No problem mate.

And here I was thinking I was normal.

J/k.

More activity, another shameless bump.

WELL FEAR,
HERE'S HOW I LOOK AT LOVE, IT COMES IN MANY FORMS, AND SOMETIMES THE NON-ROMANTIC FULFILLS MORE THAN THE ROMANTIC DOES, AND I THINK THAT IS BECAUSE THERE ARE LESS EXPECTATIONS IN THAT.

MOST OF MY FRIENDS ARE GUYS, AND I LOVE THEM TO DEATH, BUT IF ONE DOESN'T CALL FOR A FEW DAYS, I'M NOT SWEATING OVER IT. IF THEY ARE FRIENDS WITH ANOTHER GIRL, AGAIN I DON'T WORRY MYSELF SICK WONDERING IF THEY ARE 'CHEATING' ON OUR FRIENDSHIP.

BASICALLY ONCE YOU START SLEEPING WITH SOMEONE, THE RULES OF ENGAGEMENT CHANGE.

Sorry for the yelling.......

Why does everyone yell at me.

Bump...interested in people's opinion...and I don't want to write it all over again.

are we happy yet ?

Never!





Meh, slightly...

BGB's happiness in'a bag

I know I already posted but I talk alot so here goes. A loving relationship takes work on both sides. Things never fall into place like we would like. One must be willing to work at it together and make things work out. Noone is perfect and we all have to love the other for their faults as well as their good qualities.

I am trying moreso to figure out why love fails. Where down the road does one suddenly stop loving someone? This happens time and time again in marriage, they say the vow "till death do we part" which means unconditional love (I.E. neverending). So why is it five years later one or both partners stop loving each other? Did it just go away? If so, how? Why?

unconditional (correct me if I'm wrong please) means without conditions. From what I know that kind of love only exist between mother and child. Romantic love, in my favorite definition which comes from Eric Fromm's "The art of loving" is 100% care & concern for the spiritual growth and welfare of whom you claim to love. Mr Fromm also goes on to point out that the key word here is "claim" because it's up to each of us subjectivly to decide whether we experience or feel that love and if it's sufficiant to us and our needs.

no...love's not fair, it's not ever going to be fair...

is it worth it ? After all...it requires everything but promises nothing... heckifIknow... But looking for it, hoping that you've actually found it & then nurturing it from thence forth, to my mind, is sure better than the alternative...which is giving up, becoming bitter and pessimistic... No thanks, I'd rather be the happy fool than the wise and sage grump...

jmo

I'm by no means bitter...matter of fact I'm not even grumpy most of the time. It's just my honest view that love does not truly exist as it once did, and possibly cannot exist like it once did. I hold out hope that one day it can, but this also goes with the hope that one day I will understand where and why it fails.

ditto

don't read what ? ditto what ? huh ?

Everything is contextual, isn't it?

I think love is finding the person with whom you can grow and change in any context. (Tricky stuff, eh?)

love doesn't fail, love does however change. People fail, love does not.

????

Like it once did?? The relationship between man and woman has always been a difficult one, times are not different in that sense. Gender roles have changed a bit causing confusion where there wasn't any before.

Love in it's different degrees is one part of the issue. Being in love and not having it evolve into real love is one problem that exists, also the commitment to the relationship is another. We make the vows to love the person forever while we are in the throes of "in love" and then when that wears off which it does, we need to have a base of the real love to carry through. Also a vow to love another is not just the vow to love the other but also the vow to make the commitment to the relationship. The relationship is the two parts together not just the one or the other. The relationship is in a sense is it's own commitment. The relationships that last are the ones that make the two separate entities into one, the relationship, and they commit to it. These parties see themselves as separate but also one together, that is what makes it last.

Or at least that is how I have seen what I have seen with the enduring couples.

I think real love is always unconditional. Love with conditions isn't love at all..it's merely expectation.

Love doesn't require two people. Love is how you feel about someone, whether they return it or not..whether they even know about it or not.

Love is also not and "on/off" thing.. There are varying degrees of love, and a multitude of kinds of love. I love chocolate, I love my mom, I love my kids.. I love watching survivorman.

I think feelings of love can fade.. or grow stronger..

The big problem I see in many relationships is that sometimes the people aren't in love with each other as much as they are in love with the idea of what the relationship could be. The problem comes later when they realize it wasn't love.. just expectation.