paper... Our reasons for not finalizing the divorce is a private choice, and the entire world is VERY clear that we will never reconcile or be together as a couple.
I have dated during the past couple of years... and I am currently in an exclusive relationship. I am "married" on paper ONLY. All of that being said... only YOU can decide what is right for you. 
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I won't date someone who is separated.. and after I have told men here that, they changed their profile to divorced so the next one would go for it...  long time no see :) good to see you again :) Im an honest person and I havent changed my profile and I wont change my profile. I just wanted to know what other people feel about dating when a persons separated and its clear I shouldnt be on here to date other people and most people probably wouldnt date me until im divorced anyway. Im already 99% certain my relationship is over anyway. I thank all of you for your replies. George |
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Edited by
Winx
on
Fri 08/21/09 09:35 PM
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I just keep second guessing myself. Its one of those things that i keep thinking? Am i ready? Is there someone really out there for me? Am I going to be alone the rest of my life? All these little thoughts come to my head and im not sure im the only one who is going through this situation. Me personally, I think its a good thing and im just posting a topic to see what other people think about it. George I've heard that people are ready when they don't think about the other person anymore. And...also divorced(my opinion). What you're going through is quite normal. We have to heal and go through the stages of grieving. We aren't any good for anybody else until we are done healing. It takes time to get to know ourselves again too. |
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This depends on where and how deep your morales run. Dating is usually considered a part of cortship and the beginning of itamacy. In my book this is imoral in that you convenant with God is still valid untill the marriage is anulled. Secondly, your decision to date is your choice some some woman might appreicate this especially if your are not honest with them in that some might think there may be a chance that you might go back to your wife.
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I won't date someone who is separated.. and after I have told men here that, they changed their profile to divorced so the next one would go for it... long time no see :) good to see you again :) Im an honest person and I havent changed my profile and I wont change my profile. I just wanted to know what other people feel about dating when a persons separated and its clear I shouldnt be on here to date other people and most people probably wouldnt date me until im divorced anyway. Im already 99% certain my relationship is over anyway. I thank all of you for your replies. George Why not wait to date until your 110% certain your relationship is over? |
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This depends on where and how deep your morales run. Dating is usually considered a part of cortship and the beginning of itamacy. In my book this is imoral in that you convenant with God is still valid untill the marriage is anulled. Secondly, your decision to date is your choice some some woman might appreicate this especially if your are not honest with them in that some might think there may be a chance that you might go back to your wife. I think honesty with anyone is a very good thing. Its good to have people trust you and know what your about. |
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I won't date someone who is separated.. and after I have told men here that, they changed their profile to divorced so the next one would go for it... long time no see :) good to see you again :) Im an honest person and I havent changed my profile and I wont change my profile. I just wanted to know what other people feel about dating when a persons separated and its clear I shouldnt be on here to date other people and most people probably wouldnt date me until im divorced anyway. Im already 99% certain my relationship is over anyway. I thank all of you for your replies. George Why not wait to date until your 110% certain your relationship is over? |
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the fact of the matter is i know my relationship is over with my wife and im lonely and I need someone there for companionship and to be a friend.
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This depends on where and how deep your morales run. Dating is usually considered a part of cortship and the beginning of itamacy. In my book this is imoral in that you convenant with God is still valid untill the marriage is anulled. Secondly, your decision to date is your choice some some woman might appreicate this especially if your are not honest with them in that some might think there may be a chance that you might go back to your wife. if love in a relationship is gone, a piece of paper means nothing, not even to your God.. It is a personal choice, as is everything. No one gets to pick morals for others, we all get to do that for ourselves. |
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This depends on where and how deep your morales run. Dating is usually considered a part of cortship and the beginning of itamacy. In my book this is imoral in that you convenant with God is still valid untill the marriage is anulled. Secondly, your decision to date is your choice some some woman might appreicate this especially if your are not honest with them in that some might think there may be a chance that you might go back to your wife. if love in a relationship is gone, a piece of paper means nothing, not even to your God.. It is a personal choice, as is everything. No one gets to pick morals for others, we all get to do that for ourselves. Tell them Nurse you tell them 
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I find this so funny!! People will say, "Oh we're married in every single way BUT that little piece of paper. We're completely committed to each other." NOW...it's "Oh, I'm divorced in every single way BUT that little piece of paper." Seems that little piece of paper is pretty important.
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Morals went out the window a long time ago with a lot of people it seems.
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Edited by
papersmile
on
Sat 08/22/09 12:13 PM
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I did it that way -- once the relationship was over and we were living away from each other, I saw no reason to put life on hold. Especially since she was dragging her feet about signing the divorce papers. i dated while i wasn't legally separated and we were still in the same house; we both had, however, admitted that the relationship was over and both went about living our own separate lives with no attempt, or desire, to reconcile. |
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I was married for eleven years, ive moved away from my wife. (she's in Minnesota and im in Florida. We have a mutual agreement that we can see others and it dont matter to us anymore. Even still is it morally ok to date someone else even though your just separated? I would like to hear from you on this. as long as you are honest with the people you date, I see no problem with it... morally? well, I guess the technical answer to that is no... but does it matter what others think? It's between you and the people you are dating... or between you and yourself if you are not being honest with them..... do you ask because you feel guilty? If so, perhaps take more time for yourself... my personal opinion is that men jump back in the pool a little too soon - more so than women (*ducks*)... p.s. sorry to hear about the demise of your marriage... no matter the circumstances - it's a big life adjustment on both sides... |
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just be real with yourself....
You are still married because it is more convenient than getting a divorce....Period |
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I find this so funny!! People will say, "Oh we're married in every single way BUT that little piece of paper. We're completely committed to each other." NOW...it's "Oh, I'm divorced in every single way BUT that little piece of paper." Seems that little piece of paper is pretty important. In court it is important, not with matters of the heart. I know some who have "shacked up" longer than most marriages last. Some can still be legally married and feel constantly alone..a marriage certificate serves no purpose then..except in court. |
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Marriage as an institution was devised in order to extract more out of people specially when they are younger and capable of producing more in terms of revenue. If unsure ask me in my "Simplicity" forum .
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My separation went on for two years and I made sure that when I was ready to start dating again, I made it clear that my marriage was completely over and there was no chance for us to get back together. It is a personal decision that you have to make, just be clear that the marriage is over and divorce papers are in the works. Good luck to you! I agree!! |
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This depends on where and how deep your morales run. Dating is usually considered a part of cortship and the beginning of itamacy. In my book this is imoral in that you convenant with God is still valid untill the marriage is anulled. Secondly, your decision to date is your choice some some woman might appreicate this especially if your are not honest with them in that some might think there may be a chance that you might go back to your wife. if love in a relationship is gone, a piece of paper means nothing, not even to your God.. It is a personal choice, as is everything. No one gets to pick morals for others, we all get to do that for ourselves. actually I would think that piece of paper means legally you are still responsible for each other.. there may be no love... but legally, you are still involved, it's not over til the divorce is final... |
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This depends on where and how deep your morales run. Dating is usually considered a part of cortship and the beginning of itamacy. In my book this is imoral in that you convenant with God is still valid untill the marriage is anulled. Secondly, your decision to date is your choice some some woman might appreicate this especially if your are not honest with them in that some might think there may be a chance that you might go back to your wife. if love in a relationship is gone, a piece of paper means nothing, not even to your God.. It is a personal choice, as is everything. No one gets to pick morals for others, we all get to do that for ourselves. actually I would think that piece of paper means legally you are still responsible for each other.. there may be no love... but legally, you are still involved, it's not over til the divorce is final... only responsible for the children that are created during the union... 2 adults can walk away and not be responsible for each other, were all responsible for ourselves. The piece of paper is only important in legal matters, not morally.. |
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