Like Jmell, I've got a pic of my tattoo up here which requires my shirt being off. We've never really got an answer from the ladies... is this ok since you're just showing off your tats? Especially if the kind of girl you want likes tats?

Thanks, Rufus.

I'd like to comment that physical attraction is probably the biggest difference between a friend and a significant other. I wouldn't date Barbie and have met plenty of excellent female specimens that I wouldn't date with another guys wallet. But I also know what kind of woman is going to get my blood boiling... so yes, the pictures are important because what usually attracts you to a person initially is their looks; that's just instinct, plain and simple. However, it takes compatibility to maintain the kind of attraction that endures the storms of life together.

So when you see "Must have nice boobs or be willing to get a boob job" in my profile... Hey! I'm just being honest! Every woman's profile I've ever read says she wants an honest guy...

I love it, Ms. Tulsa!

The best I can figure is that it's a way for both people to gauge their real interest. If you remember to call her three days later, then she'll feel she's memorable and you'll know it wasn't just a rush of testosterone... but at the same time, I don't get a number everyday, so when I do get one, I can't stop thinking about it for those three days. I'm thinking screw the number, let's go out when you get off work!

Yeah, those 3 day rules and such are pretty vague and undocumented... maybe the subject for a new thread.

I have to wait for her to call 'cause I already called her three times; the initial call, a follow-up to make sure she got the first one, and the third...

We were all hanging out again and she was there, very busy. I respected that she was busy, shot her a couple of smiles to let her know I was there and she smiled back. She never broke free, so I left my number with the hostess as we were leaving. Before I even got home, she called me from work to say that she was still interested. I called the third time and left a message and haven't heard anything since.

My opinion is that if we have communication problems before we even go on our first date, it is SO not meant to be. I just wanted to know if it's actually ok to ask your waitress out, and now I see that it is. That one's obviously a lost cause, but you never know when those tight jeans and cute accent will come bustling out the kitchen and up to my table.

Ask and ye shall receive, Joyce.

I don't know why I'm still single. Check out my profile and let me know.

All great posts... except the stalker one. Yikes. Unless she's into that kinda stuff... she's all yours, dude.

I already asked her out, and she gave me her number but hasn't called back. Me and my friends go there all the time and when I saw her again, I asked her if she really wanted to go out and she said she did but still hasn't called. I just wanted to make sure I didn't commit some faux pas by asking her out at work and she was just trying to be polite or keep me coming to the bar.

Thanks everybody! I've got some dining out to do this week; there are quite a few cute nice waitresses in the area that'll be getting napkins from me. Maybe one of 'em might even call back.

So your waitress is hot. She's wearing tight jeans that make her butt look awesome! She's sweet, has a nice smile, keeps your water glass full, asks you what you guys are doing later... you want to ask her out. Bad! :-)

I think it's tacky to ask out your waitress/bartender. It's almost like you're cornering them because they're at work and can't leave if they're uncomfortable. Not to mention that you don't know how much of their behavior is just them working. It's hard though, 'cause some or them look real good and have cute accents...

So what does everybody think? Should you ask out the waitress? Leave your number on a napkin? I'd definitely like to hear what waitresses/bartenders think.

I definitely agree that some apologies might be in order. Sometimes just apologizing that a bad situation got out of hand, no matter who "started it", gets things back on track.

As far as Mike generalizing women, I didn't really get that impression. Maybe that didn't come to mind because, in forums, I expect general comments to be made because of the large audience. Obviously not all women are overweight sex-crazed swindlers, luring Mike in with BS and breaking his heart. What I got from his original post is that he's had these few horrible experiences with the same type of women and he was wondering if it was something to do with him or if that's just what the online dating scene was about. I can sense his frustration, which definitely could put reader's on the defensive. I still think he acted appropriately because Barbie could have put things more empathetically. We're all in the same boat and should support each other, providing advice as requested and, as in this case, as needed. Maybe Mike needed some correcting, and we definitely owe it to him to do so because that's the unspoken responsibility we accept when participating in communities such as this.

I guess I could weigh in. Pretty odd that Mike and I are 20 years apart in age and in the same boat with women. I'm also one of those "nice" guys; opening car doors, cooking, cleaning, attentive. I've had some pretty interesting relationships since my divorce, and most of them resulting in a desire to be a monk as well... but monks don't ride motorcycles, so I ruled that one out a long time ago. :-) Point is, there's no real reason to give up. We're single because we haven't met the "One" yet. Looking or not, we stay that way until we meet someone. Whether you're active on a dating site, clubbin' it up, or going to the grocery store every day, we just need to be open to the idea that Ms./Mr. Right could be on the next aisle over. But boy can it get frustrating... just be yourself and it will come. Open communication is the best way to sift through the necessary evil of failed dates so as not to waste time (yours or hers) on something that's not going to work out. Make sure she knows that the kids come first. If that's not cool with her, she's not for you anyway. I appreciate those kind of details in the profiles of girls I'm checkin' out, so I'm sure they appreciate it, too.

Ok, I'm done rambling. This hangover from last night's unsuccessful foray into the bar dating world makes from some lengthy and only semi-coherent babble. And one last thing; even if you did call Barbie a *****, any "nice" guy is a guy that will be honest and will do what's right for the community, and setting people straight is part of that. She blasted you unnecessarily from the get-go and you responded appropriately, in my opinion.

Keep truckin', buddy. There's someone out there that'll put up with our $h!t. :-)