Ball

Bell

Fill

Coffee. Packing up. Shopping for curtains/blinds.

Mull

As long as it don't bother them, it does not bother me.

Gear

Yes.

Have you ever gone camping outdoors in the woods with your romantic partner?

Like Wal-Nart - ALWAYS!

Be yourself. You can play a role online all you want, but that is something that is emotionally draining to maintain, especially if you do meet someone.

Communicate clearly - don't say you are looking for a relationship when all you want to do is sleep with her/him and move on to the next person.

Open yourself up to the possibility of a great non sexual relationship with someone - takes off the chains of limitations of what we want in a partner and opens your greater world view.

Travel - Take a trip to see something new and if in the process you have dinner or meet someone from the site then that is a bonus.

Treat her like a lady - yes there are some that women that don't like this approach but the old ways still work the best. Treat her like a princess even if she will never be your queen.

pail

Not with a man that has been raised to be a gentleman with every lady, not just his lady, you don't. They wouldn't think of it and you would about have to surprise them in order to pay for something first.

Not a daggone thing wrong with you teebee. Funny, sarcastic, smart, beautiful, speak your mind - sounds like they are either scared of you or trying to use the I'm looking for love card to try to play you. Men know that is one way to get after what they want and some have no problems playing it. And we both know that won't work.

You have your friends in the forums and we luvs ya!

Yep. You gotta figure out what the real deal is before you get hurt, or you end up hurting them.

I would travel within the United States to meet for the first time. I have no problem meeting her halfway if she preferred or flying her in to see me and putting her up at a hotel. Whichever works best for us and her comfort level is key. But I am the type that I would travel that far to see a friend for dinner and a movie. So if it was a definite type of connection then that sure would not be a problem with me. We would just find a way to figure it all out.

reap

It definitely can go both ways. You have zero disagreement from me there. And when it is done by either one in my opinion it is just plain wrong.



Does paying the rent, mortgage, car payment, or buying the kids clothes because the babies father won't count too?

teebee thankfully I can honestly say no to the gold diggers question on this site. This has been the most low key site I have been on. But I have been on some sites since 2000 and dealt with people that it is cray cray for real. I can just tell you as a man - even if it means me losing my man card - I have been in the exact same situation you and navygirl alluded to - thinking I was the one she really wanted to be with when she was playing the game. When she didn't want me but the house, be the baby daddy, etc. If it was just one woman in my life, it would be one thing and I wouldn't even mention it. I have seen and experienced it many times.

Is every woman a gold digger? No. Just like every man is not a dog and is not playing games. A lot of what I believe we call games are really the result of inadequate communication of desires on both the woman's and the man's part.

Am I the only one who heard the words Security!!! when teebee posted this... Love it!

As to the OP question I think a lot of it is because both men and women are afraid to be up front, honest, real talk about what they are looking for. Whatever it is. Because if most were 100 percent honest they would scare off someone they think may be a good match. The majority of women knows if she says straight up she is looking for an ATM hookup or a substitute baby daddy and not a relationship of some type, she probably won't get that guy to open his wallet. A guy knows if he says he just want to get it, hit it and quit it, without any other desired commitment that the woman is looking for he isn't going to get it from that particular woman. Yet to be sadly honest that is what a whole bunch of men and women are looking for. Having an established relationship of some defined type is only a means to achieve their primary objective.

So they keep those cards very close to the vest to a later date, hoping to hook them by other means. Only to discover the other person was doing the same exact thing to them. So what they thought was real and promising ends up being a tragic game. And every game there is a winner and loser.

Then you have those who are always looking for one or two better than the one they have, only to let the one they have slip away from them. Like playing checkers they keep their hand on the one piece not committing to the move while exploring other options. But when one get hurt it was a game because you told him or her you loved them but not like the partner truly wanted to be loved - they moved on and now you mad they moved on. Again both men and women play this game.

I hate what you went thru and I truly hope that one day someone will see what you truly have to offer and embrace that and you completely as you want to be.

Brutal honesty is better than sleight of hand maneuvering. I would rather know what a woman is looking for up front than to have to guess, or be put into an uncomfortable position. No expectations and go with the flow is how I prefer to roll. I read the profile and see if we are looking for similar before I even send the request. Just makes sense to me.

That being said, it also works in reverse. I have on my profile, as well as most other social/dating sites I have been on that, I am looking for friends. Doesn't mean I won't go on a date or date exclusively. Doesn't mean I won't have an intimate encounter. Doesn't mean I won't get remarried. For friendship is start of all that. I respect a woman who says she is only looking for a husband. Nothing wrong with that. But if her timeline is 2 months, I am definitely not the guy for her - she may as well keep on looking and not waste time on me. And I tell her upfront.

Welcome to Mingle! Hope that you enjoy yourself here and that you find what you are looking for.