I was hoping maybe someone could give me a little help with a situation. I've been seeing this guy for about 4 months now, and I really like him a lot. I was pretty sure he liked me too. We saw each other two or three times a week at first, talked on the phone at least once a day, and texted a few times to get us through the work day. This was all while he was working a full time job and taking four college classes. He has 5 kids (I know, it's a lot!) that he has every other week. Since his classes have been over for the summer, I've seen him less and less, he has a second job, and his kids have a lot of stuff going on too.

I know he's super busy, I understand that, I have stuff going on too, but it's gotten to the point where I'll go two or three days without hearing anything from him at all, no phone, no email, no text, nothing. My problem is that I have a tendency to overanalyze and think about things too much, so I've been stewing over all this for the past month or so, and it's really getting me down. I don't know if it's how busy he his and all the stuff that's going on, or if it's just that he's just not into me anymore.

So, am I making excuses for him, thinking about how busy he is? Or am I just worrying too much? Because my gut feeling is that something's wrong. Do I trust my gut? How do I approach the subject without being confrontational or *****y or sounding selfish?

Have you asked him if something is going on?

The honeymoon phase is over.......this is him in real life.

Just be honest. Tell him you feel like ya'll are growing apart and you don't want that to happen. Just try to talk to him, be honest - not needy and see what happens.

My advice for what its worth,Ease off and if he is interested,he'll be back,otherwise it was not meant to be.Let fate play a role in this,what will be will be!

listen to your gut feeling...

if he not getting you involued on the w/e with his kids. Then he may not be thinking the samethings that you are about the relationship

That's what the problem is. I want to sit down and talk to him face to face, but it's so hard to get any time with him. I only see him like once every couple weeks anymore. I don't want to talk to him about all this over the phone or on chat or anything, you know?

Trust your gut feeling. When it comes to what is important in life, one makes time available. A relationship is about as important as it gets and he's not making putting a relationship up very high on his priority list. He'll no doubt give you every excuse in the world as to why he's so busy, but that's all you'll ever get, excuses. You'll always come in second place to something more important to him.

If you have to do it over the phone for your piece of mind, then do it that way - that's just my opinion. I have a bad habit of over analyzing too and it's better to get an answer and quick - you're doing more damage to yourself probably than is warranted.

Good luck,and no matter what, you'll be OK

I agree.......make him chase you down!!!

But should I really be top priority after only 4 months? His kids and job and family should come before I do, I think. If this was a year later, and I was involved with his children, then I think it'd be different. I just want to know what he's feeling about me, I guess, and the only way to know that is to ask him.

If there is something going on and he does not want to hurt you...maybe you should give him an OUT. Talk to him and let him know that if he is losing interest you would rather know about it so you can decide where to go from there, or if he is truly too busy to steel the time to talk now, that you understand that and may be able to help with his hectic burden if given the opportunity to do so.

1-800-GypsyKnows

Well it is summertime and he does have 5 kids so maybe he's busy doing stuff with them as well as working too. But listen to the other poster, if you have to discuss it on the phone or in chat, then do it. At least you'll get some kind of idea of what is going on.

I need a relationship perido.....lol hopefully that special someone will come soon<3

YUP!!

either he is too busy, unwilling or incapable of maintaining good communication about the relationship. not good for longer term prospects. relationships need tending. if there is a big mismatch in this area in your relationship it is best to discover it early because it is likely to continue to be a problem sorry to say...

You bet you should be his top priority after four months. If you're not, then he has too many things going on in his life. If that's his choice, then he should be devoting his time to his other things, rather than starting up a relationship.

I've seen this in other guys and I've even done it myself. I divorced years ago when my four kids were young. My family and work always came first. That's life when you choose a man with kids. Their family/work will always come first and you'll always feel like an outsider. You'll get lots of promises, but you'll never get the time for the relationship you want. Just my own experience speaking.

Well obviously after 4 mos the crazy passionate flame that burns when you first 'discover' each other is going to simmer to a low consistent boil .. if it didn't it would burn out & you would too LOL.

And he may have just fallen into the 'comfort zone' ..

BUT if it bothers you (and it would me even after said words above) I would say something.

Sometimes just mentioning you miss talking the way you used to or such .. is all you need to fan the flame again.