Kudo's to Houston for being such a mature and understanding woman. Although I am surprised that the ex's wives don't have a problem with the friendships.

Personally I would not get involved in the domestic disputes.

I like to see everyone get along. Life is too short for negative feelings.

Only problem I can see here is if the ex's want to get back together with Houston because they are such good friends.

I'm generally a very positive person, but am going to play Devil's Advocate here.

Given the fact that one of the women wanted to listen in on a conversation with you and her husband to see what he would say about her....and the fact that both calls where within a few hours of each other...any chance the wives are playing you?

I hope not, but it does make me wonder. Either way, I'd stay out of it completely! If they are genuine these are problems they have to work out with their husbands. No good will come of you being in the mix. And, true friends will understand that and won't put you in that position!

Best of luck!

Don't get tangled in other people's web unless you want to get bitten

I've found that any new lady "friend" I have and am involved with gets irate if I try to continue with open lines of communication of an ex, whether I label them friend or foe. Out of respect for the current lady in my life at any given moment in time I step back from chat or meeting with the exes. Otherwise I'd be sleeping in the doghouse for more than a few nights until her little temper tantrum/jealous instincts get the best of both of us and I just throw my hands up and admit it's not worth it. Assumptions that communication with an ex is tantamount to continuing to pursue former feelings which are usually long ago dead, buried and stinking, are too strong an argument to effectively defend against. When I walk away, I keep on walking and don't look back. The baggage is just too heavy and guilt ridden to bring along into a new relationship. Thus is life and respect for your current beau or beauty.

maybe I should explain more than I did....--

Both of these men were men I dated MANY years ago, and neither for a long amount of time. There was no ugly break up or tears, all that... -- so throughout the years we've stayed friends.

So, yes, they are ex's (techincally), but more importantly they've always been close friends.

I do completely understand the 'respect' aspect couples should have for each other, putting each other first. That is how it should be -- but it's also never right (or healthy) for another person to tell somehow who their friends should or shouldn't be.

It only gets uncomfortable if people try to be sneaky about talking behind someone's back. I've never done that. Anytime any close 'male' friend of mine gets serious with a woman I go out of my way to get to know her and extend my friendship to her. To me, it's out of respect for my friends and the women, so they truly know we are strictly friends.

As we get older in life there should be many friends who remain throughout the years - men and women. Some of you already know this; but I was with a man for over 8 years who I lost to brain cancer.... - throughout that time we both leaned not only on each other, but our friends, for support and happiness. Even before his cancer though, we were very open and trusting about each other's friends, and that's how it should be really.