what will we do when all these "little darlings" that are growing up today, that have had no or very little exposure to God, And no or very little chastisement for unacceptable behavior are out in the world among the working class. Oh, have you been to an airport lately or a government office building. We are already doing it!

It isn't about GOD. It's about respect and the upbringing. If you raise good kids, then more than likely they will be good adults.


My son will NOT be exposed to the brainwashing tactics that churches have. I will do my best to make sure he is a respectful and caring person. But isn't that what everyone should be doing?

Yes they should be. But so many parents are convinced that their little darling child is so perfect that they won't allow them to be corrected for not being respectful. It is the line of thinking that goes along with survival of the fittest stuff. The it is ok to steal if you have to kind of thing. I wish there were easy answer's so we could just all go party and have a good time. But it is not that way. Children who grow up with the influence of no chastisement for wrong behavior do not learn enough respect at an early age to even be able to focus on what is being said to them to the point of understanding. They get the idea that they can just let their mind wonder without any consequences, not a good thing.

Remember that our parents were sure WE were going to be the end of civilization and the human race (sex, drugs, rock n' roll, etc) and now we are their ages looking at a new generation.

Honestly..."kids nowadays" aren't bad overall. I have a lot of exposure to teenagers and young adults and sure...some are rude idiots, but I'm betting you know some adults who are the same (I know I do!)

Also remember that respect is reciprocal. If you practice an "act respectfully to me because I'm your elder but I can treat you like s#%t" lifestyle, you will be disappointed in what you get back. It MIGHT be polite but it won't have anything to do with respect.

Raised in a church or not, my observation is that most of the age group you called "little darlings" genuinely are...smart, respectful and a very bright hope for the future. People should look for that good and cultivate it instead of focusing on the negative.

I am assuming you are referring to the biblical god? It should not matter as human morality is not directly related to religiosity and that applies to ANY spirituality. Most humans have an instinctual and cognitive grasp on "right and wrong". This is also reinforced by external components that are outside of our control such as parenting, society, and the laws which govern that society.

The only human that would fall outside of this range of acceptable behavior would be those that suffer from borderline personality disorder in some respect or a classic sociopath. Interestingly enough, several cult leaders have been diagnosed sociopaths.

Is the U.S. way of life a Cult?

I dont understand that comment. Can you re-phrase a little more clearly please?

I have to agree that in today's world alot of kids are out of control. I see it everywhere I go. What it all boils down to is the parent making them behave and reprimanding them when they don't. Now I know alot of people out there frown upon spanking but I was spanked growing up and I spanked my kids as well. I grew up fine and so did my kids. I can proudly say that my kids are not out of control nor do they disrespect others (unless they are mistreated by others). Parents need to stop fearing or having the mind set that spanking will forever ruin their childs mentality in life. That's a bunch of BS. I could go on forever on this subject but it all boils down to "control" of the kid. Kids now day control the parents which is NOT how it's supposed to be!

I agree. My mom always did the "slap on the back of the wrist." whenever I began to act up in public. I also received minor spankings if I persisted in the bad behavior once warned.

I didnt grow up to be a serial killer.

Children need to understand that their actions, both good and bad, will have consequences.

when i went back to college I worked as a "sub" teacher.


you have no clue the nature of the little monsters these days.


check this out

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hLDGFzdPjBU

That's why you couldn't pay me all the money in the world to try and teach these little monsters. I would probably wind up in jail for assault on either the child or the parent because the parents of these kinds of kids are just as bad!

do not forget their lawyers, you touch a kid these days
and you are instantly in serious trouble....& they know it

I remember just during the time I was in school, we were so horrible to subs. Well I wasnt of course because I was a good student but some of my friends and people in class could be downright cruel to them. Subs are babysitters with a lesson plan essentially. Its awful for them a good portion of the time.

I much to often see out of control kids as well. I guess that is what started my thought process about posting this thread. I was at the library yesterday trying to concentrate on my reading. I toddler (about 3 or so) started throwing a temper tantrum about something. This child was screaming and crying out so loud about "but I want that one" that the entire library was listening and watching. (big library, 4 stories) The parent did nothing but kept saying in a soft voice "come on, lets go sugar". After the episode was over (about 20 minutes). I asked one of the librarian's if there isn't some kind of policy about excessive noise anymore in public libraries. Her response was classic. "I can neither confirm or deny that there may or may not be. That is all I can tell you". What a bunch of weenies we have become to allow these punk ass lawyers to screw us out of the right to enjoy the books our tax dollars pay for. Shame on them!

I dont view that as directly corresponding to religion as pointed out though. I see it as being unruly kids.

There are lots of ways to establish expectations and there should be consequences for failure to keep up your end of things. I agree with that totally.

Discipline and punishment are different things.

I grew up in a spanking (and worse) house and it initially seemed natural to punish. But I spanked only a few times because it dawned on me that if I was angry, I shouldn't be spanking in the first place and if I wasn't angry, I could come up with a better response. That doesn't mean there weren't consequences for bad behavior but I honestly had little of it because the EXPECTATIONS were clearly understood and the respect I gave my kids was genuine and then reciprocal - you DO get back what you model!

I've got two amazing, respectful kids - age 17 and 22. High work ethic, respectful, loving, socially responsible, etc. They choose friends who are the same, regardless of the home environment the friends come from. (That doesn't mean they don't act like idiots or do dumb things at times...but that's youth, not being bad.)

I wouldn't change my approach if I could do it all over again. Except that I might skip those first few spankings I gave...

Spanking is bad, the death penalty is ok? I believe spanking at a early age as a last resort only. And only if the child is old enough to understand what the should or should not have been doing anyway. And then only in a calm controlled satiation. I never used the word spanking in the OP by the way. The word was chastisement.

And the parent should have taken the kid out of the library immediately.

Not getting ANYTHING when you behave badly is one good example of a consequence.

Yeah, I know...the parent wouldn't get their books either at that moment...too bad for them & they just have to suck it up - part of the deal of parenting is that you might be inconvenienced once in a while.

I left places empty handed a couple times. But that also served to model for acting with respect for the place and the people around me...

Noted...spanking came up in another response.

when i was in elementary school, we didnt fear the teachers, but we defiantly listened to what they said.

we did not have a 3 strikes you are out, it was one warning and
then after that, you went into some serious negotiations
with the teacher about leniency.


while subbing the 6th grade, i had 6ft 200lb kids try to
"stare" me down. didnt work very well on their part.

i just immediately sent them out of class to stand in the hall for the rest of the class.

i didnt have to deal with them & the interruption to the class was immediately solved.