No one knows this for sure, but a woman herself. I myself have tried everything that I know, but it has always been the wrong thing. Lets just say that you try to do something nice or romantic for her, well that is where you have done something wrong. She will think you have done something wrong or cheated on her, and then question things that you do. Ok - here are some things I have tried in my past with women, and you can tell me what I did wrong? These are just a few things that I thought would help a relationship, but it turned out wrong.

1. Just say that she came in from a hard day,but you got to the house before her & thought you would do something nice for her. So you send the kid to the babysitter, and you fix her a nice dinner and set it to candle light.

2.She may go out to a party or the club,so you want to add some spark to things. Well you set up something fun and try to make it something she will never forget.So you leave a note on the door that leads her to another note somewhere in the house.-
(you can all see where this is headed) So the last note leads her to the bedroom where you have left rose petals all over the bed.

3.She had a bad day at work, and is just so up tight from the day she had. So you run her a hot bath, and try to relax her for a bit. Here is where you start with just a good oldfashion foot rub, and work your way into trying to make her feel better. ( I know what some people would think, but she has got to be first,)Now you work on her calf muscles, then the back of her thighs. Keep going all the way, until you have worked on her back and shoulders. Relax her from head to toe, but be sure to listen to her and watch her body movements. because she is the only one, who can let you know how she feels.


Maybe I have always been wrong, but I have always thought that a woman-lady only wanted to be Loved and treated with respect.I know that they are not just looking for sex,or just a rich guy to pay for something that doesn't last.


OK ,here is how some of it turned out.

On #1- I was acused of seeing someone else.

On #2- It was that I was screwing someone else.

and #3-It was that I must be cheating on her.



So ladies please let me know where I went wrong ?

And guys well, just think about it before you act on it.

Did you ask her how she arrived at those assumptions?

You are asking us to provide a reasonable explanation into how an individual woman thought, within an individual situation.

She can answer these questions....not us.

Wow..sounds like you did alot of nice things.

In each scenario.... you have described...what was your motive?

What were you going to get out of it?

What was your agenda?

you had women that didn't appreciate the things you did for them

Quit picking those women, or stop doing what you do and continue picking those women...really, not that difficult...

I have to ask were these 3 scenerios with the same lady or 3 different women over a weekend?

They were ALL very nice gestures. I hope that there were no motives behind any of them...except pleasing the one you were with.

I have to ask the same question:

Is this the SAME woman or three different ones????

You answered your own question in the first six words of your OP. The trick for men and women alike is to listen to what your intended/partner is telling you. There's no cookie cutter right and wrong. If there was, that would be so dang boring!

I agree with myteemouse.

Yes It was with just one woman, and that would be because the way I was raised. Old school- by my Grandfather. He taught me when you are with someone and you love them, you will do everything to make them happy.I always do things like that to be nice, and because I like doing them. There is never a motive behind what I do for them, it's simply out of Love and respect.

for me, that would be coddling or stiffling.

i don't mind a bit of a display and pampering, but mostly i'd feel as though you were making me not able to breathe.

if i have a bad day at work, i'd rather just be left alone for a few minutes when i got home.

we're all different and not every woman likes the same things at the same time.

You were with a paranoid schitzo?

Honestly, from my POV, those would have all been very nice. It was her issue, babe, not yours.

Next time find out what they want from a guy in each of these situations; I agree with papersmile- when I'm tired and cranky, I want to be left alone. I don't anyone in my face bothering me, no matter how well-intentioned it is. I used to have a friend who said when she got home in the evening after work, her bf and the two dogs would be waiting for her in the doorway. That would drive me mad, but she liked it. So it depends on who you're dealing with. And yeah, next time pick different women who are into pampering and who aren't suspicious.

in answer to the op's question in the topic - my point exactly!

Were were you 27yrs ago... when i did the same thing and yet... I was not appreciated for anything I did..

well hat's off to you and don't stop just because one dose not or two or three..

Perseverance is the key to a women heart.. she just might not have be a spontaneous women..

most say they want this and yet they hate it...

next time if your still with this chick..

1. don't do anything with out her permission. don't even go to the bathroom she might think your hiding a women in the toilet...

2. check with her before you put on your aftershave for she might feel intimidated and think your going to get the new paper an flirt with the post women... all because you wanted to take a shower and smell good for your lady.

3. make sure before you plan anything, you have the time, date, the second to what time she will be ready to have her spontaneous reaction so you can be surprised by her!

Last result... get rid of her... and Sweep me off my feet and take me away for the rest of my life.....

P.s. no kids allowed.... o dang I'm a lesbian! Umm can you dress up like a women in the bedroom>>>>>>> lol

you really are silly!!