CHEERS!

I don't know how else to put it. If some of you had read my older thread earlier "Go for it or stand down" I finally came to a conclusion that this girl is beyond my league. Come to find out that I'm basically not the type of guy for her and I was completely honest with this cutie. I know that she has everything that I ever wanted in a cutie like her but man, talk about being crushed when she mention what her standards are. Of course after our little coffee meeting, I got home and started to think hard and question myself "Am I really meant to be in a relationship? Is it wrong for me to be picky of whom I want to be with?" Well, at least her and I are going to be friends though, so thats the good part of it. At least I know what or where I have to go if I haven't found anyone within 2 years time. =) But other than that, I just got OWNED! LOL!

I believe that I was never a smooth talker with the ladies. I always end up saying the wrong crap and my brother has to be there to correct me. Its sad, I can't really have a nice normal conversation with a woman.

Myspace is a social networking site not a dating site. And the other one is Facebook. I'm on those sites just to keep in touch with old friends and family.

Always create a restore point depending on the OS you have. If can download spybot search and destroy and that may help too. If the virus or spyware cannot be removed by spybot s&d, then you have to remove it manually.

I'll be sure to fill her in. But if she's not the type then her and I can still be good friends.

Ok, I'll keep that in mind.

Its another year closer to DEATH!

I'm sorry but at work I notice this nice looking lady and my supervisor has hots for her. Knowing that she's hella taller than me and I can imagine her man handling him in bed, I just call her Amazon lady.

I met this one girl on myspace. I was looking for someone around my age group, just about a year younger or older than me. I had ask her just to go out for some coffee just to get to know each other and all. Good thing was, she attends a military academy, so therefore what goes through my mind is "I always wanted someone who can relate to me and I can relate to her", and another thing she's cute. I continue to fight constantly with the reminders of what my friends and family embedded into my head, and yes, she's white so its a constant battle, mentally. The girl is physically fit and of course you had to be if you're part of the academy, right? After reading some of the mingle members have posted in response or emails, I'm going to take your advice into effect and hopefully it turns out well. And I'm taking it really slow and easy...still scared of the past relationships. LOL!

What's going on. We only have Amazon ladies on here?

Sadly enough, no. That was our biggest mistake. My family and friends know what kind of woman I want. When they met her a few times and had gotten to know her, they knew that it would be a doomed marriage. They wouldn't stop me because all they care about is to see me end up being happy.

Igor: What you say is like a ***** slap in the face. But I have to take your criticism in and accept it. I guess reality says that I cannot be pure viet then. I will have to think twice next time. Thanks for the criticism.

MsHarmony: I'll take your advice and learn from my mistakes. I just didn't one to be the smart man who makes mistakes, I wanted to be the wise man who learn mistakes of others. That was what I wanted to point out to my ex wife and she didn't think it was fair.

The thing is, I get bombarded with questions from the higher ups. Its really annoying because there are things that she's doing is not to their liking or things that will lead to disaster. I mean I'm looking for someone who has the same work ethnic as I do as well man but I end up marrying someone who just doesn't get it! LMAO!

Thanks man.

But what do I suppose to do with a woman who just doesn't understand what I'm trying to do is for the better? She just thinks that I'm going to end up like my father who constantly works and doesn't spend time with his family on his days off. I told her constantly that I'm not like that but for now, we're in hard times and I have to do everything possible to keep them alive.

I guess I should be a little more picky now huh? I wanted to throw the skin color out of the way but just having what my friends and family sayings embedded into my head, its becoming very hard.

Damn it! You're lucky to go. I have to wait a couple of years until I can go with my teacher.

Thanks. But its not like being submissive or anything like that. It became my sole responsibility for my family's survival. I mean we do have a child involved too and I have to think more about the well being for my child, even if it means for me to be away from home just to work so they can live comfortably. But that didn't happen because she end up crying about what I have to do for the better. Thinking that I will end up being like my father, I mean come on, the man had to escape from a war torn country and started out with nothing! He also escape from a POW camp in Vietnam and did all possible means to get here.

I don't know if this is true with anyone but there has been some problems with inner racial marriages. I didn't care about what race or ethnic groups I end up dating or marrying but I was given a warning from my family and friends that my marriage with a white woman will not work. I didn't believe them and went ahead with it. 3 years later...they were right. There was a lot of cultural confrontations or issues that arise within the household. I was more of the traditional type of Asian guy and she was more of the "I rather be free and screw your Asian traditions". I am traditional but not too traditional, I mean I do open my mind to other cultures and try to understand their way of life. She ends up telling me that I know nothing of the American culture but I do because I'm living in it or growing up with it. But behind closed doors within the Asian family household, its a whole different world and that is the kind of life I grew up with also. My father always tell me "Do not forget where you came from or forget any of our traditions. I refuse you to end up like other Viet Americans who have forgotten their place and formalities or the family they represent. You are Viet, don't forget that!" Its a constant drill when I was growing up and they do teach me proper manners and everything else of how a Viet suppose to be.
My ex wife says that I'm controlling, abusive, selfish, and stubborn. There are things that she does that will lead to that event. I had explained to her what she can do to prevent from me to react that way so quickly, one word that falls on it all "Obedience" and I don't mean to work like a slave or a dog. But just to listen to me when I have good intentions, not bad ones. I do allow her to have her own mind and free will but when I know the action she does are bad and shes unaware of it, I end up letting her know and just wanting her to listen and obey.
Of course being in the Army we have commanders who end up giving us safety briefings and telling us not to be the idiot who screws up. "Don't be that GUY!" its a constant reminder. And another note "A smart man makes mistakes but a wise man learn mistakes from others". I had constantly told myself even to my ex wife that I highly refuse to end up like a typical American who ends up in poverty and debt. I took all measures, even extreme ones to prevent such event to happen, but my ex wife decides to go ahead and fight against my ideals when I know that the intentions are for the better. She continues to fight against it and now I'm in the hole and ended up like any other Americans who are in serious debt. My parents had learned of this in a short period of time and asked me a crap load of questions that I don't even want to answer but I have to. They were completely disappointed of the dumb decisions I've made when they had taught me better when I was growing up. I told my ex wife that I end up getting a lot of questions from my parents because of her decisions and actions. And I get very annoyed by it, but she asked me "Why do you have to answer to them?" Because when she marries me, she's married into the family hierarchy and we have very strict rules to follow because we're Viet, not typical Americans. She thinks that I'm spoiled which is not basically true because my parents were trying to teach me the value of hard work to earn your own things. My parents didn't buy me a car after another, I have to work for it. My ex wife on the other hand, her parents buy her a car and so on so forth, one after another. I never gotten any hand me downs either.
Wanna know whats more crazy? I end up buying her 3 different cars within a short period of time and I meant "BRAND NEW ONES" off the lot! I bought her a new dining table, couch, dresser, took her on a nice vacation, basically paid for everything even though I started to hit my limit. In return all I ask of her is to do her part in helping. Think about this, I end up getting a severance pay from the Army because of my medical discharge, all gone within a 4 months time period when the damn thing suppose to last for 6 or more. My friends and family were completely shocked. I told my ex wife that we cannot take a vacation until there is a stable income to live off of. These are hard times right now and its completely suicidal to even take one. But she cried, griped and complained about it so to make her shut up, we end up taking one. And of course you know where that lead to.
The fact is, I had always listen to myself when I know something is bad in a relationship but this past one, I didn't. I end up listening to my ex wife who lead me into some serious problems. I should've known better and I should've listen to my family and friends who tells me that I'm happier and better off with an Asian chick. Now there is a total exception to that though...
If I was going to be with someone out of my ethnic group, she has to be well aware and educated on our culture, otherwise there will be yet, another war zone. Don't get me wrong, there are beautiful white women who I'm tempted to go for but I'm too picky because I want a cute one and I don't know where they've all gone to. LOL! I hope this novel gave you a snore eye.