Community > Posts By > solestria

 
solestria's photo
Sat 04/05/08 05:34 PM
I don't date men who play head games, period. If someone's not mature and communicative enough to be honest with me about how he feels and what he's thinking, he's not worth my time.

solestria's photo
Sat 04/05/08 05:32 PM

I meet a wonderful lady last weekend from this site, and she is like everything I ever wanted in a girl. I just want to propose to her so effing bad and spend my life with her. And we are talking about one of us moving in with each other already. Are we just crazy or has love struck us hard? Or should we take time and go slow and see what happens?


I'd take it slowly. That's not love, that's infatuation. You can't know her very well after such a short period of time, and she could be totally insane for all you know. Slow down a bit.

solestria's photo
Sat 04/05/08 05:44 AM
Edited by solestria on Sat 04/05/08 05:45 AM

"My kids come first"
Yea right that is what you tell the judge but is your childsupport paid and am I suppose to be a "step-girlfriend" or a co-parent. Parity or forget it.


Wow, really? I would refuse to date anyone who DIDN'T put his kid(s) first. If that most important priority is out of whack, how can you expect him to have anything else together?

(I'm with you on the child support and co-parent bits, though. Co-parenting should only become an issue MUCH later into the relationship.)

solestria's photo
Sat 04/05/08 05:34 AM

dude assertiveness is a turn on to women
[dont believe me ask around] assertiveness not
forcefulness or anything neg like that
just me but i think deep down women[ gonna generalize here]
want a take charge man[even if she is strong enough for both of them]

but its all subjective


Er, I don't. You really can't generalize that way; we're all different people with different needs.

solestria's photo
Sat 04/05/08 05:32 AM
I don't know, I like making the first move sometimes. I tend toward a highly communicative relationship model, so if I want something, I'll usually flat-out ask for it. Takes the guess work out of the whole thing.

solestria's photo
Sat 04/05/08 05:27 AM

I think when it comes to intimate relationships, "I love you" has two translations; "I love having sex with you," and "I actually love you." The difficulty is knowing which applies, or when it changes. huh


One would hope one's partner would be able to vocalize which one (or both) applies.

solestria's photo
Fri 04/04/08 09:09 PM
I think the real problem with Hallmark/Disney notions of love is the "love will conquer all" message. Love doesn't conquer all. We still have different goals, and lives to live, and sometimes those things don't intersect the way we might hope. But that doesn't make love any less real; in fact, that's a more real version of love.

solestria's photo
Fri 04/04/08 09:03 PM
The last time I heard it for the first time, I was quite happy about it. I wasn't sure I was in love with him as well, but I knew that I loved him, and knew that I wasn't going anywhere so there was no rush to figure out how to categorize the love I felt for him.

And since we've broken up, we still love each other. It's different now, and that love has morphed into a different form, but it's definitely no less there. It's really beautiful, actually. I don't think I'll ever stop loving him, and I'm really okay with that.

solestria's photo
Fri 04/04/08 08:59 PM
Most of those things deserve some attribution to the comic who came up with them.

solestria's photo
Fri 04/04/08 01:00 PM

sometimes it can be...depends. there should be a forum for your specific state as well. have you tried emailing others?


I don't think so, but I also hadn't found anyone who looked like they were worth my e-mailing, with compatible interests and such. On another dating site, I can search for people with high match percentages, which makes things easier, and which is why I was confused when I clicked on the matching feature here and didn't see anyone who seemed like they'd be particularly compatible with me. Maybe I'll give the forums a try. Thanks for your help.

solestria's photo
Fri 04/04/08 12:55 PM

maybe you need to try to get into the forums more and meet people and let others meet you..flowerforyou


That may be. Is a lot of this centered around the forums? I wasn't quite sure how I was supposed to find anyone I actually have anything in common with.

solestria's photo
Fri 04/04/08 12:36 PM


unless you are an AD for that other site...why are you here then? it would be great to have you join the forums and get to know others, but i'm not sure i understand your point


I guess I was hoping I was missing some feature. If I'm not, that's cool.

solestria's photo
Fri 04/04/08 12:20 PM

Not sure how you expect to find them. You have two posts! You have to try a little harder than that, I think.

You can't join, and then sit back and wait for the propsals to roll in.


See, this is why I prefer OKCupid. I've seen no hoards of geeks or polyamorous folks on this site. The discussions don't interest me, and the people who have messaged me are generally clueless and seem completely uninterested in what I've said in my profile. I've had success with OKCupid due to its matching system, and due to this site's lack thereof, why should I spend any time here?

solestria's photo
Fri 04/04/08 12:15 PM
Maybe she hasn't found anyone on here she considers worth talking to from a standpoint of compatibility. I've been running into that as well. Just a thought.

solestria's photo
Thu 04/03/08 06:14 PM
I'm in Silver Spring.

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