I'm Caucasian I guess, but my heritage is French Canadian and so my skin is a bit of a 'darker' hue. I still think that I have Metis in my background. But other than my dad's mom's side, the rest is all European French. I'm not like German or pale Norwegian skin Caucasian but that is my category.

..ohh.k.. so you're looking for a happily ever after then... from what I'm gathering..


Your initial post was
"When you date someone does it always have to be going somewhere.. "

Well, what do you think? Who just dates seriously for '***** and giggles'? Either it is serious or it isn't. If it is serious then it better be going somewhere even if it is just because of 'loneliness' and 'companionship'. If it not going somewhere, it will eventually end.

Where is the fine line between 'player/serial dater' and committed relationship? And if it is committed there really is only one way to go.

From No1PhD
"..hmm.2 ways.. together or apart..hmmm very insightful.. "


Exactly my point. If you think you can have a serious relationship and not take into consideration that eventually it will have to be forever, the you better make sure she is cool with it when you decide to go your separate way from her.

Guys feel the need to lie not just about flirting and cheating but other things when they don't feel safe to communicate and perhaps feel misunderstood and will go on the defensive. A relationship needs to be built on not just honesty and communication, but acceptance and forgiveness. If a man feels like he is going to get the third degree whenever someone else catches his eye or something he says or does could be misconstrued as 'inappropriate', he will get defensive and will retreat into his man cave and learn that 'being honest and open' will most likely result in the s*** hitting the fan...so why bother?'

I speak from experience having a jealous ex-wife. Even when I did nothing (and I never cheated), I ended up getting grilled and accused and felt the need to defend myself. It is a vicious circle.

Frankly, i just don't understand it. If you are simply 'friends with benefits' then I guess it is not a big deal to share your partner with others and vise versa.

However, I fail to see how if you are serious about your partner, are choosing to give your body and heart to them...what does that say if you are fine with another person having sex with them or an emotional relationship. Do you have no pride in yourself or value your worth in terms of being that person's 'one and all'? If you are not jealous or guarded about such intimate contact with someone else like that, than I say that your relationship is built on nothing more than sex and 'friends with benefits' and not the deep relationship that love, trust, and loyalty is based on.

Just my two cents.

Bottom line, especially as you get older, is that if you are getting together with someone and having a serious relationship it will end up going two ways:

1) It will end by mutual understanding or a bad break up
2) You will be spending your life together.

If all you want is a 'friends with benefits' situation, then you will look for that and probably get it (though that is not without its own set of complications). However any serious relationship can really only go those two ways.

Something to think about before you really hook up seriously for someone.

It is just familiarity and commonality that makes one usually date or hook up with people of their own race. Just curious if someone has developed a serious interest in another race that you feel you just have to experience? The last two years I have been feeling the urge to connect with a black gal. I don't know what it is but I'm so curious to meet up with and fool around with a black woman.

I'd like to blame Michonne from The Walking Dead but that might seem shallow. lol.

Anybody else develop an obsession for interracial meet ups?

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