We pay for the sins of our mothers and fathers
A tragedy is being written and we are the authors
So go ahead and suffer the delusion that you've earned what the world offers
or you can humbly receive what you truthfully don't deserve.
My fellow sons and daughters.

It seems, at times, that life just sucks
and the bad out weighs the good.
"To live is to lose" some pessimists say
"life never turns out like it should".
But maybe thats why the good times are fleeting
in a life that feels like we're taking a beating
so we don't take for granted in life what we're depleting
Things like forgiveness, joy, and sacrifice
Make a life, almost lost, worth living.

Everyone has what it takes
Go now and make the world a better place.

I woke up cold this morning
shaking
aching
completely alone
my blanket thrown off my bed from a terrible nightmare
I laid with my eyes open
staring blankly ahead
my arms wrapped around my knees holding them to my chest for warmth
still
motionless
silent

YET ON THE INSIDE WAS A MILLION THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS
LOUDER THAN A HURRICANE RIPPING OFF THE CEILING
MY ISOLATION HAD BECOME MY CONDEMNATION
THE NIGHTMARE WAS REOCCURRING
WITH WORRIES FLURRYING
MEMORIES SCURRYING
SINS WERE FLIRTING
SONGS OF HURTING
PAIN AVERTING
FOR WANT OF RATIONAL THOUGHT MY MIND WAS DIVERTING!
SO EXTREMELY......... disturbing.

I woke up

cold
this very morning
safe in silence
but with a warning

shaking
aching
completely alone.

We are never truly free until we overcome the fears that bind us to this world

no particular reason...just tired of idiot boys i guess

That's how I feel right now...just thought I'd share...

***The Disclaimer*** I may sound like I'm whining...I'm not, just thinking...would love some other opinions though...thanks!

Ok, so we all have heard that saying thousands of times...what about nice girls though? It would seem to me that we finish last too. Almost every guy I talk to says "I'm just looking for a nice, sweet girl to spend time with" (or something of that nature) If that's the case, why have I been single for 3 1/2 years? Could it be that guys want a nice girl as a wife, but wants a "naughty" girl right now? If that's the case, then what I'm sensing is that I'm not worth waiting for...and if I'm not worth waiting for, then why should I even bother looking?

Oh, but I AM worth waiting for...I know that...and the Mr. Right will know that...and don't get me wrong, Mr. Right, you are totally worth waiting for too...I just feel sometimes, like I've waited long enough, something needs to happen soon...maybe this whole dating thing is a big test of my patients...I don't know.

Ok...I totally hear what you're saying...and I agree. My purpose in writing this, was certainly not to say "this is absolute, and what I believe is the only way"...although, in re-reading it, I can see how I might come across that way...my purpose was just to get some ideas out of my head so I don't drive myself crazy thinking too much...I don't know that what i believe is the only way, I've been taught that, but I honestly am not sure...and I am definitely not about to hate on others for believing something different than me. I sincerely apologize if I did come across that way.

you are so speaking my language, totage...rock on

Do you ever wonder why people do mean things to other people? Or why there is so much hatred in the world? Or why so many people have to die just because one guy thinks he's better than everyone else? Do you think that maybe these people have never experienced love before? They spend all their time worshiping false idols, and don't know what it's like to have a deep and meaningful relationship with God or even with the other people around them. What is love anyway? As a child, the only concept that we have of what love really is, is the love our parents have for each other and for us. If our parents are fighting all the time, or if they beat us or even ignore us, how can we learn what love is? We can't, at least not the love that humans are supposed to have for each other. God has to show us, we have to be willing to learn what it means to love. He has to show us His love, the same love that sent His Son to die for us. The same love that is full of grace and forgiveness. The very love that lets us feel pain and despair just so that we'll know when we really are alright. And with that realization comes the ability to love someone else, and show then love the way God intended us to. If we all could do just that, there might not be so much hatred in the world.

thanks! It's really hard for me to put my stuff out there for people to read...but it really kind of gives you an idea of where I'm at right now...I dont know...

I told you not to break my heart

You broke it anyway.

I told you not to let me go

Now you say that you can't stay.



It's not okay!



You are so much like my dad,

You piss me off then make me laugh

Then you'll go on

Pretending everything's okay.



It's not okay!



It's not okay to say those things

And then take them all away

It's not okay; you know how I felt

And you did it anyway.



It's not okay!



So now, you want to be friends,

Do you even know what that means?

A friend is someone to trust

Not who will use you when he needs.



It's SO not okay!