Dearest Clever Clive I see that once again you have saved the day…Long would be the waiting if it weren’t for your devious heart and mind..Again, I have fallen under your spell of bewitchment, you are such a busy fellow, even for a deviant…Are you sure you aren’t cloned?? Will it be yourself that meets me in the light of the midnight moon by the shores of Lustbegonetomoreus? Or will it be a shadow of you? I urgently need it to be your ownself..I anxiously await your bands of steel to wrap themselves around my exquisite form. The chalice of my nectar begs for your lips. Those enticing lips that suck the breath from my body.
Bring with you double doses of the toiletries for me to secretly place in their medicine chests, for I have kept their allegiance for just such an occasion.
I have broken all bonds with the my past lovers, it is you I shall have as my own. Together we will send our love child to the new school of Hardknocks where she will learn to be as devious as we are. She Shall make us proud and spend all our ill gotten gains!
Now we can carry out our plan to deliver the long overdue booty to Horiracial the Horrible. He has so many plans for the coinage Lady Deedee will bring in as she

as she sharpens her marketing skills by opening up her third drive through peyote shake shack... How cruel she is to the once noble Horiracial. Making him stand in front of that delapidated old building all dressed up in that fuzzy greyish green Pepe Peyote costume and waving at all the passers by...

No worries! Ladydeedee will get her money soon enough! I have heard it rumoured that she and the notorious Lady Bett's are finalizing a deal to run her shake shack ads during Bett's new TV reality show, 'Thirty-Five Ain't Enough For Bett's-n-Clive'... This mind altering dilemma might delay our plans since I've signed a five year contract to make guest appearances and delve out puppy punishment whenever there is a need. I fear that Bett's may want more from me than a wagging tail or a casual licking though...

BUT for now let's focus on the matter at hand... our romantic interlude beside the still waters of Kracklewackledoo... Look for the shadow of a bull moose behind the Gate of Nu'poo... Underneath the bountiful yucca palms I shall be... Hook, line, and sinker

Clive!! Help!! I made my way to the shores of the Kracklewackledoo and found the shadow of the bull moose...now he's chasing me!! Help!

oh you silly wench Buffy Muff ...you shall fall for anything!It is I lady Betts and 24 0f my fierce woman eating offspring, who are chasing you!They were trained by their Daddy Clive himself.
Clive is standing back so proud of his vicious little meateaters and is filiming this for our reality show. .The first episode will be named Betts and Clive and 35 eat Muffy Buff alive!

Yes, I admit to my fooly...but your greedy little meateaters only got a taste of my bumm..and it was laced with most powerful poison known to meateaters...eycolialoa...they will not be tasting protien for quite some time.
My new Femfatal' in twenty weeks...the ratings are already putting yours into the slammer.Clive will see his mistake and come running to me as our love child has escaped from her Schoolofhardknocks and has joined her perfect mamama' in this new venture. We'll see who gets the Golden Man and the most Clever of ALL!

oh yeah Missy muffy. I just got back from the groomer .I had a flea and tick bath ,my toenails cut and a brand new sexy haircut. I have one ear long and the other short just to make it exciting for my darling Clive.
It doesn't matter if you killed the offspring with your poison , as there is 11 more on the way the .and Clive wil not stop mating with me as long as I continue the breeding process. He loves my big fat belly. Not a skinny wench like you!He will never be yours never I say never!

What a diabolical dilemma we have here! A pregnantly plump pole dancing pup in one arm and a graceful gazelle with an arse chocked full of poison in the other!... AND both having been blessed with their very own TV reality shows. Well, if the Bunkers, the Findleys, and the Jeffersons could do it then, why can't I be a co-star for you both now. Could we not all agree upon some mutually appeasing filming schedule? Like MWF with my sweet lovely Muffikins and TuThSa with my furry, yet very well groomed and pedicured, sultry puppies mama, Lady Betts... AND leave me to my own on Su for rest, fertility treatments, and lotsa stomach pumping?

Beautiful Muffy, my buffiest of Muffindom, I wish that you hadn't unleashed your secret weapon upon my fuzzy little Muffin hungry offspring, but I totally understand why you found it necessary to do so. I wish no harm for you, for you are, and will always be, my most deliciously sweet after dinner treat. Our legs have entangled to often and our arms have embraced to tightly to shuffle our heated flame of passion off to Toronto. Whenever a sparkle doeth glitter in my eye, it is in honour of your most heavenly goddess-like form which I have held so close for so many years as we continue trying to conceive our very own quartet of rock-n-roll love children. Our one and only, Gwen of Kantsay-no will straighten up her arched back act one day btw and eventually dance to the beat of her future sibling's drums

AND faire Betts, Lady of Kay-nine, you know that I shall never be able to resist your cold wet nose, your shapely pair of legs twice-fold, your fuzzy little belly, and your eight supple mouth-watering teats aligned in two sumptuous rows... Tawdry as this may seem, my coconut seeds shall continue to fall upon your rich loamy ground for it is your naughty tail-wagging way that doeth smitten me... AND you are as fertile as the Nile Valley according to the Pharaoh Mulahnktunk the III of West Nebuchadnezzar and his wild pack of hunting hounds... and the palace guards... that trio of one-eyed eunuch twins... ohhhh and Laranya-da-zallah, the senior harem fashion coordinator and part time hashish distributor...

So can't we just get along with each other, Muffy and Lady Bett's? Couldn't we consolidate, together, our amassed TV network fortunes and buy an evil castle (with a large kennel, 40 baths, a conservatory, and a laboratory) on some windswept hill overlooking the deep purple lava sand beaches of Malicaribou? AND why shouldn't we combine our forces and form a most powerful alliance based on vile treachery, searing sensuality, wiccan wickedness, the corruption of youth, tagging private property, and loose morals? Why with such an amazing three-pronged force such as this, we could kick everyone's arse in a fortnight and soon dominate the world...

I bow to your wishes Dear Dear Clive...for you I will forgive all the treachery Betts, ((as I do feel soory for her having to nurse all those offspring, all the time, day in day out night after night after night day after day....Lord, why can't someone tell her about the wonderful new medical proceedure of HAVINGHERSELFFIXED!!!Pray tell? ))that she has greviously heaped upon me...
Yes, I will Share you...if I must.
I am anxiously awaiting the first episode of our new TV series...
(( But I already know that ours will be the best))

Well I get him on Bingo night ok?

We shall surely win an emmy for our stellar performance together, Muffilicious One... AND you will always be the best in my crossed eyes... Have you your gold breastplate of myrhh near? Look for a secret pocket behind the left plate and there you will find a bottle of pups-no-more... three drops, no more-no less... place three drops in Bett's dish at supper and her incredible 'hunger' shall fade away like Charlie Chaplin's character, The Little Tramp, as he wanders off in the total eclipse of the heart-shaped moon of Tralfamador... Then you and I may make merry 24/7 and still be able to conquer the known world...

so my darling Clive are you saying you don't love me anymore and you want Muffy and only muffy?Is that your true wish?

On the night of bingo, dear Lady Betts, you may ink my number until the marmosets come back to their spartanly-furnished flats on the cheatin' side of town...

Ummmm It's not the box, wrapped in white satin and laced and well-ribboned with the shiniest threads of gold, that I detest, Lady B, it's the tender young furry trinkets that, once released, pee pee on my flying carpet collection and chew on my wooden leg... That's what flibbert's my gibbert!... I'll make out with you anytime (particularly on Tu,Th,Sa)... BUT NO hanky-panky until you eat your yummy supper! Mmmmmm yummy yummy

I no longer trust you my dearest Clive. I have given you 35 of my best pups and you only want Muffy , who really never gave you anything. That daughter is not yours .Muffy is a trollop through and through .She is trying to capture you and bring you to the pound with all the rest of the wayward canines around. However so be it !
I shall find another males kennel to spawn in .
Goodbye my shaggy love goodbye!

Oh Betts dear....it's din din time!!

no no Muffy you do not have to do Clives dirty work for him anymore.
I will no longer fight you for him , he is yours now all yours!

What have you people done to my story thread?

Just writing a story....it's a lot of fun...
Want to join us???

I love the story. It's amazing the words that pour from your soul. It touches me deeply, and I'm strangly aroused! I would love to join in, but don't want to ruin it.

o h come on be brave ...you can do it!