okay so i've had a problem with guys getting involved with me just because i'm bisexual. they play the good guy card and everything seems great... then when sex gets in the picture they want a threesome. and when i say no they get pissed, and start pulling away and eventually things end... now i know what you're all going to say, that those guys just want sex... but my question is this: should i stop letting guys know i'm bisexual? im not ashamed of this at all, and i'm very sure of my sexuality. i dont want to hide it... but is that the only way of ending this sexual stupidity?

What you should do is:

a.) Don't hide the fact that you're bisexual -- that's a part of who you are, and to cover it up would be wrong for you. A guy who really cares for you will accept that fact; and

b.) Make it clear from the very start that you are not interested in threesomes. If he can't accept that, then he wasn't serious about you to begin with. Plus, you'll find out right away and be able to move on.

When you are with a man, do you still pursue a relationship/sex with a female? If you don't and are monogomous with this man then I see no need to tell him. If that relationship ends and you begin a relationship with a female, then no need to tell her either. jmo.

but i dont like to bring up sex too early (im a good girl haha) ... and that's kinda awkward to just say in the middle of a conversation.

i am monogomous... but some guys find out about my sexuality on their own.

i never have this problem with the girls.

Then let it be known as soon as the topic of sex comes up.

A lot of guys have the "threesome fantasy" and think a bi girlfriend is a free ticket to having it fulfilled. By the time you're serious enough about someone to be thinking about sex, these cards should already be on the table.

no, better to tell them. my 1st was bi and it wsnt much an issue to me. perhaps also mention that because of it no threesome

I'm asexual. I seem to just screw myself most of the time. I used to be trisexual. I would try anything once. But then came that booty thumb incident.

a lot of girls will play the 'bi' card to attract men. its understandable that they'd aim for the 3-some.

funny really - cause nothing kills relationships faster than introducing the '3rd wheel'

-- -- -- --

i think the answer you seek will be found in dating different men.

In the beginning of a relationship people supposedly become more dependent on sex, whenever sex is brought up earlier in a relationship. To put it another way, when you tell a guy you a bisexual, the kind of guy that will be "cool" with it because he considers that an attractive quality. You and i both know the answer to "why" that is... You know the saying "you reap what you sow".

Sexuality and emotion go hand in hand when maintaining a relationship. Ideally you start with emotion, let it develope a bit, then you build natural sexual urges that you eventually act on. The whole point is the sexual feelings are supposed to rely on the state of your emotional feelings. When sexual thoughts are introduced too early the emotion depends more on the sex. They are both important and whenever one lacks, eventually the other follows.

The reason i brought this all up is because guys are very sexual creatures. When you bring up your bisexuality, whether or not you like it, it inspires sexual thoughts in the guys you date, in turn making the relationship a little more reliant on sex. And when they cant act on these thoughts with you they become sexually disappointed thus causing them to withdraw emotionally.

I guess my advice would be not to bring it up at all. Or at least not for a while. I am not telling you to lie by any means. Just avoid the subject for at least a little while. Naturally as the guy gets to know you a bit better it will all come out. By then there will most likely be a more secure emotional bond between you two that goes further than a mere sexual fantasy. You may or may not already exercise this. But if it doesn't work just ditch the loser, move on to the next...

Believe it or not there are guys out there that are more interested in a stable relationship than a wild sexlife. It's just a matter of weeding through them all.

Some serious questions.
If you found a girl you committed to, would you give up men?
If you found a man you committed to, would you give up women?
If you're with a man, do you see getting sexual with a woman is cheating?
If you had a man you were serious wit, would you consider a threesome?

yes
yes
im not with a man, but yes i think it's still cheating.
i am NOT into threesomes.. that's the point.

okay what the hell is bisexual anyways? I get to cheat and you dont? Serious now if you want an open relationship then open it, but your just being selfish if you ask me. I am just giving a serious opinion.

wow did you read anything i've posted? I'M MONOGAMOUS IN MY RELATIONSHIPS. when i'm with a person, i'm not gonna cheat on them male/female. i wont even have a threesome, you really think im gonna cheat on them??????

bisexual is the sexual orientation that means i like women and men. it does not mean i want both at the same time. it means i'm attracted to both sexes. it doesn't make me any different from any other female.. i do not cheat.

by the way, i was asking for answers to my questions. your judgment was not needed.

Mchstiger,
You are pretty young but you seem to have yourself and your life together. I would venture to say that your dates are probably dealing with your revelations in a less than mature manner.
You might want to save the Bisexual revelation for awhile so you dont get the Pavlovian response.

sweetheart your right i wasnt paying very good attention. i thought you meant you want to date both but no threesome so i appologize.

I agree 100% here!!!

with which one?

Stand your ground from the start and tell him when u feel the time is right that threesoms r out of the picture.