lmao

oh em effin gosh! that is some funny ish right there!
---miami fl

A man isnt feeling good one day so his wife takes him to the doctor. The doctor runs some test, then asks the husband to step out so he can talk to the wife.

Wife- is everthing ok?
Doc- to be quiet honest your husband has a rare disease that is triggered by stress
Wife- is he gonna die?
Doc- There is a possibility, but it can be avoided. Dont have him do any heavy lifting and allow him to relax at home, with no strenuous activities.
The wife walks out the room, her husband looks at her and says "hon, what did he say?"

Wife "he said your gonna die"

thanks

A guy walks in a bar, looks at the bartender and says "got any gwapes?"
The bartender shakes his head and says "no. we dont have any grapes." The stranger leaves.

The next day the same guy walks into the bar, looks at the bartender and says "got any gwapes?"
The bartender says "I told you yesterday, we dont have any grapes." The stranger leaves.

The next day the same guy walks into the bar, looks at the bartender and says "got any gwapes?"
The bartender yells "We dont have any damn grapes and if you come in here and ask me again, im gonna staple your tongue to the bar!" The guy leaves.

The next day the same guy walks into the bar, looks at the bartender and says "got any staples?" the bartender says "no." The guy says "ok good, got any gwapes?"

One day Jane found Tarzan sticking his dick in a tree.

Jane said, "Tarzan is that how you have sex?!"
Tarzan replied,"What sex?"

Jane went on to explain to him what sex was. She then proceeded to lay on the ground and spread her leg, and pointed towards her vagina and said "put that in here"

Tarzan responed by kicking her hard in the vagina.
Jane screamed out and said "WHY"D YOU DO THAT FOR?!"
He looked at her and said "Tarzan check for squirrels"

all my poems are published. check them out on poetry.com and search my name: charveline =)