happens to be mi fav band :)

thank you :) its hard to be addicted to anything much less a drug. ive been addicted to many things my self, one of which was meth. so i know its a strugle, but its easier with some one beside you

beauty cant cover my pain
band-aids cant fade my scars
forever was way to short
and smiles cant mend my heart

time doesn't heal all wounds
some are too deep to reach
paper cuts on my fingers
from all the notes i reread

mascara may be waterproof
but it cant fight all my tears
i let them run down my face
being pretty doesn't matter here

here is my statuary
and for once i cant fight
the hurt that seeps in my blood
or the pain of the falling night

here is where i once dreamed
of seeing my favorite face
and the only one that makes me sick
is the one i cant replace

here is my safe haven
closest to my veins
wrapped around my pulse
and riped out from today

breaking the history of the perfect couple
on this very night
here my heart is soiled
by the coming of the light

here is where you once loved
but you gave it back to me
i tried so hard to make it right
i need you to see
that you were my only
and you slowly gave me back
five months to the day
is a life ill always lack

ill never forget you
because here is where you are
you were my safe haven
that existed in my only heart
you are that statuary
that I've strived so hard to find
and it sucks so bad
because I'm lost in here
and live only in my mind

Kitty Vandergrift

*NOTE TO READER* they may not mean much to you but some of theses poems such as this one happen to be a memory, please respect that, they are copyrighted.

give me something to believe in,
when i cant see your face.
tell me your waiting
you love me and have faith
I'm fighting so hard,
with such an addiction,
your my pillar of strength
when this drug digs its teeth in

tell me you'll be there,
after what we've been through,
all that we've lost
brushed off old
that's now new


sometimes i buckle
and lose my nerve
to a temptation so strong
that causes a splurge.
and there you wait
on the other side
knowing I'm sorry
as you hold me tight.


alone we sit,
as i sleep of the day,
you are all that's left.
when the high melts away.
i open my eyes,
am over come with such force
when i catch a glimpse
of a heart breaking site
I've seen to much before,
the look of one feening
searching for just a little more.
but its in your eyes I'm finding some one who's sick
of some one hurting and waiting there next fix.


i only see it,
when raw nerves are strained
you take such a beating
your addiction is the saddest
of so many things
your vice is my heart.
no needle
but the most poisonous sting
you'll do anything to have it
your addiction,
is the worst kind of habit.
for ever waiting
on the love of an addict


this poem was not written about me, it was written in in the view of an addicts eyes struggling with an addiction, watching their loved ones fight to help them over come it.

thanks guys, yall are sweet. hesitance actually on mingle2! he goes by (irish21) and i wuve him <3

thanks guys :) its nice to hear that when you put your heart in to something. <3

thank you :) and i have, hes the one for me :p

What is this feeling?
the repercussions from it
why do i feel my heart
in my stomach

What are you doing
living in my mind
why am i so fearless
you wont make me cry
I'm taking a steps
and i always trip
why do i feel better
when its you that i kiss

What is this giggle
its normally a sob
I'm so nerves
but not so numb
i feel the warmth of a better day
when I'm with you
I'm not so afraid
to take those chances
i would have never took
why do i get so jumpy
when you turn to look

I know i need you
as early as this
doubt doesn't haunt me
is this what love is?
can you be the one to show me
the worlds not all bad
are you that person
in all those dreams Ive had?

Are you such a man
that can take all my pain
even give you the title dad
for my son to name
will you be his father
and show how things are done
could you be proud
to call my little boy son?

Already so important
in my life
you strip every tear
from my tired eyes
you make me feel different
pressure off my chest
when i sleep, i dream of you
and so easy i rest
what is this feeling
where theres normally stress
could this really be
what true love is?

written for: Dorian Moon
thank you for having faith in me
when no one else would :)
i love you

:) yea i love makin new friends.