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| Topic: rules to boozing | |
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For every drink, there is a five percent better chance you will get in a fight. There is also a three percent better chance you will lose the fight.
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My rules for drinking;
Make sure your pants are completely fastened and no TP is attached to your person before leaving the restroom. Make sure a guy is not already with someone BEFORE you buy him a drink. Don't hand your purse to the alcoholic in the group. |
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For every drink, there is a five percent better chance you will get in a fight. There is also a three percent better chance you will lose the fight. Or you could accidentally walk into a handicap post and well split your face open.. imaging telling that story at the hospital?? The irony would have them on the floor in tears... 
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Always bring someone to hold your hair back while you puke Just and ONLY for that reason 
I'd like to say "that's a good reason to keep your hair short" but I can't claim to be that sophisticated (OOPS! Thread jumping!) Been lucky to have it short The times that that happened to me  
Clearly, I don't go out enough... Trust me ... It's been a WHILE for me |
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My rules for drinking; Make sure your pants are completely fastened and no TP is attached to your person before leaving the restroom. Make sure a guy is not already with someone BEFORE you buy him a drink. Don't hand your purse to the alcoholic in the group. amen |
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never drink in a hoodie. you will eventually think someone is following you all the time.
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My rules for drinking; Make sure your pants are completely fastened and no TP is attached to your person before leaving the restroom. Make sure a guy is not already with someone BEFORE you buy him a drink. Don't hand your purse to the alcoholic in the group. Those are good rules
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Asking a bartender what beers are on tap when the handles are right in front of you is the equivalent of saying, “I'm an idiot"
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My rules for drinking; Make sure your pants are completely fastened and no TP is attached to your person before leaving the restroom. Make sure a guy is not already with someone BEFORE you buy him a drink. Don't hand your purse to the alcoholic in the group.  good rules....
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Make sure if everyone is drunk outta their skulls
Not to start arguing on who should drive Cuz ya know NOONE should drive
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and it's not a party until some lady is dancing on the pool table topless !
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and it's not a party until some lady is dancing on the pool table topless !
as long as its not me....too embarrassing
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Edited by
Lilypetal
on
Sat 05/02/09 08:31 PM
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and it's not a party until some lady is dancing on the pool table topless !
I used to hang out with a girl who was that lady. Also the inspiration for rule #3.
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damn, i miss every thing !
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Uh-oh...
I retract my earlier diatribe about rules not applying to "at home" drinking. There probably SHOULD be a rule about drinking at home and typing. It might go along with the "you should eat dinner" rule, but I'm too late for either, apparently. From here on out, typos are not to be commented on... |
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Beer makes you mellow, champagne makes you silly, wine makes you dramatic, tequila makes you felonious
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and it's not a party until some lady is dancing on the pool table topless !
I have done that but not topless
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tequila makes you felonious nah, bourbon makes you felonious. get drunk on that and you are liable to punch out a priest. tequila makes your inhibitions drop faster than clevelands temperature in the fall. |
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Beer makes you mellow, champagne makes you silly, wine makes you dramatic, tequila makes you felonious I won't tell you what Amaretto does 
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damn, i miss every thing !
I feel left out too Chevy 
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