Why do people bring past relationship drama into new relationships? Do
they not know that that is a recipe or disaster?

I meant to say "for" disaster.

(disaster) An occurrence causing widespread destruction.A total
failure.An evil influence of a planet.Ya that about covers it.

drama is very hard to let go of. both conscious and unconscious.

we all have a lil"


Even if it is childhood baggage it is a part of who we are .

Hello tulip

&&&& I hate when that how a person words their
profile..

I just got out of a bad blah blah...

Well gggeeee now you need to get the hell over it!

All of me, my experiences, my past, present... come with me.
I am up front with it, and I believe many people lie when they say they
don't.

How can you have a lifetime and not share it with someone you care
about? and, if that person wants a shiny new woman with the wrapper
untouched? Headed for disappointment, and the following, crybaby, ohhh,
I was decieved!

bull

reality just is.

La, this is a very good point. In my opinion, people generally hate
being alone and before they've had time to truly deal and heal from past
realtionships, they're in a new one bringing the same idiosyncrasies
that caused failure in the their last relationship.

Usually I think it is cause they are not over that hump yet or the
person. We all have past relationship baggage but we must move on and
not blame the next person for what happen in the past. Sometimes some
should take longer before getting into a new relationship first. Deal
with the last one and get past it so they can move on. Some don't even
realize that they are dooming there new one due to they are still
hanging on to the old one.

Whilst we are our pasts,
there is nothing more off putting than hearing or reading
someones unhappy past within days, or even minutes of
meeting, or contact being made.

Personally I take quite a while for anyone to know my past,
one because they may not deserve to know it and two because
I don't want to hear it all the time myself!

Open minds are reseptive minds.

makes sense, you.=0)

From my stand point, I am damaged...

I also must deal with the mind games my ex uses on his own kids...

I have very real issues, and may never be over them. Whomever I allow
into my life had better undertsnad this up front, or not bother...

Seems harsh, but life is harsh sometimes. the way it is for me.lol

Now, do I blame everything on the past? hell no. I took responsibility
for my end awhile ago...

I don't have baggage. I carry reality with me.

baggage to me is the turkey flap under my arms, LMAO!

Well when you have kids the "ex's" ...like it or not...are still in the
picture. Pretending they don't exist is like having the white elephant
in the room that we don't talk about.

Knowing tidbits here or there about a person's past isn't a recipe for
disaster.

Like I said before, when you have kids they are still involved in your
lives.

What isn't healthy is knowing everything...like how she kissed, what
they got you for your birthday, christmas, when your anniversary is, etc
etc etc

you should truly be over your ex before entering a new relationship any
way or your just gonna hurt the new one

Hi La_Esperanza, I never had what you talk about. All my past
relationships have turned out good, for some reason. So the issue never
comes up in a negative way.

Other people around me may look at it as bad, but I look at it as
growing.

If anyone wanting to get close to me can't deal with reality, then they
can call it what they like...

There is no shoulda/coulda in some circumstances. There just is.

I think one reason might be is that they are not over the other person
yet, they may want to be and that is probably why they are with you. But
it just may be a bit hard for them.

baggage baggage (how come the airport never looses mine).
Everyone has some form of it-too much can ruin a relationship.
Espeically if its reruns all the time.

that's just it, yes?

So many folks want the sun and shiny...

for me? life is light and dark... and from my experiences most run when
long darkness comes along. They are so into the "me" of it, after awhile
they look elsewhere.
Then, they boohoo about how awful things were and forget it does take
two...

It's too easy to blame another for relationship leftovers...

I'm talking in general, but the "I am positive" folks that disappear
when life is hard, are those I don't want near me anyway. Can you
imagine what they'd do offline? hell.

again, some reality just sucks, and we do the best we can...

Scars, flaws, illness... whatever, anyone that has lived life has them.
All the flowers and pomp doesn't impress me a bit.
Gimme a reality based person, with common sense anyday.

I admit my mistakes & screwups....usually laugh about it ..