Id consider myself a deist although there is a spiritual side of me that instills a bit more faith. anyway the point is i just had a terrible break up and finding it extremely hard to turn the other cheek so to speak. I dont feel its right to harbor such anger and grudger even though I was wronged but boy I cant turn it off. I wish could just "forgive and forget" and would actually like to but my emotions just wont let it happen.

You are human. You must go through stages of grief, which includes anger stuff. Doesn't make you any less of a good person or less of a deist. Let yourself be!!

Give it time. I think you'd be abnormal if you weren't feeling anger at what happened.

Its hard to forgive when you can't forget. Nice thing about getting old is that, "Hmmm, I was going to say something."

Just remember that anger will destroy the vessel that holds it.

Do something to vent. Anger is actually a step up from depression or hopelessness.

JB

Yeah, learn how to *****. It has helped me a lot.
Roy

I thought I was *****ing correctly when this 19 year old was trying to get on my last nerve. She was trying to tell me how to do my job and I got angry with her. She came in with an attitude and instead of telling her that I didn't need her attitude because I already had an attitude of my own I immediatedly got defensive. Her way of dealing with anger was to not care what others thought. It pissed me off so I told her that my way of deal with others who pissed me off was just to body slam them up against the wall. She told me that was a bit too extreme so we reached a compromise and we got off each others' back. She then told me that she was having a bad day because she was a hour getting late to work and her son was in pain but she had to come to work anyways. If she had her choice I am sure she would have rather been home taking care of her child than being at work. I told her that I was glad she here to help me and we got along fine after that. I am finding the art of *****ing can be harder to learn if one is male but it can be learned.

I agree with this whole heartedly. The anger goes away when we ALLOW ourselves to grieve a loss.

God bless fella....

chin up as they say. It's better to have lived & loved than to never have loved at all. You found love once & you WILL find it again. ("IF" you're worried about betraying your own heart don't give it a second thought.)