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I'm not a parent but i have a question.. i'm the 2nd youngest of 8 and
the last to still be at home and be able to support myself. sometimes it feels like my mother just puts up with me and doesn't love me as much as my siblings.. i'm not a total **** up or anything but it still feels like im not as valuable as the rest. my question is do parents have a hard time loving each kid as much as the other... or is it different |
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Jeff,,, I have ((4))) Children who have 4 different personalities and 4
different needs, the Love I have for them is Beyond Incredible thier is no favoritism from one to the other,, I can say with only having One at home now,, he is pretty spoiled and the time we share together is Incredible and I have more patience with him than I did with the older ones,, Yet the Love I have does not differ from one to the other... The Bond between a Parent and a child is OMG!!! Amazing,,, I love them all for who they are Equally. |
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Jeff, my opinion is that you are the only one that can answer that. Do
you pay what you should and not the minimum? Do you help her as much as you can and not the basics? Maybe she has plans for herself when all of her children are on thier own. Maybe it's just pure frustration on her part. Have you tried to sit down and talk about how you feel and what you can do to make things different even if it means going on your own. Just food for thought and I hope it helps. |
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she just wants to make sure we are all on our own feet before she
dies..i help as much as i can around the house but it just seams like her attention sometimes is more to my siblings. maybe its just cause im around so i talk to her all the time and everything. but things have never been easy for me. i got some minor disabilities and such (nothing i cant work around) but its hard to get a foot in a door somewhere |
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maybe her attention is on your siblings because they NEED her attention
more. i have four children, and i love them all differently...yet overpoweringly so. it's impossible to even describe...two of my children have special needs...you give each child what they personally need... |
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Thats so true lulu.
I have tow children, one six and one four with adhd. Needless to say the younger one tends to get more one on one attention from me than the older simply because he NEEDS it. BUT they both know I love them dearly and therewill never be a difference betweent hem where that comes in. |
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I live next door to my mother I see her and talk to her every day, when
one of my brothers come or call I get ignored in a way they become the center of attention not because my mother loves me any less but because she sees me all the time. She wants her boys to be there and and tends to place them (it seems) on a higher ground then myself when they do come around. My mom also tells me more personal things then her sons cause I am always there. I know how your feeling its ok she loves ya she just don't miss ya |
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well i hate feeling like a disappointment
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Jeff,,, Your not a dissapointment,, Dont let yourself think this in
anyway,,,. We as parents get older and forget some times that are Adult Children need us from time to time,, just to reassure them of the Love,,, Smile Sweetie,,, You are a good person and your Mom knows this,,, |
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I have three grown children and i love them all with all my heart and
soul but each child is different to me because they are different from each other ,where i could cuddle and kiss one and it would be fine would irritate the hell out of the other ,just because your mother treats you different does not mean a thing it just means her love for you is just as deep just different than the other's |
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i know i guess i just wish i felt more needed or what not
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Hon sometimes you are needed for no other reason than just to be there
,you are loved or the fact is if you werent you wouldnt be here talking about it ,so please try not to stress over it your mother loves you and needs you in her own way |
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Thanks
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jeff i think we've all felt like you but in time i think we all found
out that our parent loved us in a away, and once you find that out no one can take that from you. ok im not sure what the hell is said |
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I only have 2 children and they are 10 years apart..
I love them both the same but differently, as far as i have to treat each one as an individual. And they are both different.... btw love isn't the word I'm looking for ie......as far as treating them differently....... it is more about how I interact with both differently.. |
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i wrote my mom a car don mothers day and i dont know if she knows how
much she means for me for putting up with me.. i just hope she can see me thur this stressful time and i can maybe help her for a while |
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there are no favorites with my two daughters.
Maybe you need some confidence man. Take some self help courses. Based on some of your threads you seem down and need some support. |
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hmm.. i can't really relate.. i'm the favorite out of the 5 lol... but
what i would say is that your mother loves you you are her child and that if you want things to change how about incorporating yourself into her life more don't expect her to do it to you, make a mother son day when you guys can go out and catach a baseball game, go see a movie, a musical, ballet, heck whatever your mom is interested in .. museums art shows.. theres all kinds of stuff or merely sit down and talk to her about stuff i have a close relationship with both of my parents yet each in a different way.. ! and if you have self esteem issues like puck suggested then try to volunteer help others out that wil lmake you feel better inside read a few self help novels it starts with little things that become huge things! |
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May the road rise to meet you, May the wind always be at your back, May
the sun shine warm upon your face. Look and ask brother you will find ur way. Life is aj ourney not a destination. Find mentors,coaches build network of associates, friends, etc |
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email me if u have Q
my name is TODD |
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