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Topic: need some guidance
bgeez21's photo
Wed 07/29/09 03:35 PM
Met someone really special on here and began to talk and make plans to meet via flights to one another's hometowns. Fell in love with the girl we connect on soo many levels and everything was flying high. A sudden health problem occurred in her family involving immediate care and I understand fully. We postponed the plans to meet so she could deal with the unfortunate situation. I have total respect for her wishes to spend time with her family during this duration, but being her boyfriend as we have made it official, I told her I am here for her and whenever she needs me call and I'll do anything I can. That said, I have sent her messages everyday for the past 6 days letting her know I'm praying for her and her family and just seeing how she is doing... no response back, left a voicemail last night just to hopefully cheer her up and nothing in return. I understand the stress of her situation, but can I get something back as a phone call or text to lemme know how things are going? Being her boyfriend I feel helpless and lost because I have no direction and no hint as to what to do and how she's doing. Someone experience this or can help please? Thank u!


no photo
Wed 07/29/09 03:37 PM
u can be the 'boyfriend' of someone u haven't met?

no photo
Wed 07/29/09 03:40 PM
Maybe, as her boyfriend, you can be patient and wait for her to get back to you? If her situation is as grave as you say, she's totally involved in that, and hasn't really been thinking about returning calls or emails or whatever. If she's as into you as you seem to be into her, she's not "ignoring" you, she's busy. Give her time and space. Otherwise, she'll feel overwhelmed and stressed out possibly annoyed with you for being the cause of that. Just calm down, take a deep breath, and go do something you enjoy. She'll contact you when she can.flowerforyou

no photo
Wed 07/29/09 03:40 PM

u can be the 'boyfriend' of someone u haven't met?


Some people do that, they call it an "online relationship.":wink:

bgeez21's photo
Wed 07/29/09 03:41 PM
thanks a lot i really appreciate that comment Calleigh.

no photo
Wed 07/29/09 03:42 PM


u can be the 'boyfriend' of someone u haven't met?


Some people do that, they call it an "online relationship.":wink:


Nooooooooooooooooooooo? scared

no photo
Wed 07/29/09 03:43 PM

thanks a lot i really appreciate that comment Calleigh.


you're welcome. congrats on finding someone you connect with.flowerforyou

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Wed 07/29/09 03:43 PM



u can be the 'boyfriend' of someone u haven't met?


Some people do that, they call it an "online relationship.":wink:


Nooooooooooooooooooooo? scared


laugh laugh laugh :tongue:

crzylady55's photo
Wed 07/29/09 03:43 PM
Could be wrong, but I am seeing big red flags here

no photo
Wed 07/29/09 03:43 PM
however i think that 6 days during a difficult time for her is not a long time, be patient flowerforyou

newarkjw's photo
Wed 07/29/09 03:44 PM

Met someone really special on here and began to talk and make plans to meet via flights to one another's hometowns. Fell in love with the girl we connect on soo many levels and everything was flying high. A sudden health problem occurred in her family involving immediate care and I understand fully. We postponed the plans to meet so she could deal with the unfortunate situation. I have total respect for her wishes to spend time with her family during this duration, but being her boyfriend as we have made it official, I told her I am here for her and whenever she needs me call and I'll do anything I can. That said, I have sent her messages everyday for the past 6 days letting her know I'm praying for her and her family and just seeing how she is doing... no response back, left a voicemail last night just to hopefully cheer her up and nothing in return. I understand the stress of her situation, but can I get something back as a phone call or text to lemme know how things are going? Being her boyfriend I feel helpless and lost because I have no direction and no hint as to what to do and how she's doing. Someone experience this or can help please? Thank u!





Just give her some space bro. It will be cool. smokin

bgeez21's photo
Wed 07/29/09 03:48 PM
thanks for the comments.. im curious to see why the girl thinks shes seeing big red flags... I've thought about that scenario too..

PacificStar48's photo
Wed 07/29/09 03:52 PM
Having just lost a close family member recently I have had a couple people express interest and I just don't have the emotional energy to really respond. Don't know about your lady friend but if she is in mourning it might not seem respectful to her family to be social.

no photo
Wed 07/29/09 03:52 PM

thanks for the comments.. im curious to see why the girl thinks shes seeing big red flags... I've thought about that scenario too..


Eh, I wouldn't worry about that too much. I've been in situations where I literally couldn't get back to people, for a variety of reasons. I still say give her some time. There's nothing some people hate more than the idea of someone being pushy or clingy, however well-intentioned.

mcgilvrey21's photo
Wed 07/29/09 03:59 PM

Could be wrong, but I am seeing big red flags here


I agree here too. I think there are some red flags. If she cared about you as much as she says she does, she would have contacted you to let you know she is okay. I mean, I know I would have. At least an email, a text message, something. In this day and age there really is no excuse for not keeping contact. yes, she may be immersed in her family tragedy but, she needs to keep in mind you have feelings too and care about her well being. So, its up to you. Trust your heart most of all, but know that from a girl, Im seeing signs of her ditching you with out giving real reason. But thats just me.

myteemouse's photo
Wed 07/29/09 04:20 PM

u can be the 'boyfriend' of someone u haven't met?

That was the first thought that popped into my head. The second one, quite frankly, was...."doormat."

Trust me, when folks are going through family medical issues, they do their best to keep the folks they care about apprised. My gut says this is a brush-off and a tacky one...using health issues as an excuse.

I don't care what level the relationship has reached...you are entitled to a text, phone call, email within the time frame mentioned. Brush this one off your feet and move on.

Dan99's photo
Wed 07/29/09 04:23 PM
OH the 'family emergency/bereavement' scenario..

Dont fall for it. She just doesnt want anything to do with you. Sorry.


no photo
Wed 07/29/09 04:24 PM

OH the 'family emergency/bereavement' scenario..

Dont fall for it. She just doesnt want anything to do with you. Sorry.




oh well, god has spoken.:wink:

myteemouse's photo
Wed 07/29/09 04:24 PM

OH the 'family emergency/bereavement' scenario..

Dont fall for it. She just doesnt want anything to do with you. Sorry.



Oh my gawd! Dan agrees with me! That pretty much makes it gospel, Hon...sorry!

no photo
Wed 07/29/09 04:25 PM
yes but there is more to it so i'm inclined to agree it's a real low brush off.

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