We all have them. Some of us are WAY better at voicing them (which could be a very bad thing of course) than others but I think we all need to from time to time. How about we talk a bit about them? Get them out.

I'll go first. *Lays on the couch*

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My profile pics are all me. I'm happy to say that, and know that some people find me pretty. That gives me warm feelings in my cockles. That said, I'm wary of meeting anyone in person, as I do have 5 children and a tummy that proves it. I wear my clothes well and am far from obese or even really fat, but I have been called fat by some, and am not a skinny minny. That is to say, I'm 5'5, and weigh 150 lbs. Is that that bad? I dunno. I just don't want to disapoint anyone who thinks I have a flat, hard tummy based on my pics.

Whew! That makes me feel better!

Here... take the couch. I have the chair now:

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I get told all the time how gorgeous I am but I dont see it due to a lot of my exes saying horrible things to me... I used to be real skinny and a varsity cheerleader in HS.. Then I got sick and the doctors f*cked with my meds and it caused me to gain a lot of weight... I'm scared of meeting people because Im petrified they will think Im fat and run away

I have too many to list...

well it all depends on the type of guy who you are seeing. a lot of guys go for looks while others don't even care what you look like and go for your personality. if i meet a girl and she was skinny and fit and beautiful then thats awesome. if she gets older and gains weight and loses her beauty, then its still awesome. that girl to me is still the same girl i dated and fell in love with and would never leave her just because she "changed".

i pretend to be stupid, so that you are interesting.

it is amazing just how much controll we give other people..
it saddens me...

my ex warped my sence of pretty and ugly so bad that i dont think i will ever think im pretty again.......

my thought was always that if you are going to cheat on me .. at least do it with someone pretty so that it makes sense.... but for him to call me fat ugly, hidieous. and disgusting.. then sleep with some of the people he cheated on me with..


there must be something MONUMENTALY wrong with me then right?? i mean for me to be worse than THEM!!?? i am hidieous...


it took years to get over that thinking.. and on occasion it still creeps in my head anyway..

but one way or another.. i know that im better than him.. and better than the things he did to me.. and better than the things he said..

i am me.. take it or leave it... i like me.. (most of the time)

All I can say is EVERY woman is beautiful in their own way and if a man cant see that, its HIS loss, not yours!!!!

See how great therapy is? Don't we all feel a million times better now?

hahahahaha

i dont think i like your couch!

Are you asking for us to tell our insecurities?

My biggest insecurity is my weight as well... so i know how you feel. I am scared to meet this guy I've been talking to because I think he probably expects me to have a perfect body or something... but at the end of the day you have to be happy with yourself and not try to live up to others expectations. I am going to meet him and if he doesn't like it... too bad. I can lose weight, but I won't do it for someone else!

Yup!

Lauren, yeah. I think the problem is we see all these beautiful girls in magazines and on TV and we know the men want that, and we think they'll be disapointed in us because we're real women and not their fantasy. I'm not saying this isn't true, because I haven't exactly disproven it in my own mind, but there ya have it!

I'm 5'5" and weigh 165--I have had guys say that I am fat, and other guys say that I am skinny. By my own estimation I need to lose a few pounds, and I am sure that I will, since it was for the love of BEER that I gained all that weight in the first place. Me and Beer are only seeing each other every once in awhile now.

Helmut says that I need to "lose five pounds". I ask him if that is REALLY more or less, and he repeats, "five pounds", and gives me an annoyed look. (One of his other girlfriends is anorexic, so I can understand his dislike for the subject.)

My nose has been a lifelong source of insecurity for me. Obviously it's too big, but I'm much too proud (and too broke) to get anything done about it.

And when all is said and done, I try to imagine myself with another nose, but I really can't. Me + my nose = together forever. (For better or for worse!)

It probably has something to do with karma, I imagine. yours in Chaos, Scarlett

I have a huge scar on my shin and side of my calf from a motorcycle accident years and years ago. I wear shorts, but don't like when people ask me about it. I see girls in skirts and heels with beautiful legs and I know mine don't look like that.

I don't know if I've ever said that outloud before...

I'm kind of insecure about showing my insecurities...

Ummm...who says that " the men " want that? That may be what you have been lead to believe by the mainstream media, but in all actuality, I am pretty sure that there are a majority of us ( men ) that would be more than happy with someone who isn't model'ish as long as she has a functioning brain and can know enough about what makes us tick to make us happy.

All that a scar says to me is that the person who has it didn't lead a sheltered life before I got there.

The media prefers skinny women, but I've only known two men the real world who did. Every other guy I've talked to prefers bigger women. So I wouldn't worry about being the "ideal woman," - for those who do worry. As for my insecurities, eh, well I don't really have any.

my insecurities are all my scars along with being called fat and ugly by all my exs

This is the message many of us were raised with and get bombarded with every day! It's really hard to overcome this and LOVE OURSELVES! It is a daily challenge for me, but am finding that when I believe I'm beautiful - others seem to, as well. (It always surprises me a little, though!)

When I read a lot of the mens' forum posts, it seems that there are a lot more honest comments (as opposed to the joking or smart-alecky ones) about looking beyond "physical perfection" than I would have expected...good going, guys...you give us girls hope :) (Of course we also aren't stupid and if perfect shows up, we'd probably wonder what was wrong if you didn't at least LOOK!)

Wow...therapy is good stuff, no???

Media generalizes women only to the extent of shallow thought,prideful women know who and what they are ,so it doesnt affect them.If a person lives a life based on others perceptions, than they will always be slaves to outside influence and never have there own viewpoint to make them proud.Oh and as for my insecurities,well im insecure about being secure...as in a certain lady to make me lose all inhibitions and lose control and feeling.