is there such a thing? any merit that can come of it? is that what I am seeking on this site? or should i start off with more enlightened motives...

Are the two scared of the same thing or of each other?

i'm thinking maybe they are polar opposites... however, i make choices every day that involve flavors that are both loving and fearful... i seem to be able to make a choice - in terms of which to feed.

Do you mean fear as in fear of being alone so dating and mating for the sake of not being alone?
Or do you mean something deeper, psychological, like needing to have a roller coaster fear-based submissive relationship that is wrought with a key to self-destruction like those nutty movies tend to expose?

If one is mean and the other submissive I'd have to go with there is such a thing as fear based love but only until the mouse decides to turn into a lion and then someones getting hurt.
Fear of being alone. I'd hve to say yes, as long as the other person is kind.

Fear-based love seemed to work for the Biblical God pretty well.

"Love me or go to hell!"

That seems to be the idea.

Not sure if it'll work for a mortal man though.

what other kind of love is there? unconditional? does that exist?

Unconditional love absolutely exists. I have no doubt about that at all.

There are many other kinds of love as well.

Gratification love, for example. To love someone simply because it makes you feel good to love them. That's gratification love. Not necessary a bad thing either.

Infatuation love, is another example. Not really all that different from gratification love except it implies elements of lust. Lust isn't a bad thing either, especially if it's accompanied with love. Love, of course is to care for the object of your infatuation. Love and infatuation are not mutually exclusive, unless of course, you go by some dictionaries which define infatuation as "loveless lust".

I just see infatuation as "lust". And I see no reason why it can coexist with genuine affection and care (which is love). So I see the possiblity of infatuation and love coexisting (but again, that could fly in the face of some dictionary definitions which demand that infatuation be loveless).

There are also perfectly natural forms of love. I loved my mother probably more than anyone in my entire life. That love was based simply on the fact that she was a beautiful person and deserved to be loved. She emanated love like a glowing halo. It would be hard not to love her if you'd spend much time with her.

I said that unconditional love exists, but maybe not. At least not in humans. After all, there needs to be some reason you love someone. People who claim to have unconditional love would need to love demons. But when does that kind of love become superficial love? If you hate what a person (or entity) stands for, then how could you claim to love them. What is the "THEM" that you're claiming to love???

I think what most people do in that regard is just pretend that they could love the undesirable person if they undesirable person would simply change their ways.

However, I believe there can be "unconditional love" in a realistic sense. And that simply means to continue to love someone even when they aren't showing love back to you.

Also, there is a big different between "spiritual love" and "Romantic Love". Let's face it. Romantic love implies physcial intimacy. If there's no physical attraction how can there be any "Romantic love". Unless of course, the very term "Romantic" is being used differently than most people use it.

There are a lot of women that I care about as persons. I care what happens to them and I would love to see them have the best possible life, and greatest happiness. But I have absolutely no physical attraction to them at all. So while I can love them spiritual (as persons), I'm not about to love them physcially as in becoming a Romantic Mate with them.

In fact, it's this need for physical attaction that makes finding a romantic partner extremely difficult. If I could just physically make love at any woman with total disregard for physical attraction I could find a "Romantic Partner" in a heartbeat.

Unfortunately "Romantic Love" requires much more than just spiritual love. And that's because we do indeed have physical bodies, and physical intimacy is EXPECTED. So if there's no physical attraction it can't become "Romantic Love". It must remain "just friends" (i.e. Spiritual Love only).

Unconditional love exists, I know. A lot of my friends have it and they are still so happy to have found him/her, you can see it in their eyes, their actions. So why is it so hard to find these days? Did it only exist 50 years ago?
Is it too much to ask for?

love with no motive... i'll shoot for that - sounds "divine" :)

Yes and only in novels and movies .

Well actually... I think without it we take eachother for granted...why would we not take God for granted as well?

Godly fear is an AWESOME respect for God & who He is. The reality of God brings respect, love, & adoration.

Human fear is slavery.

Hope this helps...

Religion teaches heatred and wars not peace and love . If there is a god then he must be really blind to see all the atrocities in this globe .

thats not it at all abracadabra, the biblical fear of God (in my opinion) means a respect, so to speak, for him and what he wants for us, and how he expects us to live our lives. Sure, don't get me wrong, I would have been terrified of God in Noah's time. Fearing (respecting) his awsome power

fear based love is better known as "Battered Wife Syndrome"

Fear-Based Love...
...An Oxymoron

When I'm in fear of displeasing you to have you no longer love me...

I'm not loving you...
I'm not loving me...
And the dance of Hell on Earth grips me (temporarily)...
Then It lifts...

I just wish it wouldn't return. Each time, I suppose I learn a fragment more.

Fear based love???

What are you drinking??????


That's not Love, that's co-dependency, a dis-ease.

To be Love, there are no negative emotions... no fear no doubt, anger, jealousy, angst.... Love is a freedom of all attachments...


Fear is attachment...Love is not.

You mean like love means never having to say your sorry? hehehe

yes such a thing exist because some people can be so in fear of what a God may do to them if they make the choice not to Love the God so they instead make the choice to love the god out of fear

I don't think it matters much to God whether we love him out of fear, respect, or whatever, as long as we get to God through our belief in the crucifiction and ressurection of his Son, Jesus Christ and asking him to forgive our sins and come into our life, I think that's what he cares about.

Fear or not, I think he wants our love and he wants fellowship with us.