It's very hard to deal with as a mother. I have a 25 year old son in jail for first degree murder. He's been in for 20 months now and it's not any easier on me today than it was in the beginning. One of the only things that gets me through it is knowing that I did everything in my power to show him by example how to live a good clean life, I taught him right from wrong, taught him to do the right thing in life. It was HIS choice not to live his life the way I taught him to. Remember that, it was HIS choice.
My heart goes out to any mother in the same situation.
Hugs!