The local drama society was putting on a play for Christmas, in the church hall.

The vicar was hovering in the background watching events taking place.

The director, looking perturbed, spotted the vicar loitering and had a brainwave.

"Hello Vicar, I am in a bit of a quandary. I need a bit part actor, for one minute, but no one wants to spend all day for such a small part. Would you be interested in trying for it?"

You could see the vicar's chest swelling with pride.

"I would love to have a go at it", he said.

"Well", said the director, "You just need to walk onto the stage and pretend that you have been shot. Do you think you could do that?"

"I'll give it a real go." he said.

"Good", said the director, "When the killer fires the gun, all you have to do is grasp your chest and say something like, holy $hit, I've been shot and fall to the ground."

The vicar immediately said, "Oh but I am a man of the cloth, I can't use foul language in God's house."

"OK", said the director, "Just make up something that sounds convincing."

_________________________________________________

Later that day everyone turned up for dress rehersal. The fake blood capsule embedded in the shirt, that the vicar was to wear.

When the moment arrived for the vicar to play his part, he stood in the wings waiting for his cue.

AND ACTION

The vicar strolled onto the stage and a gunshot rang out.

The vicar grasped his chest, puncturing the blood capsule and said, "My goodness gracious, I have been shot."

Then looking down to where the blood was soaking his chest, he exclaimed, "HOLY $HIT, SO I HAVE."

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