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Topic: What's a real man/woman to you?
no photo
Sun 05/10/09 02:00 PM
Edited by heathersaysgobucks on Sun 05/10/09 02:34 PM
Some thoughts spurred on by another thread. (thanks atlantis)
I'd love to hear both sides of this.

What's your idea of the core of a man/woman committed relationship? I'm not talking just financial here.

Are you into the newer type roles where everything is split 50/50 (or even where the man stays home and the woman works) or do you like the traditional roles of a household.

If you could have your ideal set-up....how would that look?


galendgirl's photo
Sun 05/10/09 02:03 PM
I think that every relationship is going to be different so a "formula" doesn't really work. I do think the 50/50 ideal is pure crap, though...it takes 2 people giving as close to 100% as possible (because no one can be at their full best all the time) to make a relationship work.

I guess if I ever have the opportunity, I'll test my math saavy.

Thanks, H!

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Sun 05/10/09 02:07 PM
I, IMHO, think that the extreme feminist push has kind of brainwashed women into thinking it's no longer ok to have a traditional type of relationship where the man is allowed to be the king of his castle. In return, he is expected to be a provider (to some degree) and feel good about caring for his family.

I won't be in a committed relationship with someone who appears unable to take on what I see as the "real man" role. I work, I contribute.......but I want someone who really cares about making his family feel safe and secure, no matter what the economic times are. That kind of guy would do whatever type jobs he had to, in order to feed his family. Yes, it's a 50/50 partnership.....but I won't take away his self worth by making him feel less a man. Call me old fashioned I guess. My dad taught me what a real man looks like, and I'm not stopping until I get one like that.

no photo
Sun 05/10/09 02:09 PM

I think that every relationship is going to be different so a "formula" doesn't really work. I do think the 50/50 ideal is pure crap, though...it takes 2 people giving as close to 100% as possible (because no one can be at their full best all the time) to make a relationship work.

I guess if I ever have the opportunity, I'll test my math saavy.

Thanks, H!


Each giving 100% sounds great. And picking up slack where it is needed.

I still need to feel like a woman though. It's just how I was raised.

Gossipmpm's photo
Sun 05/10/09 02:10 PM
My idea of a real man is one who will just let me be me quirks and all! And I do honestly love a smart kinda what society calls a nerdy man! There is no man that fits my qualifications so no more men for me!!

Enough said

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Sun 05/10/09 02:11 PM

My idea of a real man is one who will just let me be me quirks and all! And I do honestly love a smart kinda what society calls a nerdy man! There is no man that fits my qualifications so no more men for me!!

Enough said


Nerdy men.......yeah baby!.....flowerforyou

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Sun 05/10/09 02:15 PM
Do men even like being king of the castle anymore?....ohwell

galendgirl's photo
Sun 05/10/09 02:16 PM


I think that every relationship is going to be different so a "formula" doesn't really work. I do think the 50/50 ideal is pure crap, though...it takes 2 people giving as close to 100% as possible (because no one can be at their full best all the time) to make a relationship work.

I guess if I ever have the opportunity, I'll test my math saavy.

Thanks, H!


Each giving 100% sounds great. And picking up slack where it is needed.

I still need to feel like a woman though. It's just how I was raised.


Yep...it's not about roles. If I hadn't had to be the only provider and parent for 18 years, I could have been happy too. Whatever roles "fit" a relationship are fine - again, probably no set formula. Whatever a couple chooses, it still takes more than half best effort.

MirrorMirror's photo
Sun 05/10/09 02:19 PM
flowerforyou As long as she doesn't cheat on me or act mean and hateful all the time then the rest is negotiable.flowerforyou

no photo
Sun 05/10/09 02:21 PM

flowerforyou As long as she doesn't cheat on me or act mean and hateful all the time then the rest is negotiable.flowerforyou


flowerforyou

galendgirl's photo
Sun 05/10/09 02:28 PM

flowerforyou As long as she doesn't cheat on me or act mean and hateful all the time then the rest is negotiable.flowerforyou


...and you aren't taken because????

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Sun 05/10/09 02:32 PM


flowerforyou As long as she doesn't cheat on me or act mean and hateful all the time then the rest is negotiable.flowerforyou


...and you aren't taken because????


There's a question......is he taken or isn't he?......laugh

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Sun 05/10/09 02:37 PM
Recently had the opportunity to go out with someone who opened doors and was solicitous and made me feel sooooo womanly. God, that was great!

misstina2's photo
Sun 05/10/09 02:39 PM
:tongue:

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Sun 05/10/09 02:40 PM

:tongue:


laugh Hi Tina!!

misstina2's photo
Sun 05/10/09 02:45 PM


:tongue:


laugh Hi Tina!!
to answer the question at hand:tongue: an ideal situation would be 2 people working as a team supporting each others goalsflowerforyou and for Mirror he's playing hard to get:tongue:

galendgirl's photo
Sun 05/10/09 02:46 PM

Recently had the opportunity to go out with someone who opened doors and was solicitous and made me feel sooooo womanly. God, that was great!


VERY nice...I'm glad you had a good time and I hope you get to do it again soon!

no photo
Sun 05/10/09 03:03 PM



:tongue:


laugh Hi Tina!!
to answer the question at hand:tongue: an ideal situation would be 2 people working as a team supporting each others goalsflowerforyou and for Mirror he's playing hard to get:tongue:


Supporting each others goals....well said.

IndnPrncs's photo
Sun 05/10/09 03:18 PM
I think you're all right... We all may need different things.. I am so tired of all these threads about what is wrong with women and why we can't find relationships, etc. I can't find one b/c I don't want one.. Regardless of what my expectations are, obviously I'm not finding anyone that meets them... He can be rich and not kind, sorry no go.. he can be poor and not kind, again no go... He can be rich or poor and not be there for me when I need a rock and that's a no go... I rarely need anything BUT I will not accept less than I want no matter what anyone says that means about me.. I am fine alone, I don't need to be loved or in a relationship if it means I have to settle for less than I want or will give... I have wonderful friends and if that's all that's meant for me in this life, I'm perfectly content with that... Don't get me wrong some days I have a down day and doubt my stance but 98% of the time I never question it and I'm fine with it...

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Sun 05/10/09 03:23 PM

I think you're all right... We all may need different things.. I am so tired of all these threads about what is wrong with women and why we can't find relationships, etc. I can't find one b/c I don't want one.. Regardless of what my expectations are, obviously I'm not finding anyone that meets them... He can be rich and not kind, sorry no go.. he can be poor and not kind, again no go... He can be rich or poor and not be there for me when I need a rock and that's a no go... I rarely need anything BUT I will not accept less than I want no matter what anyone says that means about me.. I am fine alone, I don't need to be loved or in a relationship if it means I have to settle for less than I want or will give... I have wonderful friends and if that's all that's meant for me in this life, I'm perfectly content with that... Don't get me wrong some days I have a down day and doubt my stance but 98% of the time I never question it and I'm fine with it...


Thank you for replying. You are a strong woman and know what you want. So many people are afraid to actually have an opinion. I'm with you, if I don't find it, I'll just be alone. Settling for something other than what I want is emotional suicide.

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