Thanks for all of the weight loss advise. I think in the end it is just going to take awhile to lose the weight. A friend of mine starved himself and lost 60 pounds in about 3 months. He ended up eating a lot of his muscle mass doing so. He then ended up gaining it all back and in the end was in worse shape. I would rather take my time and do it right. I think the main thing I need is just to become active again period. As for if I am shallow well maybe I am. My wife was 5 foot 2 and 115 pounds. She was and always will be my idea woman period and I will compare every woman to her. But I am a realist and I know that a woman that size isn't going to go for me now and I have no problem with a woman a few pound over weight. I truthfully think some woman look better with curves. But if you are 5 foot 2 and 200 pounds then that is disgusting period. I know that in the end I will pay for my choices and I may just end up alone because of it. And I am fine with that. Hey the love of your life only comes once.

No sodas for me. I gave them up a long time ago. I haven't seen my Dad since I was 9. So I don't know how he is built. When my wife died I pretty much locked my self up in my house for the last couple of years. I just didn't care any more I just wanted to raise my daughter and die after wards. Now I am trying to get my life back. That means losing the weight. I have started eating way smaller portions and eating more veggies and I ride the stationary bike. I tried to walk but my back hurts too much and my butt and my legs start to go numb the bike doesn't cause this. I also hit the heavy bag for 10 mintues or so a day. Hey that gets out a lot of frustration!

I am not fluffy!!!!!! Oh man it won't let me do a frowny face! I am kind like a big bear! I have big arms, broad shoulders and now.... a big gut.I have no flab on my arms shoulders or legs. I have tried sit ups and man they hurt like hell now! I figure it will take a few months to get back where I was before. Hey it took my about 3 years to become like this!

My bike is made so that you can exercise your arms too. I thought about doing weights but I haven't lost any of the muscle definition from my arms or chest. I just have a big gut now. I also didn't think I needed to gain muscle mass. I know that the extra weight doesn't help the back any! I am doing 45 to 50 minutes a day on the bike. Man depression can do a number on you if you let it.

I am trying to work it off, but I am limited due to ruptured disk in my back. So I am limited to stationary bike and diet. Which makes it slow going. But hey I am trying! I do it for me not to attract women. I just want to be back to normal.

Now that I have put on a few pounds do I have to like big women? After my wife died I became depressed and gained a lot of weight. I am trying to lose it now. But it is hard to do. I pretty much only get messages from REALLY big women. I am not attracted to them at all. What am I supposed to do? I understand that most thin women are not going to really want to be with me and I am ok with that. But am I in the wrong for being turned off by big women?