snotty nose rez kids @ fineline mpls, mn

they ain't half bad live and i usually feel very underwhelmed and unimpressed with hip hop in a live setting

Sorry, back on topic literally, i feel very sapio-demiromantic as I won't develop feeling for those that aren't able to show some level of intellect, I am strongly attracted to someone who uses words creatively, especially in writing. Creatively constructed prose, or a well worded note can litterally give me butterflies. My last partner, who's still one of my very dear friends and such an amazing human, her and I found ourselves both highly focused on career and self exploration and self love, separately yet for very similar reasons. We only really had time to text, or communicate via email while at our respective jobs. She was an education admin and I oversaw brewing operations at a small brewery here. Neither gig allows for much phone use while working. Early on we began an email exchange along with texting here and there, and very quickly these emails that were about various nerdery like our shared love of rocks and minerals and our personal rock collections. This is when I began feeling more than platonic for her (we'd hung out in a friend group before and on a couples date once while with other persons) and had never flirted, I know i didn't thiunk of her in any way and did't feel like she saw me as more. But hearing this super intelligent lady talk about minerals she's found or where to locate gorgeous agates locally was winning my heart big time. That was mutual, though I think it was the secondary emailing that got her heart thumping. I am a writer, and even when working in the beer industry I've freelanced, I love it but I like to write stories and poetry most of all, and she asked me if I'd email her something I'd written. I went above and began an open ended tale of love set in a world akin to 10th or 11th century northern europe though the land was a fictional place. At this stage I was aware of her artistic leanings and interest in expanding her creative writing, and that she was a fan of Tolkien who, lord, I just have loved all of his tales since I learned to read. Truly a wizard of words was he. So my tale was catered to my abilty and her interests and loves, an of course the main character duo was based on us.... I wrote what was a long introductory chapter that was mostly background info and building the me character a bit and only introducing the idea of this other character he knew of. Then ended it with a "now your turn...." And so it began. I still have all these emails, i just looked to jog the ol' thinker.... we went back and forth for 7 months until shortly after we were living together and madly in love. The first three of those too busy to see one another more than I feel like it was 4-5 times, and only for brief dates. We met in July, so midsummer here and mid june thru august is the busiest time for breweries, all the outdoor fests are packed into our very short summer so I would be working 10-12 hours 7 days a week and brewing a batch most weekdays, along with fermentation managment and packaging as i only had 1 part time assistant and a bartender who was training into a packaging role. Brutal. She had a project with her school board sourcing a specific grant that was crucial in her district in order tot keep their special ed program funded along with some other grant apps that I gather are the norm and bread and butter, so she was working full time and had personal obligations that she wouldnt have time for once school began ad educators were back to full plus 25% time per union contract. Our emails and our back and forth writing project was what had the two of us so giddy in new love by the time our schedules settled and we had an actual no time pressure date. We began this meeting at a local waterfall (minnehaha falls, stunning if interested in googling). She grew up in the outer burbs with urbanophobic parents so have little knowledge of Minneapolis, so I wanted to show her the falls. Its amaze an super romantic on an early autumn late arvo (yes, I speak a bit of aussie, thought you'd get a kick). So picturesque setting, standing on the footbridge right above the fall, is where I was when I sent her the pin to find me. We embraced, pulled back, with little hesitation (we both get shy despite both being absolute chatterboxes) but we profess that we're clearly falling in love as we begin our stroll down to the path that leads from the falls to where the creek empties into the Mississippi, where it overlooks the last of three falls on the Miss here in th cities. There we share our first not just a quick goodnight kiss and man, it made my body tingle it was so magical. Mind you I am in my late-ish 30s at this point, had been married, had a long term prior to meeting my wife and as i'll explain in another post sometime, have a much broader set of sexual attraction than intellectual stimualtion.

That's my most recent and profound demiromantic experience. I can detail the friendship following our split, which is a very deep, complicated and valued one for both of us. Our bond and friendship will be lifelong and it began it's bloom from very casual acquaintence to omg I can't stand being apart for the WHOLE workday 5+ yr love affair into the most meaningful friendship and sibling like bond I've had. And I am good friends with both my sibbies too.

Cheers mate,
thanks for being brave and getting this topic out here. Maybe you and I can spark more important discussions relating to human connections here, I feel a very one worldview vibe and i'm all about inclusivity and safe space for all as well as deconstructing harmful or outdated standards which are rampant in both of our nations if what I know of the land down under is accurate. Take care, man. I look forward to hearing your take, honestly most men I know dont share and I have minimal close male friends due to some of the things I feel need dismantling and my penchant for calling out toxic masculinity whenever it presents. (i'm sure you'll see that here, more, maybe with "sex brain guy"

Yes, Prince Rogers Nelson, his given name, was an AMAZING guitar player and his voice, while debatable if its good musically or not, was one of a kind. His greatest asset was neither. It was that he had a sage-like way of making very cookie-cutter pop sound like noting else one the radio at the time he released it. His keen eye for the hot trend in pop at any given time, and recorded song that were unique enough to be distinct and stand out amongst the other copypop while remaining safe enough to not be relegated into the "obscure" non-pop categories on the Billboard charts... He was a wizard in knowing how to repeat it over and over and not end up a one hit wonder like many other's who follow safely instead of taking risks.

One could say that the result of his methodology was the same as his peers who released edgier pop or rock and pushed genres forward. As a guitarist i'd say that last part holds true only when speaking to accolade, I can't say I have heard another guitarist state him as an influence on their playing, I certainly wouldn't say he influenced mine despite many of his contemporaries like Johnny Marr and Robert Smith are massively influential on my approach to the guitar and use of fx. Hell, those two started bands around the time i was born, The Cure released a record Nov. '24 that went straight to #1 on the rock charts with 4 singles in the top 20 at the same time, the band will celebrate their 50th year next year. Marr & Morrissey both made and murdered The Smiths, and the media hyped beef between Morrissey and Robert Smith is silly because to do what Rob does, Morrissey needed Marr, who he was awful to. But I'm hard pressed to say if Robert Smith is better or more successful that Marr. The Cure is no doubt my favorite band of all time. Johnny Marr has been lead guitarist for Modest Mouse almost 25 years and obvi for all of the Smiths life. Both bands are solid top 10 all time faves of mine. Modest Mouse was super underground until Marr joined, he knew how to keep it weird while making it accessible to not weird ppl.

And now that we have fully taking this thread into the elsewhere, I'll full circle back to Mr. Jimi Hendrix and His Experience, who I got into funny enough because of my love of the Cure even in middle school (this mighta been freshman yr tho). I had gotten a Hendrix Tribute CD from my uncle, because it was covers by alot of big alt rock and hard rock artist including the Cure's superb and very Cure-esque cover of Purple Rain that was the first song on the tribute. Funny how that worked. and how influence and inspiration spawn many things. Like the OP, Prince, unlike TAFKAP, spawning an exchange about music by introducing himself after, i think maybe a bit of time travel....

(i hope no locals see this, i'll be hunted if they do. prince (not OP prince, TAFKAPrince) is a god here in minneapolis)

On the topic of exploitation of vulnerable and/or marginalized ppl. 100% agree and that side of the sex industry is appalling and I'd like very much to see it eradicated poste haste, and it's victims given means to recover and flourish after facing such trauma

That said, I feel looking at sex work and sex workers as a binary, or black and white issue can be harmful as well. Yes, huge number are trafficked and worse, but many are also choosing to and working independently for numerous reasons personal to them. Hate, i feel, overall is strong. Hate the cartel for sure, but have empathy and compassion for the workers. Trafficked or choosing to work. And to the chosen, it's their livelihood, regardless of itsto feel their family or support their vices, if someone is making a living at it, consentually, that's fine by me. Do I patronize the industry, aside from watching porn, which is the same industry with the same issues, No i don't. But I am aware that many adult film starts moonlight as escorts, and that's great. I would were i able. I also pay mind to stay away from that which is clearly exploiting trafficked humans.

I also have a couple friends, several honestly if adult film is part of it, who are employed in the sex industry. All enthusiasticlly so. All like what they do. Two of these friends are escorts, independant meaning a service or individual isn't taking anything off the top (pimping), which is a risk, especially for women, so they often have a chapperone and tip the chapperone for the work. By tip I mean the chapperone is given only what the escort deems appropriate even if the tip is $0, or a meal or whatever. Thats the differentiator. Having chapperoned for one of these friends a good deal because we were housemates and I had vehicle, I have had a lot of insight and experience with how it works. And yes, my friend always tipped nicely tho I would've been fine just knowing she was safe and could have me knocking her room withing 60 seconds if a john was trying to not pay or worse (both happen a good deal, until another male appears, then only once did i see a john not immediately comply without issue). My point in all this is to show how not black and white this, or any other issue honestly, is not. Sex workers, whether one likes that its a thing or not, are going to be working in the sex industry and whether they are doing so by choice or under threat merely changes the approach taken to meet their needs. Trfficking humans is a violation of human rights and I feel the methods in the I said before would be productive, but I've yet to see cartels that didn't have LE on payroll, so there's some issues implementing a plan to take cartels down. Whole different issue, but i digress. When it comes to those choosing, consenting, to sex work, they benefit from one, understanding their line of work and the issues they face. Criminalization leads to all sorts of problems and has yet to fix any. Providing space, or safety for both workers and their chapperones to operate within the bounds of reasonable law and having reasonable law in place for that to happen. Punishing, via the criminal courts, johns who violate law just as you'd punich one for not paying for any service or for assaulting a provider of a service. Also punishing pimps (some one who demands a rate for protection, often then explooiting or abusing the worker on top of robbing then by threat or strong arm).

sadly, what the binary, or this or that nothing else approach has done is often only punishes the most innocent involved, the sex worker themself. it's like arresting or shaming a hair stylist in doing hair were crfiminalized and ppl getting their hair did here taking advantge of stylists. It's the exact opposite of logical thinking and lets be brutally honest here, the vast majority of sex workers are women and an overwhelmingly number of johns are men regardless of the workers gender, and the overall view of sex work is the workers should be shamed because they're "unclean women" (who get paid by men of all walks of life including those that make the law and enforce the law, fact) so of course its the womens fault right? or maybe the industry itself is victim to the whole poopshow of patriarchy and likely wouldn't be a thing if men weren't so hell bent on everything involving women being about their penis. So, instead of hate, maybe empathy, understanding, the men patronizing sex workers being better humans and when asking for a service respect the boundaries of those providing it, society stop being f'n hypocrites and shaming or criminalizing things it also patronize. Bottom line point here is, sure dislike the industry thats great, doesn't mean jack black diddly smack. the industry is not ever going to go away as long as a large percentage of men value sex more than, well anything else.... i see that happening, um, not ever.... don't patronize the industry if you don't like it. I don't like big box department stores so I don't shop there, but i support their employees in fighting for full time and living wage, or benefits. i support small business and local proprietors who's bottom line is harmed by walmart addiction. actively support not just saying my feelers. If i just hated it what good would that do? i mean, i get to be in my feels about it, woo hoo!

When one truly doesn't like a thing, for valid reason because the OP is valid AF for why they hate sex work. But valid as they are, that doesn't do anything for something that ish't going away and has mad problems all over it. hate dehumanizes the most human of work. No empthay perpetuates the issues that are hated. Hating while only understanding the exsistence and not the humans and the details actually just perpetuates the problem, counterproductive to be quite frank, is just saying "oh I hate this thing make it stop" while (only assuming OP, if you'e involved in meaningful effort I am very sorry. also, if you are lets talk cuz me too) doing nothing more does more harm than keeping your opinion to yourself. oh and no more porn watching if you hate it, unless words and actions not aligning is ok with you.

I hope there's insight gained from my soap box rant. Too often do i see someone who isnt aware of how the system only harms the most innocent of the industry while the rest are viewed as victims somehow. Cuz sex workers make johns do it... or logical thinking. smh I know I am snarky and if I have offended anyone with my words or with my inside knowledge, i respectfully am not sorry. I don't make people choose to not understand this and it didn't take me helping a friend in the industry to get all of what I said, getting what I said made me willing to help my friend. I snark because frankly I see empathy and understanding the same way i see common sense, everyone has the abilities, some make the choice not tot implement them. OP, my comments arent really at you except where addressed, they are at the problem your words and the ones like them represent. I mean no offense and if you do truly dislike the industry strongly enough to use a term that i feel is a feeling ad powerful and takes as much effort as love does. hate is opposite day love. If you truly hate it, take effort to make it something you don't hate. I don't hate the industry, but i do hate many of the ills it breeds; exploition, R@pe, robbery, extortion, forced addiction, kidnapping, and many more. I chapperoned to help a friend, to help the industry become safer and less stigmatized I volunteer to pass out safe use and chem test supplies, I volunteer and donate to shelters in my area, I advocate fo the victims obviously, but actually provide study materials and speak to the public and have spoken with law enforcement and offered materials but well, ya know. I wish i could do more, but while it's illegal its not like theres storefronts and stuff, and in this platform i refrain from going into other things I have participated in with the goal of a safe and legal workspace for those who want to work in the industry. The least one can do is to petition for a ballot question to legalize it or decriminalize it. then vote to end criminalization. Legalization is ideal, as no one gets arrested just for acting in the work or paying for it. decriminalizing will keep workers safe from arrest, johns will be arrested and prosecuted just for agreeing to pay ir they are caught. johns are the least of anyones concern. More action, less hate!! yeah. thanks for keeping me comany on my rants lets all be the best us we can every day!

Don't forget those of us who identify as NHI's. You know we're officially here now....




also, i think if you just use your google acct as login instead of email+password it doesn't give you a ReCaptcha to prove ya real. at least I have only gotten one when doing the email+password method. ymmv

You sir, have figured out the key to enlightenment. There's some non AI's here, but if they're women they are going to ask you for an Apple card soon as they think they gotcha interest... y'know, the hasn't-changed-in-years scam cartel makes some of it's trafficking vic's do.... sad, it's why I hesitate to pay for dating apps. this site seems to do a decent job chasing the AI bots quick, prob a feature written into the coding to detect/eject AI, but you'll quickly learn all the profiles being op'd by scammers within 30 mins in the match/meet platform. there are the occasional genuine human out there, very few and far between, especially outside of the message board/"social media" area

Hey Nina, I just "hearted" your profile, if you wanna chat do the same on mine so we match. If not, happy searching and best luck :)

Hmmm, I s'pose I am not aware of the platform's origin story.... so it was originally a social/message board thing? Then added dating to keep with trend or did i read you backwards? lol I do that at times. What was the original name? Just Mingle or something completely different?

Thanks for the info. Much appreciated. :)

Thanks for clarifying, I am also on other platforms, some are better than others for sure. Appreciate your insights, helps pad out the pro/con list lol... have a great rest of your Sunday funday :)

thank you SO much for your helpful advice, very thoughtful and relevant. Tho I wonder if you misunderstood my post or just projecting some stuff online.... I'm aware of the apps availability, and that people around the world access that availability. I am also aware of how these profiles we have show a users location, and given my stated intent, I only interact with those around here. Those are also the only ones I plan to.... perhaps rereading the OP and comprehending that I was inquiring as to the experiences longer term users here as I signed up only two months ago. While reading, pls denote how many times I say ANYTHING pertaining to things involving my "little head" (very telling that you'd refer to a penis as such) But I digress, idk why you're a grumpy old man, but it ain't my issue. Now have a great sunday, now run along and play, maybe lil tug on your "lil head" will release some endorphins and lift your mood.

fyi guys, you're all doing this over a deleted ai bot... smh

pls try to be better. trust me, a little humility and class will get you farther than all this desparation and thirst

ikr!

idk whats worse, the sadness or the thirst.

idk, i sure hope so even tho I often get discouraged by reality. I've yet to completely give up to the idea... Until then, I'm happy doing me, enjoying it and feeling like I'm doing it the best. If I find true love on that journey, I will happily embrace it. If I don't, I will happily embrace being single. I still find all the joy in doing things I love and experiencing life either way. But being madly inlove and sharing life with someone would be very nice, and something I would very much like.

Good luck in your search, you'll find someone. lots of amazing people in Chicago, I grew up there and spent my 20's there. Bet in time, you will find your person and even if you don't, you always have you and you should always be who you love most at the end of the day!

this thread is amaze

Now that would be something worth payin' for, eh?!

has anyone mentioned that it's 2025.... the OP seems to have lost track of a smidge of time.


I kid, i kid.... "new" is totally a relative term when applied properly.

Quite well played!


i really did lol and almost had coffee come out my nose. thanks for the laugh to begin my Sunday

I mean this question seriously, I'm not trying to snark of be facetious at all. I honestly would like to hear what long time users here have to say....

So, I get that the message boards are somewhat active and there are actual people interacting and discussing (or mostly viewing silently) but I'm more wondering about the match/message platform... are any of those profiles actual people, or is it over run by various qualities of AI? Yes, I am aware there are also profiles that are victims of trafficking running one of the scams to get money for their traffickers. At least from the perspective of a man iso a woman... on the message boards it seems most of the profiles that get deactivated for scam are "women" so I feel theres a higher rate of guys profiles that are actually legit. So I am wondering is my take on this accurate? The match/message part of this app is just over run by AI and scam for cash operations? Or is my experience due to using the free version and therefore by design I get that side and if I pay for the app I will actually experience matches with actual humans that aren't being held captive and trying to get an Apple card for "gasoline"?

I ask because I'd likely pay for an app if that was the key to not having a frustrating experience, it's very reasonably priced. I just don't wanna spend money if it only gets me more of the same. And no offense to anyone who enjoys message board communities, I get it and for many that is what they have for options in a social life, it's just not for me i'm way too busy bodied, I'm more of an IRL person and just here to make connections, chat a bit to see if both parties would like to go on. date or meet up in said manner. Message boards aren't worth money. Any insight is appreciated and would be helpful in my decision. Thanks!!!

I feel as if this app is the long shot. even in a major city, maybe more so in a major city, 100% of "matches" I have made and messaged with (a few dozen in a few months) have either been no more than an exchange of hellos or, more often, seen the convo quickly get steered by the other person into an ask for money in the form of gift card. Supposedly either for gas to get to a planned date or the more savvy slightly longer grift, for a sick child or loved one. Over the last couple weeks I've literally tested this, and it's the same pattern, same steps, I feel at this point I know how and when it's gonna happen. And all you can do is flag if it happens in the app, the savvy ones will be ok with exchanging contact and message elsewhere. I feel the mods here are all AI bots, based on having photos of mine flagged for things that didn't apply and they never reply when asked anything. Overall, the platform is likely unsupported other that on the basic lifeline of minimal IT for the servers. disclaimer: i use the free version, no way would I pay for this but IDK it could be better if you do