LoL Thank You!

I think this is where my "confusion" comes into play and why I posted my story in the relationship advice forum. I was just looking for opinions because sometimes a fresh new perpective can enlighten a person.

LoL thank you that is the first time I have smiled all week

actually I have read through many of the topics here and the people seemed nice :\ so yes I did.

In September 2008, I met the love of my life, my one true love. Though our meeting was rather unconventional, with him being deployed to Afghanistan, we were able to talk many hours and really get to know one another. We discovered that we had so much in common, were so much alike in many ways and most of all, we became best friends.

Some place among all the conversations, laughs, arguments and tears, I fell in love. He was thousands of miles away and still the closest thing I had. We would talk everyday, sometimes for 4 or 5 hours at a time. We made plans for his homecoming in May 2009. Distance only makes the heart grow fonder, as they say and we were living proof.

J**** went through some hard times with work, his health and losing friends and I was always there to lend him love, support, an ear...anything he needed. I went through some hard times with a jealous ex, school and family issues and J**** was there for me, through it all... 100%.

Last week, all of this came crashing down around us, when J**** admitted he had lied to me from the very beginning about a past relationship he had had. He knew from the start all I ever ask for is honesty. He explained to me why he lied and I understand but thinking back over things, I would have understood even if he had told me in the beginning. I asked him several times to tell me the truth and he swore he was. Now I am having trust issues, because he says "believe me" and "it won't happen again" How do I know this when he swore to me all along he was being honest and saying I could "trust him" and I needed to "believe in him" and I did and now he admits he was lying.

I have sat and thought about all of this so long my head hurts. I trusted him more than anyone in my life. I know he means well. I know his intentions were not to hurt me. I have a hard time talking to him now. I feel like MY J**** no longer exists and I miss him so much. I question everything we ever had. I wonder if everything that is coming out of his mouth is genuine. I always thought myself to be a pretty good judge of character and can read people and know when things aren't quite right and I did with him. Now, I am so confused because I used to trust in him so much and he doesn't want things to change but I question his every move, statement and motive.

I don't know if I should give it time and see what happens and get hurt more or chalk it up as a lessoned learned and move on with my life.