This guy sent me a teddy bear with godiva chocolates, a dozen roses (half red half pin) with a real crystal vase, and gourmet chocolate dipped strawberries. Theres no chance of him getting lucky because he is overseas fighting in the war.
I have been writing, emailing, sending cards and care packages to him. An I was wondering why he would send me such expensive gifts? He said it was to show his apperciation for all I have done for him. Yet wouldn't the teddy bear be enough. I thought it was got the teddy bear on the 11th, then got the roses with the vase and chocolates the next day an was like OMG!!. So I was wondering why would a guy go to such extremes to show his apperciation? Or am I missing something, is he developing feelings for me and this is his way of telling me. He mentioned in Jan his buddies were asking him if something was going on with us, because of all the mail and packages he gets.
So any advice would be apperciated.
I care for him alot and would not want to risk our friendship to ask him if he was developing feelings for me only to find out he wasn't. So you can see I am in a pickle? So please let me know what you all think. An I checked the prices from the website he ordered from and lets just say he spent almost 200.00 on me.
So guys would you spend that much on a woman just to show her how much you apperciated her?
Ladies what do you think? I need advice

runnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

he is trying to buy you

please go away from him


please please listen fast.....

thats a tough one it could be one or both i do know guys that serve over sees that is the one thing they really and truly look forward to is mail call just to keep a slight tenuous latch on home

Maybe he has developed feelings for you. Who knows. Just appreciate the sentiment because maybe that is just how he is.

Some of us men are die hard romantics.

Also he is over seas and probably trying to hold on to some piece of home vicariously to help him keep his sanity. If he is over seas then chances are he is stuck in the arm pit of the middle east and at least from MY perspective I would be wanting to go home badly because it is a very different way of life there. I would hope to be in contact with family or friends to remind me of why i am where I am and why I need to make it back. But that's just ME.

Sounds to me like he does like you at least as a friend. You might be looking into this too much. Ask him and see what he says. You can at least do that with him can't you???

Duh, the guy is overseas, lonely and you have been nice to him. Anybody in that situation is going to develop some type of emotional attachment. He does appreciate all you have done for him. Just don't lead the poor fellow on.

This will probably get my ass chewed... but..........


this is one thing I dont understand abouot alot of women... ya ***** if he does, ya ***** if he doesnt!!!

Just be thankful for his thoughtfulness... Maybe he has wondered the same of you for the things you have done for him?????

Isn't that just a tad on the cold side???? In today's economy $200 isn't SQUAT.

Besides, women sell themselves all the time for security, flash, and wealth all the time. In LA the image and the wallet bulge make a huge difference in dating.

Valentines Day is a painful reminder of that to a lot of us men and women.

If the guy was not a soldier I would see the gifts as a little over done but then again try getting sent to war and see what it does to your head. Men in stressful situations do strange things to cope. Wondering if you are going to get blown up or make it home I think can be pretty stressful. How about you??

I would never lead a guy on, never have and never will, I am the one if a relationship is not going to work I will end it instead of dragging it out.

Yeah I might be reading too much into this, and he is just that way a geniune person. I might write him tonight and ask him why he went to such extremes. That I can do, and I know he won't take it personally. He already knows how much I apperciate the gifts cause I told him how much I apperciated them and him.

sorry you are right but it has been my experiance when it comes to money and gifts you dont get something for nothing and then they keep reminding you..."i bought you this" then they keep tabs it is like a business dealll... some people buy people because they do not know anyother way to express things i guess..

but you could be right...

Hear this all the time from you women... sheese... I did some home renovations for a lady I was friends with over the last 6 months.. And I did it because I wanted to I enjoyed her friendship.. She appreciated it also.. so whats the big deal with him sending you this stuff.. What about all you do to give his world a little of home and maybe brighten his day. Look at how the guys around him react.. They are attching themselves to him why? because you cared enough to be someone a connection to the outside world.. I say enjoy and wait till he gets home to findd out anything else.

That is a stressful situation over there for all of our military not just the men. An hearing from someone back state sides is the only pleasure they get. So just because I might have read the situation wrong does not mean I don't know what the heck they are going through. I know, everytime I hear about a soldier getting killed I worry. So don't you dare think I don't think about that.

I am sorry if I went off, I asked for advice and I got it, I was reading things as if he were homeside. hes a friend who apperciates what I have done. So I am taking that as that a friend who just went a little over board but done it because he cares.

and besides this is the internet... this guy could be buying tons of girls gifts... i dont know... it sucks

i just think it is kind of slimy sometimes

You shouldnt question or analyze his intentions. Just accept and appreciate that he is showing some sort of affection.

Unless he is coming off as too "nice" for you. In that case send the gifts back and break it off.

You are VERY right to tend towards caution!


Too many manipulative slime bags out there.


I also have fear of surprise gifts out of the blue and i also am very suspicious of anything "free" or "from the heart" by strangers.


So many strings that bind ya know!!!!!!

Ummm...I hate to be the one to completely disagree ( well..actually I don't mind it ) but Thursday night, I took a woman out on our first date.

Between dinner, event tickets, gas money to get to her place ( which is 3 hours from my house ) concert t's and beverages, I spent right around 150 bucks.

Wasn't looking to BUY anything from her. I just wanted our first date to be memorable for her.

The guy the OP is talking about is overseas, in a war zone. He very well COULD have been just trying to show how much he appreciates what she does for him. Ask any soldier about how he felt when he received care packages from someone back home. They appreciate those little things more than anyone knows.

Nice, Pats.....lol

If you are such good friends you should be able to ask him.

I did, he said that we are friends an he wanted me to know exactly how much he apperciated everything. Said I should have seen the stuff he sent to his mom. Which means hes just a good friend with a great heart. An instead of focusing on the negative he focused on the positive in his life which is his friends and family.
Said for me to keep mailing and such.. which I was planning on doing anyhow. I sent an email after I got a dose of reality and got his reply when I woke up again tonight. So this topic can die.