1.) What doesn't belong in this list: Meat, Eggs, Wife, Blowjob?

2.) Why does a penis have a hole in the end?

3.) What's the speed limit of sex?

4.) What do a Rubix cube and a penis have in common?

5.) What's the difference between his paycheck and his penis?

6.) Three words to ruin a man's ego...

7.) What do you get when you cross Raggedy Ann and the Pillsbury Dough
Boy?

8.) How can you tell when an auto mechanic just had sex?

9.) What do you do with 365 used rubbers?

10.) What does bungee jumping and hookers have in common?

Glad you noticed I got another tie ... it's a loaner from Charles. His
beautiful new step-mother has been cleaning out the closets to make room
for her stuff.

Hi Marie ... I think all the rowdy's are sleeping! Just us now ... the
peaceful ones!

ok, me too ... I found out the cops name is Charles. He had to go back
to work, his step-mom insisted.

ohhh crap ... I just realized we're intermingling jokes now!

All this confusion because I didn't get my royalty check ... and had to
pawn my neckties ... didn't you notice my hairy chest? The screaming?
The cops flashlight (at least, I hope that was his flashlight)?

Mike ... I mean, LazyJ ...

You should have kept that $20 bucks in your wallet! See what you
started?

Ohhh, I thought you was an alien from outerspace ...

Are you working on the new arizona/mexican border? If so, yes ... we'll
need your papers and green card! My bad.

Wrong kind of aliens ... you don't need papers and green cards ... your
not an illegal alien!

or,

are you?

The drama unfolds!

Move them to Area 51 ... you'll be safe there! Ask any alien!

Thats a good one ...

The sad thing is ... it takes even longer to get hard in COLD water!
Unless its been a really really long time since you was laid.

Sorry, guess that was a bad yoke!

LOL

I've heard of WANNAHUCKALUGGIE ... Isn't that southeast of Tucson???
LOL

L2P ... you're a nut ... but, it's all good! Have fun!

Thought you was gonna say ...


Whoosh ... she turned 30 and left him standing there holding his bags!

Thanks ... that's why we're here! Keep smilin'

The ONE that got away!

Your future ex!

Earth ... most of us!

Don't have to be married to make that mistake! LOL

Too good to be true!

It is hard to find a joke today without a dirty word or two in it, but
here's one:


Two tall trees, a birch and a beech, are growing in the woods. A small
tree begins to grow between them.

The beech says to the birch, "Is that a son of a beech or a son of a
birch?"

The birch says he cannot tell.

Just then a woodpecker lands on the sapling.

The birch says, "Woodpecker, you are a tree expert. Can you tell if that
is a son of a beech or a son of a birch?"

The woodpecker takes a taste of the small tree. He replies, "It is
neither a son of a beech nor a son of a birch. It is, however, the best
piece of ash I have ever put my pecker in."



Wipe that smile off your face.