Sent to me by a friend today.

Get your Kleenex out first.

http://www.richhumor.com/wp-filez/PerhapstheBestFordCommercia.wmv

Make that Ford commercial.

I've always heard to keep mmmm mmmmmmm mm mmm mm mmm mmmm mm mmm mmmm pathewy.
Keep them in your mouth to keep them warm before putting them on a hook.

Gotta love Bill Engvall.

On a bottle of shampoo, "Lather, rinse and repeat."

You know some guy is still in the shower.

There actually is a contest to award the dumbest warning label.

One year it went to John Deere on a tractor. All the sticker said was, "May cause death."

About 8 years ago, when I worked for a sign company, a WeinerMobile pulled into the driveway by accident and drove to the back of the lot. SHE! turned it around in very tight quarters and asked us if this was the ... rental agency that was next door.

The agency had moved to a new location.

At the time I so wished I had a camera.

That's a big weiner!

I would be all for public healthcare if they would actually fix the problem. Our healthcare system is out of control and needs to be fixed.

Drug and insurance companies run our healthcare system now and need to be stopped, but Obama and the rest of our government haven't got the nads to stop it because they would lose half their income.

Why does it take a specialist, to be paid separately, for every procedure done now when a general practitionist used to do it themselves?

Greed.

And that is what is bringing our country down.

It'll take a hole the size of Opra..... I mean the Grand Canyon to bury all the weiner mobiles out there.

Signed,
People Eating Tasty Animals

Since you think Obama is failing, what do you think McCain would have done? Any better? I don't think so.

I didn't like either one of them, but I still think Obama was the lesser of two evils.

I know how everyone feels. My deepest condolences.

I took in a feral, true alleycat, about 8 years ago. When I had it spayed they told me he had feline HIV and that he would only live for at most 4 years. He's had some problems the last few years, but usually a couple of doses of amoxicillin and he was back to normal. The last few days he wasn't eating much and yesterday he quit eating and drinking entirely. He wanted outside so I let him go out. He wouldn't come back in last night and I found he had passed during the night. I buried him today. Isn't it strange that animals know when it's over.

Just typing this will help me get through it. Another quirk of nature.

Yes, but you will need some 2x4's, nails and a hammer to get started.

I'll never buy another calculator without the back ---> arrow. Once you have had one you can never go back to a calculator without one.

Add Jerry Garcia, also.

Recycling in my neighborhood means going around the block.

Twice.

On your bike!

If your deck is dirty and has stains from years of neglect, you need to call The Deck Suckers.

They come equipped with high-powered vacuum cleaners powered by outboard motors. They tried Evanrude and others, but found that Johnson made the best motor. They call their vacuums The Johnson Suckers.

Whether you have a small deck or a huge deck like mine, with Deck Suckers, just sit back and let them suck your deck.

Going to the Rolex Series races at Mid-Ohio Sportscar Course.

You must be gay then.

I thought the song was

"All my ex's are infected"

Gotta love Bob and Tom

I'll bet the company keeps the statue.

This guy is actually pretty good and charges should be dropped.

I had two stations off-the-air until a few days ago. Then poof, they were gone. I bought two converter boxes about six months ago and even with the coupons it cost me over $50. Wally World was constantly out of them and Radio Shanty ripped me off.

Anyways, I hooked up one of the boxes and Far Out Man, I thought I had cable again 4 weather channels, 5 religious channels and a big bunch of other channels. Then it started to happen. No matter how I adjusted the antennae the sound would drop out totally and then resume. Worse than a fuzzy picture. Iput the box away in the closet.

Two things are happening. I live far out in the country and I live in a polebarn house. A metal building that airwaves won't penetrate easily. In order to receive better signals I would have to put up a tall antennae outside at the cost of $300-400.

There are only about 3 shows on tv that are worth watching, so goodby tv.

I only drink water that's boiled or fermented.

Fairly weak coffee during the day and a few beers at night.

I pee a lot, so it must be enough.

I would think homeowner's tax go down when the property values goes down.

This might help.

A man walks up and sits down at the bar. "What can I get you?" the bartender inquires. "I want 6 shots of Jagermeister," responded the young man. "6 shots“! Are you celebrating something?" "Yeah, my first blowjob." "Well, in that case, let me give you the 7th on the house." "No offense, sir. But if 6 shots won't get rid of the taste, nothing will."