I was thinking about my future marriage just this morning. Well, I was in a round-about way. At the center of my thoughts were my goals. My entire life I have been striving for something or towards an ultimate ending and have always believed that with applied hard work most things can be achieved. No, my journey hasn’t been smooth or ideal (I mean I should have my PhD by now, lol), but look at what I have accomplished; consider the promotions I have taken at EVERY job, the money I made at a young age, having my own car, house, apartment. .. All attained by goal-oriented hard work—sweat and blood. Today my sights are set on my degree. Doubling up on these ridiculous science classes isn’t easy; it’s a lot of hard work, but it is what I need to do to get what I want, grow stronger, become the man I want to be.

I was telling God that finding a relationship is different. I can have the *goal* of settling down and getting married, but how does one go about that? Sure, there are certain things one can do to look more attractive or be more presentable, but I can’t “sweat and bleed” myself a man. No amount of hard work or having goals is going to materialize a husband.

This is what was given to me: Obtaining a spouse and kids isn’t a goal. They are things that will happen naturally—naturally while living in the present. Although I’ve always been driven my clear pictures of what I think my future is supposed to look like, I truly don’t know what the Lord has for me; therefore, while striving, sweating, and bleeding I must not forget to live for today—in the now. Thinking about this made me realize how often I have my sights set on the future when I don’t even know if there is going to be a future. Also, lately I’ve forgotten to be happy. That sounds silly, I know, but I truly have fallen back into my old ways of thinking, “I will be happy when I get my degree, when this next goal is achieved.” Well, this morning I decided to be happy now and take joy in every day that God gives me.

At least you got time to think

We can choose our steps but it is God who directs our paths.
His plan for you is perfect but you have to trust that he will lead you to that plan just by letting go and not trying to do it yourself.
Im a high achiever as well and the hardest thing for me is accepting the fact that sometimes he wants me to stop trying and just wait on him!
Its hard but your future is worth it! Be blessed....

Wow Donaven! I read what you had to say and it's seems like something so similar to what I'm going through.
I just got out of a relationship-his feelings "just changed" and I realized that we are totally different people and will never be on the same page. So in talking to a different ex, who I have remained friends with, I found out him and, what seems like, every other guy that I am friends with now has a girlfriend. Matters aren't helped much when one of my best friends is engaged and getting married in a year (I live vicariously through her. :-) )
I am a college student, going through some anxiety about this whole "meeting 'the one'" ordeal. The girls I live with all have their boyfriends and I'm newly single and am having issues dealing with it at times. Last night I was studying in the library and had this revelation--I need to stop worrying about that and other people and concentrate on my education and future career, especially when I am in a very difficult program. I need to remember who (God, family and true friends) and what (my education) matters most and let God. Let God worry about the rest for me.
Very insightful...I should go study now. :-)
Best of luck with everything!
God Bless and God's Love