http://www.dresdendolls.com/video/index.htm

It's the video at the very bottom.

<b>The Dresden Dolls - Girl Anachronism</b>

<small>you can tell
from the scars on my arms
and cracks in my hips
and the dents in my car
and the blisters on my lips
that i'm not the carefullest of girls

you can tell
from the glass on the floor
and the strings that're breaking
and i keep on breaking more
and it looks like i am shaking
but it's just the temperature
and then again
if it were any colder i could disengage
if i were any older i could act my age
but i dont think that youd believe me
it's
not
the
way
i'm
meant
to
be
it's just the way the operation made me

and you can tell
from the state of my room
that they let me out too soon
and the pills that i ate
came a couple years too late
and ive got some issues to work through
there i go again
pretending to be you
make-believing
that i have a soul beneath the surface
trying to convince you
it was accidentally on purpose

i am not so serious
this passion is a plagiarism
i might join your century
but only on a rare occasion
i was taken out
before the labor pains set in and now
behold the world's worst accident
i am the girl anachronism

and you can tell
by the red in my eyes
and the bruises on my thighs
and the knots in my hair
and the bathtub full of flies
that i'm not right now at all
there i go again
pretending that i'll fall
don't call the doctors
cause they've seen it all before
they'll say just
let
her
crash
and
burn
she'll learn
the attention just encourages her

and you can tell
from the full-body cast
that i'm sorry that i asked
though you did everything you could
(like any decent person would)
but i might be catching so don't touch
you'll start believeing youre immune to gravity and stuff
don't get me wet
because the bandages will all come off

and you can tell
from the smoke at the stake
that the current state is critical
well it is the little things, for instance:
in the time it takes to break it she can make up ten excuses:
please excuse her for the day, its just the way the medication makes her...

i dont necessarily believe there is a cure for this
so i might join your century but only as a doubtful guest
i was too precarious removed as a caesarian
behold the worlds worst accident
I AM THE GIRL ANACHRONISM

I think for my funeral, i don't want a service, i just want a playlist of songs that i loved and for people to just be able to talk about life and the good things. I know, that's what the wake is for, but i want that to be my whole funeral.

Also, for the finale, would have to be 'I'm Going Home' from the Rocky Horror Picture Show soundtrack.

I would suggest pandora as well. You create a playlist based on a band that you like, and you can make as many as you want, and it will introduce you to some good new stuff. =]

I love GWAR, but it's kind of one of those bands that i don't tell my friends i listen to, haha. One of my favorite scenes from a movie is the part in Empire Records where Mark is eating the 'brownies', and he's watching the GWAR video, and they tell him to join the band, then they're going to have to eat him. Love it.

The Tea Party. Also, Crystal Castles. Nobody will probably like them, but i absolutely love them.

My first instinct was to say, 'iiiiinteresting.'

Ha.

Wow, i didn't know about that! That's very interesting, and such a good idea.

And about the same sex thing, i tend to agree. I've been to three female doctor's and one male doctor. I tended to be more comfortable talking to the women. With some people it's different, granted, but i just felt better talking to a woman. My brother went to my female doctor for anger management[we are just a wonderful family, huh? Just kidding! I love my family with all my heart.] and he didn't feel comfortable talking to her, but when he went to the male doctor in the same office, he had a tendency of opening up more. It could've been that he was a male, or maybe he was just that much more comfortable with him as a doctor. Who knows?

One of the coping mechanisms i've found that works best for me is writing. And it doesn't ever have to be anything or anything come out of it, sometimes i will write the most nonsensical paragraph-long run-on sentence, but i feel much better after doing so. Nobody ever has to read it, and sometimes i delete it off my computer afterwards, but it's a better way of getting out my frustration and sadness than a lot of other things.

Your welcome, and it's nice to know that i could help you in some way.

Also, i completely agree with you about the medication not being a cure. I stopped taking all of my medications all-together when i was 18, and i felt so completely better when i was off of them, so i'm still not sure if it was the medication helping, or what. I like to think that it was only partly that, and mostly me learning coping mechanisms, which i use to this day.I did recently go back to my doctor and she wanted to put me back on a low dose of zoloft, because she thinks i've started having anxiety attacks in the form of asthma attacks, but right now i'm trying to see if i can deal with it on my own. There are always options, it's just a matter of finding what works best for you. I went through a couple different neds before i found Trazodone.

I do have to give a word of warning about Ambien though. I know most people are ok on it, and it's a rare side effect, but my grandfather was taking it while he was in the hospital, and he woke up during the middle of the night, cut all his wires, and tried to walk out. He didn't know what he was doing at the time. They said it was a mix of all the medications he was on, but i had an issue with it too. I was prescribed it for Insomnia, and i took the recommended dose, and it did nothing for me. So i took a half pill more, and i couldn't sleep, but i layed in my bed hallucinating for 6 hours. It sounds funny when i say it out loud, but it was scary while it was happening. I was seeing things in the tree outside my window, and i couldn't really move. So just a word of warning to everyone: be careful, and go by reccomended dosages. If you feel it is not working, talk to your doctor before you decide to take more. I made a mistake, and i should have known better.

I know that my relationship with my mother is one thing that keeps me going strong now. We ended up having a serious sit-down[i went to her] and we talked about the issues. Now, i can go to my mother for anything, and that helps me so much. Brandon Lee said it best in The Crow: 'Mother is God in the eyes of a child.' I'm sure your son knows that you love him more than anything, and i'm sure that if he's having trouble talking to you, it's probably just that he thinks you won't understand. I can't speak for him, obviously we are in different situations, but i sincerely hope that he realizes that he doesn't have to go through it alone. And who knows, after all the heavy stuff i've been talking about, he could be perfectly fine. =]

I dealt with clinical depression from a very early age[i'm talking like, 8 years old here], but i wasn't diagnosed until i was 12. I didn't get medication until i was 14, and my parents really started to see how badly it was affecting my life. I ran away from home because i sincerely believed they didn't want me, i tried to commit suicide a total of 5 times, two of which i was hospitalized for, and i was constanly under the impression that i should never speak because i didn't think anyone could ever really care about the way i felt, and yes, i was a cutter, which i still struggle with to this day[i'm 21 now]. Now mine was a severe case of depression, and it could've been prevented earlier, but i dealt with it as it came my way. I was also diagnosed with a couple of other things that i'm sure had some regard to the way i was feeling, but my main issue was the depression. At about age 17, i came to realize that yes, other people could feel the way i was feeling, which is one of the things that honestly made me able to cope a lot better.

In regards to your question of medication. I was put on many different things. Zoloft, Trazodone[which is a sleep aid as well as an anti-depressant], adderall[something for which they never specified why they gave it to me], and quite a few other things. The best for me, honestly, was the Trazodone. I would take it 15 minutes before i would go to bed, and i'd be out like a light, but it didn't leave me with a weird feeling when i woke up. It didn't necessarily make me happy, which is NOT what anti-depressants are meant for, by the way. It just evened out the chemical imbalance that i was having, and i could see situations more clearly. It kind of just made me...normal, which was the point. Zoloft was not really effective on me, but then, every situation is different. There could be different side effects for different people. The best thing you can do is if and when your doctor does decide to prescribe your son medication, if you are worried about it, make sure to ask him to give you as much information about the medication as possible. You have the right to tell him that you don't want your son taking a medication if you are not comfortable with it. They should have samples of whatever medication he would prescribe, which also have little information booklets that tell you what that medication is supposed to do, and the possible side effects.

Also, the best thing you could do is make sure that you have an open communication relationship with your son. Make sure that he knows that you can go to him with any problem that he has, and that you will be understanding. I know that this would have helped me out a lot if i ever thought i had been able to go to either of my parents and say, 'somethings wrong, i need to talk.' If you need to, you should be able to look up signs of depression and suicidality. This is always good information to have on hand, just in case you think a medication is not working, and your son does not say anything.

Feel free to message me or e-mail if you want to talk more, and i hope that i have been of some sort of help. I sincerely hope that your son will be ok, and i'm sure with your help and love he will be. =]

Never cheated. I don't see the point. If you want to be with somebody else that bad, or you want to sleep with other people that bad, then obviously the relationship that you're in doesn't mean that much at all, and it's better to have done with it than to be the cause of the eventual pain. I watched my mom be destroyed by the fact that my dad was cheating on her for months. He didn't want to leave her, because their relationship was convenience to him, and if he left my mom he would've had to go through divorce and all that trouble. It happened anyway, because inevitably my mom found out, and he didn't want to give up his other f*ck. About two years later, the guy i had been with for almost a year, who i was living with, him and his parents, cheated on me. I don't think i've ever been as hurt. I felt like i was the easiest thing in the world to toss aside, i felt like trash, that i wasn't worth the effort to love.

In closing, i hate cheaters. Break up before you go f*ck someone else.

Nothin' but the rain.

Lol, i posted that as a joke. It was a Mike Myers sketch called 'Coffee Talk' with Linda Richman. That was one of my favorite Saturday Night Live skits, but it's good to know that people really do appreciate the music of Duran Duran.

...is neither a Duran, nor a Duran.

Discuss.

My dad's favorite joke is:

Mushroom walks into a bar. Bartender says, 'we don't serve your kind here.' Mushroom says, 'why not? I'm a fun guy!'

Alone at last
together in a photograph.
Our eyes are always open
devoted to perfection through silence.
What am I supposed to do?
Should I sit wait for you?

A recent hit on the radio out here - Fall For You by Secondhand Serenade. I love it. =]

Also, Thunder by Boys Like Girls.

The Spill Canvas's So Much and Under The Covers are really good songs too.

Hum - Stars

She thinks she missed the train to Mars, she's out back counting stars.
She thinks she missed the train to Mars, she's out back counting stars.

She's not at work, she's not at school,
she's not in bed, I think I finally broke her.
I bring her home everything I want, and nothing that she needs.

I thought she'd be there holding daisies, she always waits for me.
She thinks she missed the train to Mars, she's out back counting stars.

I found her out back sitting naked looking up and looking dead.
A crumpled yellow piece of paper, with seven nines and tens.

I thought she'd be there holding daisies, she always waits for me.
She thinks she missed the train to Mars, she's out back counting stars.

I thought you'd be there holding daisies, you always wait for me.
She thinks she missed the train to Mars, she's out back counting stars.

Sleeping Sickness by City In Colour.

Black Cadillac - Modest Mouse.