Why does my ex continue to think that I'm still together with him. Yeah
I kind of have some feelings for him... but still I continually tell him
it's over and he continues to call.

Tonight he calls and starts talking (I'm barely saying anything but a
random, "uhhuh" and "yeah ok whatever") and then he gets a call on his
other phone and guess who it is??
His little whore.
He tells me he'll call me back and forgets to hang up the phone and
starts talking to her,
"Hola mi amorrr!! Como estas??" (Hi my love, how are you??)
And then I wonder why I continue to let him try and talk himself back to
my heart.

What the hell is my problem?

you still love him!!

You need to forget about him. There is better out there. Toss him to the
curb, and try to move on.

Letting go is hard. There's a certain comfort with someone you've
gotten to know, even when that comfort includes a lot of negative
aspects.

Some people are just really afraid of not having somebody, of being
alone. One lesson I learned from being married, and having a bunch of
really horrible relationships before and after, was that it's better to
be alone than with the wrong person.

I found myself in relationships where I ended up spending 90% of the day
trying to figure a graceful way OUT -- then I knew there was a problem!

There's no point in being with somebody just to be with somebody.
There's no point in hanging on to somebody just because it's a living,
breathing body.

Take a look at yourself, at who you are, and answer this question:
Don't you deserve better than to be treated the way this guy is treating
you?

We both know the answer is YES!!

YOUR A BEAUTIFUL GIRL ERIN ,I'M SURE THERE ARE ALOT OF GUY'S THAT WANT
YOU SWEETIE SO FORGET THAT LOSER.

sometimes you can never see the real picture.
he may think that but you just have to stand your ground

YEA GIRL, YOUR BETTER THEN THAT FORGET HIM HE AIN'T WORTH IT!!
YEA HE IS A LOSER!!!

Yeah, u gotta let that one go. You can accept him back and everything
will be cool for a minute, then bam, right back where u were. Everyone
has to be a firm believer that once a cheater always a cheater

Leave him. He's not even worth the heartache. I'm sure that you can
fined a good guy right on this site. Most of them seems like gentlemen

Erin gurl ask your self this...if he loved you would he be messin with
some hoochie??? If a man , a real man , loves a woman, he stays with her
and doesn't go chasin down the hoochies...he isn't worthy of you
gurl...let his butt be travelin on down the road now....and don't answer
the phone when he calls, why put yourself through the drama and bs

Lex is right it is hard to let go, but there comes a time when we must
be honest with ourselves and walk away. If they make you cry and wonder
why they do the things they do then they are not right for you. He wants
his cake and eat it to presay. You are a beautiful girl don't let him
bring you down, you are a much better person than that. Show him that
his smooth talking will not get anywhere with you anymore tell him to go
be with his other girl and have a nice life. Its time to move on, but...
you are the one that has to make up your mind to leave him in the past
were he belongs and walk with your head up into the future.

Oh man
Yall give some really good advice.

Thanks so much.
And yeah its REALLY hard to let so.
I had to feel sorry for myself for making myself go through it all.

DON'T FEEL SORRY FOR YOUR SELF GIRL,,,
JUST DUMP HIS ASS!!!HE IS NOT GOOD FOR YOU AND YOU KNOW IT
YOUR A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN AND DON'T NEED THAT CRAP!!!

You always have me doll. I'll help you forget old what's his face.

Aww thanks Danee!!

I hate say it like this but... it's a dysfunction in the female
psyche.

And before the lynching begins let me explain it like this: Have
you ever known a guy who buys and old POS car (usually a "muscle" car)?
Does he tell you that he's going to "fix it up... and make it a show car
that everyone's goiung to drool over."? What does that car look like a
year later? It looks the same just rustier!

Well, women are the same, just with guys instead of cars. They
tell you that this guy who cheats/hits them/uses drugs is a really great
guy who they're going to change into someone their girlfriends are just
wishing they could meet. In a year the only thing that's happened is
that they're both a year older (but rarely any wiser) and the staus quo
hasn't moved from center.

I don't know why women are like this, perhaps it's a maternal
instinct trying to "mother" the guy into what they want him to be. The
only thing that you need to know is that a guy can only change himself;
you cannot do it for him! In the end a guy can buy a Chilton's to fix
his POS but there are no books to fix you POS boyfriend.

If this sounds mysoginistic or too cynical I appologize that was
not my intention; but, while there may be exceptions the rule stands
firm. People can only change themselves.

It is hard to say good bye, but if you tell yourself "you deserve
better, you are a bette woman" etc etc you know you'll let go little by
little.

If he has someone else...well, he don't need you.

I learned that. I feel for this guy a while ago, but turned out he wasnt
what i thought. I had to let go..it was hard..I really loved him, still
do..But I realize i have to move on..plenty of fish in the sea as they
say..

derfw3,

I understand, but I've met guys who're like that too. So it's not even
only women. In terms of trying to change my clubbing ways... and make me
into some sort of "housewife type" even though I'm really young. Haha..
So yeah there are definitely exceptions.

& thanks girls for your support!

Don't mistake what I wrote as applying to only women, that's not
what I meant since I know that guys do it too, but rather just
understand that people only change if they want to. Also, don't change
just to please someone else either since you never know what the future
holds. Does that mean you shouldn't pick up you shoes instead of
letting them drop where they may? No, but trying to stop going clubbing
and turning into a "housewife type" won't make you happier (though it
might make who you're with happier) it'll only make you miserable and in
the end you'll end up resenting them.

Having said all those things (including the previous post) don't
change; you seem like a thoughtful and mature (attractive too) young
woman. To give you some advice from a song "Don't be reckless with
other people's hearts; don't put up with those who are reckless with
your's."