Larry gets home late one night and his wife, Linda, says, "'Where
in the hell have you been?"

Larry replies, "I was out getting a tattoo."

"A tattoo?" she frowned, "What kind of tattoo did you get?"

"I got a hundred dollar bill on my penis," he said proudly.

"What the hell were you thinking?" she said, shaking her head
in disdain. "Why on earth would an accountant get a hundred
dollar bill tattooed on his penis?"

"Well, one, I like to watch my money grow. Two, once in a while
I like to play with my money. Three, I like how money feels in my
hand. And, lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay
right here at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want."

Larry is recovering in room 232 at Johns Hopkins Hospital

Larry had always heard of people lighting cigars with 100 dollar bills, but had never seen it...until now.