Hi there i am so glad to have found you page. It will be nice to tell someone i dont know how i feel at the moment because i feel i;m going crazy. I am 37, married with 4 kids and a foster daughter. My mother had me late in life at 42...she was the greatest mum in the world, aren't they all:) my dad sadlt died when he was 48, i was 5 from cancer. My mum died 3 years ago , smoking realated (not cancer). I have 2 much older sisters and an older brother. My sister was told 2 weeks before christmas she has ovarian cancer! It was such a shock (the silent killer) is sooo true. So within 2 weeks she had had a full hysorectomy and is awaiting to have chemo. Her chnaces of survival went from %30 to now %70 and thats before the chemo. It has hit me really hard. I am so close to my sister even though we live miles apart, when my mum died she kinda replaced her as that mother figure. I feel so angry that she has it, i feel sad because she is so wonderful and has 5 wonderful kids that dont deserve to see their mum in pain. I also feel selfish because i dont think i coulod cope without her, so if anything happens to her(i pray it doesnt) i will just shrivle up and not want to go on. I dont have contact much with my other siblings and i have NO other family. We have a very bristish sense of humour in our family and me and her laugh about things , like the fact she may need a wig and maybe we could both go and buy something outrages! Wev are like this on the phone most of the time, but inside me i am aching, i feel a constant sadness. My sister called the other day and was upset, saying the worst thing for her is that ya know that feeling we all have that we are indestructable, that feeling that nothing will happen to us, well she feels like she has lost that feeling forever now and she wants to feel it again, she doesnt want to go on thinking every pain might be cancer. I know how she feels. Oh i am sorry for going on but it is nice to get it off my chest. You tend to not go on about how you feel because it seems selfush. Any way i better go before i go on too much..
I hope things are ok with you all.
Krista
xxxxx