Honesty...is the master KEY
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I joined this site in hope of getting to know more people! and may be to find somebody to bond with and eventually to share my life with, but what is going on?? isn't there any body with the same view on this site? I haven't found one yet!! I went to another site just to see what it was like there! I will let you know if the response and ppl are better or not. Good luck with your search, maybe you will have better luck then me! |
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I believe that comment works both ways. No one is completely honest because no one wants to get hurt. No one wants to settle either. I have many friends that are females that more concerned on what the guy looks like than how he treats her. But it works the same way with men. We all need to find a happy medium. An say it like it is. I defiently agree with you! I am one of those who falls for personality 100% of the time!!! You can be the hottest guy in the world, but still be the uglest because of your personailty! |
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Edited by
gatkinson
on
Mon 04/13/09 12:58 PM
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I am a single dad of two great teen girls. In the last few years I have yet to date a woman that is worthy of a second date! They are all to self indulged, and incapable of anything more than a superficial relationship. Like you they are only interested in what I can do for them. How I can fit into their lifestyle. They are so wrapped up in looking for the faults in others, that they have escalated themselves (at least in their own minds) to the status of “Perfect Woman”. You do not lump people into one big category! If I have learned anything from my girls, it is that you deal with people one at a time (as individuals) and if that person isn’t someone you care to continue seeing, you move on until you find exactly what you are looking for. If you don’t find that perfect person, you where never meant to. I personally have never had sex with a woman that I didn’t have a deep emotional attachment to. If you are finding nothing but one night standers, maybe you are hanging with the wrong crowd. I am finding them saying they are single period.. then finding they are married or living with a women. I want to find where in my ad that is says I am looking for that... so that I can change it! |
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I am a single dad of two great teen girls. In the last few years I have yet to date a woman that is worthy of a second date! They are all to self indulged, and incapable of anything more than a superficial relationship. Like you they are only interested in what I can do for them. How I can fit into their lifestyle. They are so wrapped up in looking for the faults in others, that they have escalated themselves (at least in their own minds) to the status of “Perfect Woman”. You do not lump people into one big category! If I have learned anything from my girls, it is that you deal with people one at a time (as individuals) and if that person isn’t someone you care to continue seeing, you move on until you find exactly what you are looking for. If you don’t find that perfect person, you where never meant to. I personally have never had sex with a woman that I didn’t have a deep emotional attachment to. If you are finding nothing but one night standers, maybe you are hanging with the wrong crowd. See my step one: The truth comes out here: "I personally have never had sex with a woman that I didn’t have a deep emotional attachment to." The rest is all about telling the female what she wants to hear into order to get in her pants.... Let's stop playing games with women...give them honesty! Double AMEN on that |
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Topic:
So why is it....
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I don't really see the point in complaining about how certain threads don't stick around. If you like one, put effort into keeping it going. It it goes away, it goes away. Ye gads. Here we go again. Do I have to explain to everyone ( not you in particular ) again that when I post something like this I am NOT " complaining "?? I stated something that I have observed, and I wondered why it happened. It's just that simple. [/quote I defiently have to agree with your post. I opened a thread for advise and help and bashed for saying men....so I got trashed for not say some men. It was taken that I meant all men. Then was told I was back peddling.... All I wanted was some advise on what I was saying or posting wrong to only pick up married men or ones that wanted a one nighter. I will never open another thread after that... to much bashing and idiots in this site to get a honest anything! Well...if you have a question that you would like some honest advice on, you can either email me, or you can post the question in the Just Ask JustAGuy thread. I answer the questions posted there to the best of my ability. I don't pull punches when someone asks for advice, though. I give them an answer, even though they may not like what I have to say. And therein, the problem lies. Too many people only want others to post what they WANT to hear (read), not what they NEED to hear (read). They'll say they want honest answers, but when you give them exactly what they're asking for, they have the nerve to get pissed off, and then continue to whine about it. NO one said it had to be sugar coated.... bashing is not helping it is called being rude and very unnecessary. Saying someone is a slut is not necessary if you don't know the anything about them.... Its called having tact and if you can't add to the thread without being a crued idiot then just keep your bitterness to your self! Thank you for tell me abou the Just ask a guy.... I am still new to this dating site thing! |
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Topic:
So why is it....
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I don't really see the point in complaining about how certain threads don't stick around. If you like one, put effort into keeping it going. It it goes away, it goes away. Ye gads. Here we go again. Do I have to explain to everyone ( not you in particular ) again that when I post something like this I am NOT " complaining "?? I stated something that I have observed, and I wondered why it happened. It's just that simple. I defiently have to agree with your post. I opened a thread for advise and help and bashed for saying men....so I got trashed for not say some men. It was taken that I meant all men. Then was told I was back peddling.... All I wanted was some advise on what I was saying or posting wrong to only pick up married men or ones that wanted a one nighter. I will never open another thread after that... to much bashing and idiots in this site to get a honest anything! |
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Why is it men post they are looking for long term relationships, but only want a one nighter? I just want someone who is honest about what they are looking for why is that so difficult to find? I am looking for someone who is real, no games, no drama just pure hoensty... but is not cruel! Theres is a difference in being honest and just being rude.... rudeness is not necessary to be honest! I don't blame you, it's not asking for much is it? Every now & then one of us honest guys are having to meet a wall that a lady has had to put up to be careful because of that sorta thing. I have met some nice mean they are just married or gay! I keep hoping I do find one of those men out there! Thank you for your response and good luck on your search! Dont give up we are out here still searching for special women with old fashioned values, class, and finese. Its unfortunate that most people classify sex as just 'a given' because they are dating. Sure who doesnt like a good romp in the hay or between the sheets every know and again? That isnt what this about..gatkinson feels betrayed by men in general I think because she hasnt come across the right one yet. Keep going girl you will find one that will treat you the way you deserve like a princess and not a tramp. I think you are RIGHT.... thank you for a honest response... I wish you luck in finding what you are searching for!!! |
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Why is it men post they are looking for long term relationships, but only want a one nighter? I just want someone who is honest about what they are looking for why is that so difficult to find? I am looking for someone who is real, no games, no drama just pure hoensty... but is not cruel! Theres is a difference in being honest and just being rude.... rudeness is not necessary to be honest! I don't blame you, it's not asking for much is it? Every now & then one of us honest guys are having to meet a wall that a lady has had to put up to be careful because of that sorta thing. I have met some nice mean they are just married or gay! I keep hoping I do find one of those men out there! Thank you for your response and good luck on your search! |
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Since "men" was stated in the OP, this infers to me that you were clearly meaning the entire gender, regardless of how hard you tried to backpedal afterward. You should've thought about what you were writing and should've chosen your words more carefully before hitting the Post button. With that said, I'm curious as to how long it took you to survey all the men in the world to reach this conclusion. Incidentally, I don't remember being surveyed about it. As you state....I said men...NOT ALL MEN!!! Dang I wish ppl could read! |
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Edited by
gatkinson
on
Wed 04/01/09 11:14 AM
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Yes I did say MEN...I didn't say ALL men. It was a open, wanted input on how to decifier the code of men. Thought ppl would be willing to give me insight, since I had been in the dating scene since I was in the seventh grade. I was not attacking men, was only asking for help....not to berate ego or mess with anyones testostrone. I am human and was looking for advise not critism or cruel quotes. Thanks to all the wonderful help you have all been next time don't help... But thank you to the ones who really did give a true response and not a self hating statement!
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Edited by
gatkinson
on
Tue 03/31/09 12:36 PM
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Ive put out........ the washing, the dinner ..and the cat.. LOL.... Thats 100% Right!! |
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Edited by
gatkinson
on
Tue 03/31/09 12:25 PM
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I've been known to put out.... That is your choice.... everyone is different! I want more so I wait to see what they are truly like! |
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Edited by
gatkinson
on
Tue 03/31/09 12:23 PM
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I mean if every man you've met has done this to you as you claim then maybe you're part of the problem. Maybe you just make bad choices in men to trust and if you choose differently you might get different results. Oh silly, silly man - you're asking WAY too much. Admit error AND accept responsibility? You can't possibly be serious, can you? Then you will be waiting a very long time... Because as far as a sob story that would be none of you business. I chalk it up to we didn't click and move on. Just wanted some insight on why men are putting they are looking for long term but seem to be wanting sex. They are putting they are single and looking for long term. But three of them I have met... I found out they were married and four of them where living with a women already. That is all I meant by the orginal statement |
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Haven't you ever heard of the phrase, " men don't know what they want?" It's true, we don't. I'm not actually talking about myself, but men in general. Every man wants that one night stand, that challenge, so don't let them fool you. We can be one of the nicest guys in the world and still 80 percent of the time we're thinking about sex. The problem with some women is that they think the longer they hold out on sex, the more the man is going to love them in the long run. Trust me when I say that it doesn't matter, because the outcome is going to be the same. Either we like it or we don't. More importantly, I think it comes down to how sex was, what did she look like with out makeup, does she have a nice personality, and is she going to hound me once it's over. My advice is to just be your self and don't come off like you like him to much. This way if he doesn't like you for you, then he's not worth your time. btw, of course men are going to write that in thier profiles, " serious relationships", b/c we don't want to attract the wrong type of girls. Thanks for being honest guess better to just give up and stay a single mom !! |
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Why is it men post they are looking for long term relationships, but only want a one nighter? I just want someone who is honest about what they are looking for why is that so difficult to find? I am looking for someone who is real, no games, no drama just pure hoensty... but is not cruel! Theres is a difference in being honest and just being rude.... rudeness is not necessary to be honest! Don't 'put out' on a first date.... it isn't rocket science. Since you can't seem to read, I thought I should point out that several times during this blog I states I DO NOT PUT OUT!!!! I have real valvues and belive in waiting! I am saying men put I am looking for long term relationships and when they don't get sex that night they play the game. Yes I know not all men are this way!!! I am learning that I think I rather go back to just not looking and being happy then trying find a real man in the messed up world!! |
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Edited by
gatkinson
on
Tue 03/31/09 10:19 AM
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First of ALL for the PEOPLE who can't READ.... I DO NOT PUT OUT on the first date never and have never had a one night stand. I have good old time values. MOST.... not all men I date lately have been this way.... I have been married for 15 years before the last 3 years of being divorced. So I know who I am and what I am looking for and my personality....So before you start jumping on a ban wagon condemning me.... maybe ppl should talk to me and see all the good I do! I volunteer to teach ppl how to use the computer, volunteer at the library and volunteer my free time and help with the homeless. I donate time and money to buying things for less fortunite then I....not saying I am loaded but I would give up having some thing for me, if some else was in real need. I have worked in the medical field for 15 years taking care of ppl. I would give the shirt off my back for a total stranger. I was raised to respect myself and others! It takes men a month or more to get into my pants.
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Edited by
gatkinson
on
Mon 03/30/09 04:16 PM
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What do mean change my critera? I feel I put out there what I am looking for and they should learn to read what we are looking for and respect that.... when you message someone look at more then there pic... see what they have to say and what they are looking for!
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Well then I amend that sentence to... men that I met on here or talk to... or somewhere else say they want more from me... and then play games! I just one to show me that they all aren't out for a piece!
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I have to agree so far this site or any of them have not brought out the best in men. I change my profile regularly just to see what attracts each type!
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