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Topic: Long Distance Relationships...
raiderfan_32's photo
Wed 02/04/09 02:00 PM
So I was just wondering how people actually make long distance relationships work..

the past few years, I've moved around from one city to another and back again no less than twice per year on account of being in school and doing internships in two different cities and going to school in a third.

What I continue to run into is that when I meet someone and feelings start to take root, eventually the issue arises that very soon, I'm not going to have to leave and go either back to school or off again to another internship...

the upshot of all this is that I have "love interests" in no less than three cities, none of which is within five hours drive of where I am at the moment.. which means that I really have no love interest at all, effectively..

the other wrinkle is that I'm supposed to take a job soon (within the year) after I finish with school but the job is in a city where neither of them is...

so how do you manage a long distance relationship where you're in one place, she's in another and your destination city is neither?

Cangel's photo
Thu 02/05/09 05:51 PM
honesty works best between the two couples. If they have an open communication then things will work. Yet they also have got to have that extra incentive to follow through with plans to see the other person.
An who knows maybe the other person will make way to be with the other person when things finally turn to serious.
its called compromise, and both parties has got to realize that before they decide to do the long distance relationship

Jhavez's photo
Fri 02/06/09 02:25 PM

So I was just wondering how people actually make long distance relationships work..

the past few years, I've moved around from one city to another and back again no less than twice per year on account of being in school and doing internships in two different cities and going to school in a third.

What I continue to run into is that when I meet someone and feelings start to take root, eventually the issue arises that very soon, I'm not going to have to leave and go either back to school or off again to another internship...

the upshot of all this is that I have "love interests" in no less than three cities, none of which is within five hours drive of where I am at the moment.. which means that I really have no love interest at all, effectively..

the other wrinkle is that I'm supposed to take a job soon (within the year) after I finish with school but the job is in a city where neither of them is...

so how do you manage a long distance relationship where you're in one place, she's in another and your destination city is neither?


Sounds like you should wait till you are done interning to get involved seriously. If you have "love interests" in 3 cities, maybe it really is not love. Just my opinion.

no photo
Fri 02/06/09 02:30 PM
The gal I am dating lives about 3-4 hrs away, and she comes to town and we go out about once a month. If you are looking to take things slow, its fine. Otherwise it sucks. We are looking foward to when she gets transfered back to town.

no photo
Fri 02/06/09 02:32 PM
i dont favor them really, i like to at least be with a woman im with once a week

PATSFAN's photo
Fri 02/06/09 02:35 PM
Local only , a relationship has to be physical for me, I don't need a pen - pal

no photo
Fri 02/06/09 02:41 PM
You find love where you find love.

If it is big enough, real deal - one of you relocates.

Badda - Bing, Badda-boom;

Doesn't have to be a big woop.

MelodyGirl's photo
Fri 02/06/09 02:43 PM
Hi happy

I believe a long distance relationship will only become successful if there is a clear and direct plan for either person to join the other. If you plan a future together, calculate the most exponential area where both of you can equally thrive in your careers and social endeavors.

The longer you postpone moving forward, the more your relationship will deteriorate and become a lower priority.

It will take effort; however, for the right person it will be worth every frequent flier mile!

Good luck!

Melody :heart:

papersmile's photo
Fri 02/06/09 02:49 PM
i think that our relationship works so well because neither of us make any demands, assumptions and/or expectations - either on each other, or on the relationship.

i think, also, the ability to see that 'traditional' isn't the only possible relationship that exists and, if the couple enjoys what each other has to offer at that particular point in their life, don't question/analyze it to death.

raiderfan_32's photo
Fri 02/06/09 03:34 PM
Edited by raiderfan_32 on Fri 02/06/09 03:35 PM
If you have "love interests" in 3 cities, maybe it really is not love.


never said it was love everlasting.. just someone I'm interested in with whom something may or may not ever really happen but with whom I like to keep a cordial relationship.. while attempting to stay out of the dreaded "friend zone".

there's a difference between exclusive girlfriend and someone you're interested in..

nothing wrong with that, is there??

**********************************************

so papersmile, you are presently engaged in a long distance relationship? did you meet long distance or did you just happen to have to move away from one another on account of some outside influence, e.g. a job, after the relationship was established? if you don't mind my asking, that is..

if the latter, how did you deal with the strain that the distance initially put on the relationship?

johnyboy24's photo
Fri 02/06/09 03:36 PM
papersmile you are hot!

Mr_Music's photo
Fri 02/06/09 03:39 PM

papersmile you are hot!


She thanks you, and her boyfriend accepts the compliment.

no photo
Fri 02/06/09 03:48 PM


papersmile you are hot!


She thanks you, and her boyfriend accepts the compliment.



lol...... too damn funny!!!!!!rofl rofl rofl

papersmile's photo
Fri 02/06/09 04:10 PM
so papersmile, you are presently engaged in a long distance relationship? did you meet long distance or did you just happen to have to move away from one another on account of some outside influence, e.g. a job, after the relationship was established? if you don't mind my asking, that is..

if the latter, how did you deal with the strain that the distance initially put on the relationship?


yes, i've been dating the same guy for about 2 1/2 years and we live about 1500 miles apart. we met on a similar dating site such as mingle2 (we just followed a bunch of already-established friends over here).

i think i'm one of the lucky ones; there is no strain on the relationship, not now and not in the beginning. we had an instant rapport and understanding of each other and that has only grown over the months.

RKISIT's photo
Fri 02/06/09 04:15 PM

so papersmile, you are presently engaged in a long distance relationship? did you meet long distance or did you just happen to have to move away from one another on account of some outside influence, e.g. a job, after the relationship was established? if you don't mind my asking, that is..

if the latter, how did you deal with the strain that the distance initially put on the relationship?


yes, i've been dating the same guy for about 2 1/2 years and we live about 1500 miles apart. we met on a similar dating site such as mingle2 (we just followed a bunch of already-established friends over here).

i think i'm one of the lucky ones; there is no strain on the relationship, not now and not in the beginning. we had an instant rapport and understanding of each other and that has only grown over the months.
yeah but i'm sure he misses you when your not there and would love for you to be there 24/7 unless of course theres the old sayin if we see each other less then i love you more...just sayin

papersmile's photo
Fri 02/06/09 04:23 PM
yeah but i'm sure he misses you when your not there and would love for you to be there 24/7 unless of course theres the old sayin if we see each other less then i love you more...just sayin


he probably thanks God that i live so far away when it's NFL sunday and/or he wants to watch a movie laugh

as i do him when i really should have taken the time to shave my legs!

~~~~

raiderfan_32's photo
Fri 02/06/09 04:23 PM

so papersmile, you are presently engaged in a long distance relationship? did you meet long distance or did you just happen to have to move away from one another on account of some outside influence, e.g. a job, after the relationship was established? if you don't mind my asking, that is..

if the latter, how did you deal with the strain that the distance initially put on the relationship?


yes, i've been dating the same guy for about 2 1/2 years and we live about 1500 miles apart. we met on a similar dating site such as mingle2 (we just followed a bunch of already-established friends over here).

i think i'm one of the lucky ones; there is no strain on the relationship, not now and not in the beginning. we had an instant rapport and understanding of each other and that has only grown over the months.


so the two of you have never lived in close proximity to one another as would be if you had met, for instance, at church or at a bar or an ice cream social??

RKISIT's photo
Fri 02/06/09 04:27 PM

yeah but i'm sure he misses you when your not there and would love for you to be there 24/7 unless of course theres the old sayin if we see each other less then i love you more...just sayin


he probably thanks God that i live so far away when it's NFL sunday and/or he wants to watch a movie laugh

as i do him when i really should have taken the time to shave my legs!

~~~~

laugh well he and i did hmmmmm about a carpet cleaner becoming a bong,so any woman who leaves a man alone when he his watching football...any LDR will workdrinker

papersmile's photo
Fri 02/06/09 04:51 PM
Edited by papersmile on Fri 02/06/09 04:52 PM
so the two of you have never lived in close proximity to one another as would be if you had met, for instance, at church or at a bar or an ice cream social??


that's correct

when we decided to meet, i flew from toronto to dallas to meet him and he drove from odessa to dallas/fort worth to pick me up from the airport.




Jhavez's photo
Fri 02/06/09 04:57 PM
I think that it would be too hard to have a serious long distance relationship (talking for myself here). A long distance relationship yes, but not something that I would consider serious. If I thought that the relationship might become serious in the near future, then I would try to work around the negatives of being in a long distance relationship.

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