Topic: Forrest Gump goes to heaven...
shenadra's photo
Sun 04/08/07 10:12 AM
The day finally arrived. Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven. He is
at
the Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself.
However, the gates are closed, and Forrest approaches the gatekeeper.

St. Peter said, "Well, Forrest, it is certainly good to see you. We
have
heard a lot about you. I must tell you, though,
that the place is filling up fast, and we have been ministering an
entrance
examination for everyone. The test is short,
but you have to pass it before you can get into Heaven."

Forrest responds, "It sure is good to be here, St. Peter, sir. But
nobody
ever told me about any entrance exam.
I sure hope that the test ain't too hard. Life was a big enough test as
it
was."

St. Peter continued, "Yes, I know, Forrest, but the test is only three
questions:

First: What two days of the week begin with the letter T?
Second: How many seconds are there in a year?
Third: What is God's first name?"

Forrest leaves to think the questions over. He returns the next day and
sees St. Peter, who waves him up, and says,
"Now that you have had a chance to think the questions over, tell me
your
answers."

Forrest replied, "Well, the first one — which two days in the week
begins
with the letter "T"? Shucks, that one is easy.
That would be Today and Tomorrow."

The Saint's eyes opened wide and he exclaimed, "Forrest, that is not
what I
was thinking, but you do have a point, and
I guess I did not specify, so I will give you credit for that answer.
How
about the next one?" asked St. Peter.

"How many seconds in a year? Now that one is harder," replied Forrest,
but
I thunk and thunk about that, and I guess the only answer can be
twelve."

Astounded, St. Peter said, "Twelve? Twelve? Forrest, how in Heaven's
name
could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?"

Forrest replied, "Shucks, there's got to be twelve: January 2nd,
February
2nd, March 2nd.... "

"Hold it," interrupts St. Peter. "I see where you are going with this,
and
I see your point, though that was not quite what I had in mind... but I
will
have to give you credit for that one, too. Let us go on with the third
and
final question. Can you tell me God's first name"?

"Sure," Forrest replied, "it's Andy."

"Andy?" exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St Peter. "Ok, I can
understand how you came up with your answers to my first two questions,
but
just how in the world did you come up with the name Andy as the first
name
of God?"

"Shucks, that was the easiest one of all," Forrest replied. "I learnt
it
from the song:

"ANDY WALKS WITH ME, ANDY TALKS WITH ME,
ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN... "

St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates, and said: "Run Forrest, run."










WillTanner's photo
Sun 04/08/07 10:32 AM
lol that was pretty funny

RainbowTrout's photo
Sun 04/08/07 10:34 AM
Yeah, run Forest don't walk, lol.

MsTeddyBear2u's photo
Sun 04/08/07 10:45 AM
laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh
Good one LOL. (Run Forrest Run-in Jennys voice). :)

ccrzyolfool's photo
Sun 04/08/07 10:47 AM
roflmao way too good

Thndrghost's photo
Sun 04/08/07 02:56 PM
laugh laugh laugh laugh drinker

bigpappa4331's photo
Mon 04/09/07 12:13 PM
lol

no photo
Mon 04/09/07 12:20 PM
OK ... have to give you that one too .. LMAO ...

NANCYM1957's photo
Mon 04/09/07 09:53 PM
hey i liked that forest gump about the god part you dont here much about
god any more!but it was cute and made me giggle!!

HEY YOU WOMEN GO TO TOPICS AND CHECK OUT
news and somrthin??
title: seen on tv (brains)

karmafury's photo
Mon 04/09/07 09:59 PM
laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh

crazysillygirl's photo
Tue 04/10/07 06:20 AM
that was the darndest thing ive ever heard .....LMAO,,,too much!!!!!