I am in a relationship with no sex, love or respect for each other,he refuses to be involved. supposly he would die 4 me,but he wont take me out. kicker is i am a stay at home mom who cant afford 320.00 for daycare. So all i can do is wait till kids are school aged

hi

Dang that sux 4 u. I guess you will just have to tough it out.

I would be gone before my heart beats again.

He sounds sick and obsessed. And, why would you want someone too cheap to take you out - said the pot to the kettle....

it all started with stupid meds the doc put him on

what for?

im working on it 8 years hard to pick up and go. We go out separately, i believe thats a start we are eventually will break up.

depression, 1 year now.

ive helped him as much as i can, it seems helpless, i have 3 young ones who also need me, i dont want to abandon him, looks like i have no choice

If you are crying more then you're laughing... if your sad more then you're happy... and nothing is being done to rectify the situation... I would say time to part ways.

He has depression, so what do you have?

You should pick up and go right now!! No sex , no , no respect ?

what would you do 7 beautiful years, 1 bad, last year it started with sleeping day and night , then meds then distance do you guys/gals think its too soon.

sounds like it's might be time to part ways.

im feeling the effects, he stuck by me when i developed a thyroid disorder he stopped eating meat for my health, i dont know

One year? If he is working on it, being on meds shows signs of trying to do something.........a year to get straightened out really isn't so long......... Even with meds it can take up to three months to get to a dosage that MIGHT work, but won't because of the particular drug..........so if you try another, it could take another three or more months. This is why I'm saying that if someone is battling major depression, to expect things to be "all better" or even "better" in as little as a year is a bit much to ask.

You said, "it all started" when he was put on meds. He needs to try different meds, and seek counseling as well.

No you can't do everything, u need counseling and support, but he isn't able to give it in his condition.

Meds, will erase sex drive, depression will erase everything else.

If you love him, and care, it is worth working on imo.

Get help from others, family members, friends. If he is still depressed the meds aren't working, and are causing MORE problems.

I've been depressed, more than a year, and been with someone who was for more than a year. It all depends on who is willing to work at what.

If he is unwilling to do his part, try intervention, if it doesn't work............then it is up to you to decide.

P.S.
In most places there are agencies to help mothers with daycare so they can work.........and other services. You may not like to have to use them, but that is what they are there for.

Communicate with him, ask him about his feelings (lol, not funny but I know how hard it can be to get a guy to open up). He isn't happy either, and YES he can love you, and with depression not have the energy or desire to do anything.......anything at all if it gets real bad.

thank you all.

my dear that was awsome advice, I that way, but i also felt stressed. i havent really talked with him in 2 months im gonna make a nice night forhim maybe he'll be suprised and want to open up.

I know, it stresses you out, you run out of energy. When you give and give until you got nothing left. You have to make sure to take care of you. Not sure if I mentioned this in my last post, but read up on depression, and seek counseling for yourself to help you deal and cope. Depression isn't a disease that just hurts the person with it, it hurts everyone who cares for them.

As long as he is trying to "get better" then I would not give up on him either. If there was a time when things were good, when you were happy, and this is what has caused the problems, then hope is not gone.

Does he go to counseling? Is he open to it? (If not, and it is really that bad try to enlist friends and family to talk to him) Why is he depressed? Is it something that is still a part of his life? Like bad job, or feeling like what he is doing is pointless?

I know that depression zaps you of energy and motivation, but even if he had a hobby, trying to encourage him to get involved in it again. Something he loved.

Ultimately, he needs to love himself, and make sure there isn't some other chemical/hormonal thing going on.

Just don't keep doing the same old things, if they aren't working......let him know you care, and you are there, but also that you need "you" time to take care of you.

AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that's the best advice you'll ever get without spending thousands. well explained!