If there are kids involved it's truly "until death we do part" because the only way to get rid of them is to ...well, you get the idea

I married at 19 (WHAT was I thinking?) and he cheated before our first anniversary and I put up with it for 12 years (actually put his stuff on the porch ON our anniversary - best gift I ever gave myself in retrospect ) Efforts at "civil" have been better and worse - but he's got mental illness issues so I don't know if it will ever be consistently civil. I'd wish so, but it just is what it is...don't stress over it...just go live a full and happy life and deal with the ex as you need to in each set of circumstances. Remember "civil" doesn't have to mean you seek him/her out for things...just that if you meet in passing you can be a little bit like a grown-up :)

I filed on my then wife. she cheated on me once and i took her back but other things came up and i couldnt take it anymore. I have 2 girls and thats the hardest part about it for me trying to be civil with her. I have no choice but to deal with her. my advice for you get out now its not easy but needs to be done otherwise you will end up being even more hurt.

And hey...it's SO much better to raise kids in a single parent household than in a mixed-message household! Could I fully be both dad and mom? Of course not...but my two terrific kids make me realize that I did the best thing for them as well as me, IMHO.

I have been there recently...it sucks, but getting out was the best thing i have ever done in all my life! granted, i had to threaten to file the papers myself to get him to do anything about it, but he finally did. my life is getting so much better, and yours will too...file those papers and move on with your life hun, you deserve better than that!
Becca

The real message is:
Divorce is sad and certainly not the first choice anyone wants to make...
but it's okay and you can be FINE and your kids can be FINE and life can be WONDERFUL despite it!

Live it large!

smith n weston for an attorney.!!!!

Even if you initiate the divorce, it is never an easy thing. It was probably the most emotional time in my life. I wish you alot of luck......

I agree.....divorce plays havoc on your psyche. It doesn't help to hear it at first, but time really will heal the wounds. Now I'm just pissed off at his shenanigans, but removed from the deep down heartbreaking part of it. There were days in the beginning when I wasn't sure I could go on.....but of course you do....and life continues to get better each day!

Please, for your own sake and sanity, get out of this while you can. I hate to stereotype, but it's a very consistent statistic that cheaters seldom reform. The choice is yours, of course, because ultimately, you really CAN'T live with someone you can't trust.

Best of Luck to you.

Give up the anger, it will continually pull you down to his level. Once you no longer care he will have no power to hurt. Then you can see him for the truly pathetic person he is and realize your own inner worth as someone truer and stronger.

three weeks ago, i finally found the courage to say to my now "ex" husband that i coudn't take it anymore. His womanizing and gambling has gotten into me and i just woke up one morning, i looked at him and i realized " God, i'm miserable!" it too me three years to finally realized that probably because i have three kids. Its kinna hard to move on and look at the kids and the way things used to be.. but you know what, after a while, i am finally moving on.. i still have the moments of "feeling all alone " but i am better this way.. you can move on girl just be ready for some lonely moments but it will soon go away or i should say you'll get used to it.. sometimes, we choose the wrong guy for the right seasons

The guy I was dating cheated after we have been seeing each other for 6 months. WE met here. He was not happy I was online emailing my new friends. He was meanwhile cruising for more women to sleep with. I caught him cheating. I wanted to try to be friends but the trust factor was a problem. I did not know if he liked me as a friend or he thought
I was stupid enough to sleep with him (NOT!!!!) so I told him I could no longer be friends since I do not trust nor believe anything he says. I have not heard from him since. I think once a cheater always a cheater... He was always jelaous of me and my exhusband. He thought I wanted to sleep with my exhusband. I do not.. I get along with him. We accepted to put the past behind us since our girls are 10 & 2. WE still have to talk and see each other for the girls things. softball gymanstics etc.

Few of us get through this journey called life without experiencing a cheating mate. When your loved one cheats it is very damaging to your self-esteem and self-worth. Just remember it is not a reflection of YOU but a disfunction of them.

My wife called me last night & said she's getting a new lawyer & wants to know if I'm still willing to sign papers, I said as longas I have yhem checked out & I'm not getting screwed, I have my pen in hand ready to sign!!!!!!

i fell out of love with him b4 he asked for the divorce i have moved on not many guys are willing to date a separated woman. im happier now than what i was with him even though money is really tight. i regretted marrying him shortly after we married. his woman can have him hes just goin to cheat on her anyway. ill find someone better than him. its easier talking with people whos gone or goin through what i am. if i didnt have my friends and family i would have been lost through this whole situation.

Amen to that hun! My friends and family really helped me through my situation..in times like this, you really find out who your friends are. If you ever need someone to talk to, feel free to email me..i have been there..it sucks but you will make it through :)

Well 1st off you didn't do anything wrong or deserve this.People cheat because they do not Value or Honor the commitment they made.They are selfish,self centered ME ME ME people who can't see past themselves.No property or kids to fight over makes it easier for you to move on with your life.
I just went through this same situation and I will tell you as time goes on life gets easier and happier.Also ignore all the Bullsh!t stories he is eventually going to tell about you trying to justify his actions to all your friends and family.

my wife and i were married23 years.i supported her for 3years while she went back to school. She had an affair with a classmate. I forgave her....stupid me...but she wanted to remain friends with this person. Cheating is unacceptable...if they do it once it will happen again..it hurts but you have to move on and hope your perfect match will come. Chris

I love that saying!! Just because i believe in fidelity that does not make me crazy thank you!